|
THE MAGIC WORLD
 He scrambled out of the cupboard, and the boots and
goloshes fell off him like spray off a bather.- P. 24.
CONTENTS
|
PAGE |
| 1. |
The Cat-hood of Maurice |
| 2. |
The Mixed Mine |
| 3. |
Accidental Magic |
| 4. |
The Princess and the
Hedge-pig |
| 5. |
Septimus Septimusson |
| 6. |
The White Cat |
| 7. |
Belinda and Bellamant |
| 8. |
Justnowland |
| 9. |
The Related Muff |
| 10. |
The Aunt and Amabel |
| 11. |
Kenneth and the Carp |
| 12. |
The Magician's Heart |
[p1] I THE CAT-HOOD OF MAURICE
To have your hair cut is not painful, nor does it
hurt to have your whiskers trimmed. But round wooden shoes, shaped like bowls,
are not comfortable wear, however much it may amuse the onlooker to see you try
to walk in them. If you have a nice fur coat like a company promoter's, it is
most annoying to be made to swim in it. And if you had a tail, surely it would
be solely your own affair; that any one should tie a tin can to it would strike
you as an unwarrantable impertinence-to say the least.
Yet it is difficult for an outsider to see these things from the point of
view of both the persons concerned. To Maurice, scissors in hand, alive and
earnest to snip, it seemed the most natural thing in the world to shorten the
stiff whiskers of Lord Hugh Cecil by a generous inch. He did not understand how
useful those whiskers were to Lord Hugh, both in sport and in the more serious
business of getting a living.[p2] Also
it amused Maurice to throw Lord Hugh into ponds, though Lord Hugh only once
permitted this liberty. To put walnuts on Lord Hugh's feet and then to watch him
walk on ice was, in Maurice's opinion, as good as a play. Lord Hugh was a very
favourite cat, but Maurice was discreet, and Lord Hugh, except under violent
suffering, was at that time anyhow, dumb.
But the empty sardine-tin attached to Lord Hugh's tail and hind legs-this had
a voice, and, rattling against stairs, banisters, and the legs of stricken
furniture, it cried aloud for vengeance. Lord Hugh, suffering violently, added
his voice, and this time the family heard. There was a chase, a chorus of 'Poor
pussy!'and 'Pussy, then!' and the tail and the tin and Lord Hugh were caught
under Jane's bed. The tail and the tin acquiesced in their rescue. Lord Hugh did
not. He fought, scratched, and bit. Jane carried the scars of that rescue for
many a long week.
When all was calm Maurice was sought and, after some little natural delay,
found-in the boot-cupboard.
'Oh, Maurice!' his mother almost sobbed,'how can you? What will your
father say?'
Maurice thought he knew what his father would do.
[p3] 'Don't you know,' the mother went on,'how wrong it is to
be cruel?'
'I didn't mean to be cruel,' Maurice said. And, what is more, he spoke the
truth. All the unwelcome attentions he had showered on Lord Hugh had not been
exactly intended to hurt that stout veteran-only it was interesting to see what
a cat would do if you threw it in the water, or cut its whiskers, or tied things
to its tail.
'Oh, but you must have meant to be cruel,' said mother, 'and you will have to
be punished.'
'I wish I hadn't,' said Maurice, from the heart.
'So do I,' said his mother, with a sigh;'but it isn't the first time; you
know you tied Lord Hugh up in a bag with the hedgehog only last Tuesday week.
You'd better go to your room and think it over. I shall have to tell your father
directly he comes home.'
Maurice went to his room and thought it over. And the more he thought the
more he hated Lord Hugh. Why couldn't the beastly cat have held his tongue and
sat still? That, at the time would have been a disappointment, but now Maurice
wished it had happened. He sat on the edge of his bed and savagely kicked the
edge of the green Kidderminster carpet, and hated the cat.
[p4] He hadn't meant to be cruel; he was sure he hadn't; he
wouldn't have pinched the cat's feet or squeezed its tail in the door, or pulled
its whiskers, or poured hot water on it. He felt himself ill-used, and knew
that he would feel still more so after the inevitable interview with his
father.
But that interview did not take the immediately painful form expected by
Maurice. His father did not say, 'Now I will show you what it feels
like to be hurt.' Maurice had braced himself for that, and was looking beyond it
to the calm of forgiveness which should follow the storm in which he should so
unwillingly take part. No; his father was already calm and reasonable-with a
dreadful calm, a terrifying reason.
'Look here, my boy,' he said. 'This cruelty to dumb animals must be
checked-severely checked.'
'I didn't mean to be cruel,' said Maurice.
'Evil,' said Mr. Basingstoke, for such was Maurice's surname, 'is wrought by
want of thought as well as want of heart. What about your putting the hen in the
oven?'
'You know,' said Maurice, pale but determined,'you know I only
wanted to help her to get her eggs hatched quickly. It says in “Fowls for Food
and Fancy” that heat hatches eggs.'
[p5] 'But she hadn't any eggs,' said Mr. Basingstoke.
'But she soon would have,' urged Maurice.'I thought a stitch in time--'
'That,' said his father, 'is the sort of thing that you must learn not to
think.'
'I'll try,' said Maurice, miserably hoping for the best.
'I intend that you shall,' said Mr. Basingstoke.'This afternoon you go to Dr.
Strongitharm's for the remaining week of term. If I find any more cruelty taking
place during the holidays you will go there permanently. You can go and get
ready.'
'Oh, father, please not,' was all Maurice found to say.
'I'm sorry, my boy,' said his father, much more kindly; 'it's all for your
own good, and it's as painful to me as it is to you-remember that. The cab will
be here at four. Go and put your things together, and Jane shall pack for
you.'
So the box was packed. Mabel, Maurice's kiddy sister, cried over everything
as it was put in. It was a very wet day.
'If it had been any school but old Strong's,'she sobbed.
She and her brother knew that school well: its windows, dulled with wire
blinds, its big[p6] alarm
bell, the high walls of its grounds, bristling with spikes, the iron gates,
always locked, through which gloomy boys, imprisoned, scowled on a free world.
Dr. Strongitharm's was a school 'for backward and difficult boys.' Need I say
more?
Well, there was no help for it. The box was packed, the cab was at the door.
The farewells had been said. Maurice determined that he wouldn't cry and he
didn't, which gave him the one touch of pride and joy that such a scene could
yield. Then at the last moment, just as father had one leg in the cab, the Taxes
called. Father went back into the house to write a cheque. Mother and Mabel had
retired in tears. Maurice used the reprieve to go back after his postage-stamp
album. Already he was planning how to impress the other boys at old Strong's,
and his was really a very fair collection. He ran up into the schoolroom,
expecting to find it empty. But some one was there: Lord Hugh, in the very
middle of the ink-stained table-cloth.
'You brute,' said Maurice; 'you know jolly well I'm going away, or you
wouldn't be here.' And, indeed, the room had never, somehow, been a favourite of
Lord Hugh's.
'Meaow,' said Lord Hugh.
[opp
p7]
 'If you think cats have such a jolly time,' said
Lord Hugh, 'why not bea cat?'
'Mew!' said Maurice, with scorn. 'That's[p7] what you always say. All that fuss about a jolly little
sardine-tin. Any one would have thought you'd be only too glad to have it to
play with. I wonder how you'd like being a boy? Lickings, and lessons, and
impots, and sent back from breakfast to wash your ears. You wash yours
anywhere-I wonder what they'd say to me if I washed my ears on the drawing-room
hearthrug?'
'Meaow,' said Lord Hugh, and washed an ear, as though he were showing
off.
'Mew,' said Maurice again; 'that's all you can say.'
'Oh, no, it isn't,' said Lord Hugh, and stopped his ear-washing.
'I say!' said Maurice in awestruck tones.
'If you think cats have such a jolly time,'said Lord Hugh, 'why not
be a cat?'
'I would if I could,' said Maurice, 'and fight you--'
'Thank you,' said Lord Hugh.
'But I can't,' said Maurice.
'Oh, yes, you can,' said Lord Hugh.'You've only got to say the word.'
'What word?'
Lord Hugh told him the word; but I will not tell you, for fear you should say
it by accident and then be sorry.
'And if I say that, I shall turn into a cat?'
[p8] 'Of course,' said the cat.
'Oh, yes, I see,' said Maurice. 'But I'm not taking any, thanks. I don't want
to be a cat for always.'
'You needn't,' said Lord Hugh. 'You've only got to get some one to say to
you, “Please leave off being a cat
and be Maurice again,”and there you are.'
Maurice thought of Dr. Strongitharm's. He also thought of the horror of his
father when he should find Maurice gone, vanished, not to be traced. 'He'll be
sorry, then,' Maurice told himself, and to the cat he said, suddenly:-
'Right-I'll do it. What's the word, again?'
'--,' said the cat.
'--,' said Maurice; and suddenly the table shot up to
the height of a house, the walls to the height of tenement buildings, the
pattern on the carpet became enormous, and Maurice found himself on all fours.
He tried to stand up on his feet, but his shoulders were oddly heavy. He could
only rear himself upright for a moment, and then fell heavily on his hands. He
looked down at them; they seemed to have grown shorter and fatter, and were
encased in black fur gloves. He felt a desire to walk on all fours-tried it-did
it. It was very odd-the movement of the arms[p9] straight from the shoulder, more like the movement of the
piston of an engine than anything Maurice could think of at that moment.
'I am asleep,' said Maurice-'I am dreaming this. I am dreaming I am a cat. I
hope I dreamed that about the sardine-tin and Lord Hugh's tail, and Dr.
Strong's.'
'You didn't,' said a voice he knew and yet didn't know, 'and you aren't
dreaming this.'
'Yes, I am,' said Maurice; 'and now I'm going to dream that I fight that
beastly black cat, and give him the best licking he ever had in his life. Come
on, Lord Hugh.'
A loud laugh answered him.
'Excuse my smiling,' said the voice he knew and didn't know, 'but don't you
see-youare Lord Hugh!'
A great hand picked Maurice up from the floor and held him in the air. He
felt the position to be not only undignified but unsafe, and gave himself a
shake of mingled relief and resentment when the hand set him down on the inky
table-cloth.
'You are Lord Hugh now, my dear Maurice,'said the voice, and a huge face came
quite close to his. It was his own face, as it would have seemed through a
magnifying glass. And the voice-oh, horror!-the voice was his own voice-Maurice
Basingstoke's voice. Maurice[p10]
shrank from the voice, and he would have liked to claw the face, but he
had had no practice.
'You are Lord Hugh,' the voice repeated,'and I am Maurice. I like being
Maurice. I am so large and strong. I could drown you in the water-butt, my poor
cat-oh, so easily. No, don't spit and swear. It's bad manners-even in a
cat.'
'Maurice!' shouted Mr. Basingstoke from between the door and the cab.
Maurice, from habit, leaped towards the door.
'It's no use your going,' said the thing that looked like a giant
reflection of Maurice;'it's me he wants.'
'But I didn't agree to your being me.'
'That's poetry, even if it isn't grammar,'said the thing that looked like
Maurice. 'Why, my good cat, don't you see that if you are I, I must be you?
Otherwise we should interfere with time and space, upset the balance of power,
and as likely as not destroy the solar system. Oh, yes-I'm you, right enough,
and shall be, till some one tells you to change from Lord Hugh into Maurice. And
now you've got to find some one to do it.'
('Maurice!' thundered the voice of Mr. Basingstoke.)
[p11] 'That'll be easy enough,' said Maurice.
'Think so?' said the other.
'But I sha'n't try yet. I want to have some fun first. I shall catch heaps of
mice!'
'Think so? You forget that your whiskers are cut off-Maurice cut them.
Without whiskers, how can you judge of the width of the places you go through?
Take care you don't get stuck in a hole that you can't get out of or go in
through, my good cat.'
'Don't call me a cat,' said Maurice, and felt that his tail was growing thick
and angry.
'You are a cat, you know-and that little bit of temper that I see in
your tail remindsme--'
Maurice felt himself gripped round the middle, abruptly lifted, and carried
swiftly through the air. The quickness of the movement made him giddy. The light
went so quickly past him that it might as well have been darkness. He saw
nothing, felt nothing, except a sort of long sea-sickness, and then suddenly he
was not being moved. He could see now. He could feel. He was being held tight in
a sort of vice-a vice covered with chequered cloth. It looked like the pattern,
very much exaggerated, of his school knickerbockers. It was. He was
being held between the hard, relentless knees of that creature that[p12] had once been Lord Hugh, and to whose tail he had tied a
sardine-tin. Now he was Lord Hugh, and something was being tied to
histail. Something mysterious, terrible. Very well, he would show that
he was not afraid of anything that could be attached to tails. The string rubbed
his fur the wrong way-it was that that annoyed him, not the string itself; and
as for what was at the end of the string, what could that matter to any
sensible cat? Maurice was quite decided that he was-and would keep on being-a
sensible cat.
The string, however, and the uncomfortable, tight position between those
chequered knees-something or other was getting on his nerves.
'Maurice!' shouted his father below, and the be-catted Maurice bounded
between the knees of the creature that
wore his clothes and his looks.
'Coming, father,' this thing called, and sped away, leaving Maurice on the
servant's bed-under which Lord Hugh had taken refuge, with his tin-can, so short
and yet so long a time ago. The stairs re-echoed to the loud boots which Maurice
had never before thought loud; he had often, indeed, wondered that any one could
object to them. He wondered now no longer.
[p13] He heard the front door slam. That thing had gone to Dr.
Strongitharm's. That was one comfort. Lord Hugh was a boy now; he would know
what it was to be a boy. He, Maurice, was a cat, and he meant to taste fully all
catty pleasures, from milk to mice. Meanwhile he was without mice or milk, and,
unaccustomed as he was to a tail, he could not but feel that all was not right
with his own. There was a feeling of weight, a feeling of discomfort, of
positive terror. If he should move, what would that thing that was tied to his
tail do? Rattle, of course. Oh, but he could not bear it if that thing rattled.
Nonsense; it was only a sardine-tin. Yes, Maurice knew that. But all the same-if
it did rattle! He moved his tail the least little soft inch. No sound. Perhaps
really there wasn't anything tied to his tail. But he couldn't be sure unless he
moved. But if he moved the thing would rattle, and if it rattled Maurice felt
sure that he would expire or go mad. A mad cat. What a dreadful thing to be! Yet
he couldn't sit on that bed for ever, waiting, waiting, waiting for the dreadful
thing to happen.
'Oh, dear,' sighed Maurice the cat. 'I never knew what people meant by
“afraid”before.'
His cat-heart was beating heavily against[p14] his furry side. His limbs were getting cramped-he must move.
He did. And instantly the awful thing happened. The sardine-tin touched the iron
of the bed-foot. It rattled.
'Oh, I can't bear it, I can't,' cried poor Maurice, in a heartrending meaow
that echoed through the house. He leaped from the bed and tore through the door
and down the stairs, and behind him came the most terrible thing in the world.
People might call it a sardine-tin, but he knew better. It was the soul of all
the fear that ever had been or ever could be. It rattled.
Maurice who was a cat flew down the stairs; down, down-the rattling horror
followed. Oh, horrible! Down, down! At the foot of the stairs the horror, caught
by something-a banister-a stair-rod-stopped. The string on Maurice's tail
tightened, his tail was jerked, he was stopped. But the noise had stopped too.
Maurice lay only just alive at the foot of the stairs.
It was Mabel who untied the string and soothed his terrors with strokings and
tender love-words. Maurice was surprised to find what a nice little girl his
sister really was.
'I'll never tease you again,' he tried to say, softly-but that was not what
he said. What he said was 'Purrrr.'
[opp
p14]
 It was Mabel who untied the string and soothed his
terrors.
[p15] 'Dear pussy, nice poor pussy, then,' said Mabel, and she
hid away the sardine-tin and did not tell any one. This seemed unjust to Maurice
until he remembered that, of course, Mabel thought that he was really Lord Hugh,
and that the person who had tied the tin to his tail was her brother Maurice.
Then he was half grateful. She carried him down, in soft, safe arms, to the
kitchen, and asked cook to give him some milk.
'Tell me to change back into Maurice,' said Maurice who was quite worn out by
his cattish experiences. But no one heard him. What they heard was,
'Meaow-Meaow-Meeeaow!'
Then Maurice saw how he had been tricked. He could be changed back into a boy
as soon as any one said to him, 'Leave off being a cat and be Maurice again,'
but his tongue had no longer the power to ask any one to say it.
He did not sleep well that night. For one thing he was not accustomed to
sleeping on the kitchen hearthrug, and the blackbeetles were too many and too
cordial. He was glad when cook came down and turned him out into the garden,
where the October frost still lay white on the yellowed stalks of sunflowers and
nasturtiums. He took a walk, climbed a tree, failed to catch a bird, and felt
better. He began also to feel hungry. A delicious scent[p16came
stealing out of the back kitchen door. Oh, joy, there were to be herrings for
breakfast! Maurice hastened in and took his place on his usual chair.
His mother said, 'Down, puss,' and gently tilted the chair so that Maurice
fell off it. Then the family had herrings. Maurice said, 'You might give me
some,' and he said it so often that his father, who, of course, heard only
mewings, said:-
'For goodness' sake put that cat out of the room.'
Maurice breakfasted later, in the dust-bin, on herring heads.
But he kept himself up with a new and splendid idea. They would give him milk
presently, and then they should see.
He spent the afternoon sitting on the sofa in the dining-room, listening to
the conversation of his father and mother. It is said that listeners never hear
any good of themselves. Maurice heard so much that he was surprised and humbled.
He heard his father say that he was a fine, plucky little chap, but he needed a
severe lesson, and Dr. Strongitharm was the man to give it to him. He heard his
mother say things that made his heart throb in his throat and the tears prick
behind those green cat-eyes of his. He had always thought his[p17] parents a little bit unjust. Now they did him so much more
than justice that he felt quite small and mean inside his cat-skin.
[opp
p17]
 He landed there on his four padded feet light as a
feather.
'He's a dear, good, affectionate boy,' said mother. 'It's only his high
spirits. Don't you think, darling, perhaps you were a little hard on him?'
'It was for his own good,' said father.
'Of course,' said mother; 'but I can't bear to think of him at that dreadful
school.'
'Well--,' father was beginning, when Jane came in
with the tea-things on a clattering tray, whose sound made Maurice tremble in
every leg. Father and mother began to talk about the weather.
Maurice felt very affectionately to both his parents. The natural way of
showing this was to jump on to the sideboard and thence on to his father's
shoulders. He landed there on his four padded feet, light as a feather, but
father was not pleased.
'Bother the cat!' he cried. 'Jane, put it out of the room.'
Maurice was put out. His great idea, which was to be carried out with milk,
would certainly not be carried out in the dining-room. He sought the kitchen,
and, seeing a milk-can on the window-ledge, jumped up beside the can and patted
it as he had seen Lord Hugh do.
[p18] 'My!' said a friend of Jane's who happened to be there,
'ain't that cat clever-a perfect moral, I call her.'
'He's nothing to boast of this time,' said cook. 'I will say for Lord Hugh
he's not often taken in with a empty can.'
This was naturally mortifying for Maurice, but he pretended not to hear, and
jumped from the window to the tea-table and patted the milk-jug.
'Come,' said the cook, 'that's more like it,'and she poured him out a full
saucer and set it on the floor.
Now was the chance Maurice had longed for. Now he could carry out that idea
of his. He was very thirsty, for he had had nothing since that delicious
breakfast in the dust-bin. But not for worlds would he have drunk the milk. No.
He carefully dipped his right paw in it, for his idea was to make letters with
it on the kitchen oil-cloth. He meant to
write:'Please tell me to leave off being a cat and be Maurice again,' but he
found his paw a very clumsy pen, and he had to rub out the first'P' because it
only looked like an accident. Then he tried again and actually did make a'P'
that any fair-minded person could have read quite easily.
'I wish they'd notice,' he said, and before he got the 'l' written they did
notice.
[p19] 'Drat the cat,' said cook; 'look how he's messing the
floor up.'
And she took away the milk.
Maurice put pride aside and mewed to have the milk put down again. But he did
not get it.
Very weary, very thirsty, and very tired of being Lord Hugh, he presently
found his way to the schoolroom, where Mabel with patient toil was doing her
home-lessons. She took him on her lap and stroked him while she learned her
French verb. He felt that he was growing very fond of her. People were quite
right to be kind to dumb animals. Presently she had to stop stroking him and do
a map. And after that she kissed him and put him down and went away. All the
time she had been doing the map, Maurice had had but one thought:
Ink!
The moment the door had closed behind her-how sensible people were who closed
doors gently-he stood up in her chair with one paw on the map and the other on
the ink. Unfortunately, the inkstand top was made to dip pens in, and not to dip
paws. But Maurice was desperate. He deliberately upset the ink-most of it rolled
over the table-cloth and fell pattering on the carpet, but with what was left he
wrote quite plainly, across the map:-
[p20]
'Please tell Lord Hugh to stop being a cat and be
Mau rice again.'
'There!' he said; 'they can't make any mistake about that.' They didn't. But
they made a mistake about who had done it, and Mabel was deprived of jam with
her supper bread.
Her assurance that some naughty boy must have come through the window and
done it while she was not there convinced nobody, and, indeed, the window was
shut and bolted.
Maurice, wild with indignation, did not mend matters by seizing the
opportunity of a few minutes' solitude to write:-
'It was not
Mabel it was Maur ice I mean Lord Hugh,'
because when that was seen Mabel was instantly sent to bed.
'It's not fair!' cried Maurice.
'My dear,' said Maurice's father, 'if that cat goes on mewing to this extent
you'll have to get rid of it.'
[opp
p21]
 When Jane went in to put Mabel's light out Maurice
crept in too.
Maurice said not another word. It was bad enough to be a cat, but to be a cat
that was 'got rid of'!
He knew how people got rid of cats. In a stricken silence he left the[p21room and slunk up the stairs-he dared not mew again, even at
the door of Mabel's room. But when Jane went in to put Mabel's light out Maurice
crept in too, and in the dark tried with stifled mews and purrs to explain to
Mabel how sorry he was. Mabel stroked him and he went to sleep, his last waking
thought amazement at the blindness that had once made him call her a silly
little kid.
If you have ever been a cat you will understand something of what Maurice
endured during the dreadful days that followed. If you have not, I can never
make you understand fully. There was the affair of the fishmonger's tray
balanced on the wall by the back door-the delicious curled-up whiting; Maurice
knew as well as you do that one mustn't steal fish out of other people's trays,
but the cat that he was didn't know. There was an inward struggle-and Maurice
was beaten by the cat-nature. Later he was beaten by the cook.
Then there was that very painful incident with the butcher's dog, the flight
across gardens, the safety of the plum tree gained only just in time.
And, worst of all, despair took hold of him, for he saw that nothing he could
do would make any one say those simple words that would release him. He had
hoped that Mabel[p22might
at last be made to understand, but the ink had failed him; she did not
understand his subdued mewings, and when he got the cardboard letters and made
the same sentence with them Mabel only thought it was that naughty boy who came
through locked windows. Somehow he could not spell before any one-his nerves
were not what they had been. His brain now gave him no new ideas. He felt that
he was really growing like a cat in his mind. His interest in his meals grew
beyond even what it had been when they were a schoolboy's meals. He hunted mice
with growing enthusiasm, though the loss of his whiskers to measure narrow
places with made hunting difficult.
He grew expert in bird-stalking, and often got quite near to a bird before it
flew away, laughing at him. But all the time, in his heart, he was very, very
miserable. And so the week went by.
Maurice in his cat shape dreaded more and more the time when Lord Hugh in the
boy shape should come back from Dr. Strongitharm's. He knew-who better?-exactly
the kind of things boys do to cats, and he trembled to the end of his handsome
half-Persian tail.
And then the boy came home from Dr. Strongitharm's, and at the first sound of
his[p23boots in the hall Maurice in the cat's body fled with silent
haste to hide in the boot-cupboard.
Here, ten minutes later, the boy that had come back from Dr. Strongitharm's
found him.
Maurice fluffed up his tail and unsheathed his claws. Whatever this boy was
going to do to him Maurice meant to resist, and his resistance should hurt the
boy as much as possible. I am sorry to say Maurice swore softly among the boots,
but cat-swearing is not really wrong.
'Come out, you old duffer,' said Lord Hugh in the boy shape of Maurice. 'I'm
not going to hurt you.'
'I'll see to that,' said Maurice, backing into the corner, all teeth and
claws.
'Oh, I've had such a time!' said Lord Hugh. 'It's no use, you know, old chap;
I can see where you are by your green eyes. My word, they do shine. I've been
caned and shut up in a dark room and given thousands of lines to write out.'
'I've been beaten, too, if you come to that,' mewed Maurice. 'Besides the
butcher's dog.'
It was an intense relief to speak to some one who could understand his
mews.
'Well, I suppose it's Pax for the future,'[p24said Lord Hugh; 'if you won't come out, you won't. Please
leave off being a cat and be Maurice again.'
And instantly Maurice, amid a heap of goloshes and old tennis bats, felt with
a swelling heart that he was no longer a cat. No more of those undignified four
legs, those tiresome pointed ears, so difficult to wash, that furry coat, that
contemptible tail, and that terrible inability to express all one's feelings in
two words-'mew' and 'purr.'
He scrambled out of the cupboard, and the boots and goloshes fell off him
like spray off a bather.
He stood upright in those very chequered knickerbockers that were so terrible
when their knees held one vice-like, while things were tied to one's tail. He
was face to face with another boy, exactly like himself.
'You haven't changed, then-but there can't be two Maurices.'
'There sha'n't be; not if I know it,' said the other boy; 'a boy's life's a dog's
life. Quick, before any one comes.'
'Quick what?' asked Maurice.
'Why tell me to leave off being a boy, and to be Lord Hugh Cecil again.'
Maurice told him at once. And at once the boy was gone, and there was Lord
Hugh in[p25his own shape, purring politely, yet with a watchful eye on
Maurice's movements.
'Oh, you needn't be afraid, old chap. It's Pax right enough,' Maurice
murmured in the ear of Lord Hugh. And Lord Hugh, arching his back under
Maurice's stroking hand, replied with a purrrr-meaow that spoke volumes.
'Oh, Maurice, here you are. It is nice of you to be nice to Lord
Hugh, when it was because of him you--'
'He's a good old chap,' said Maurice, carelessly.'And you're
not half a bad old girl. See?'
Mabel almost wept for joy at this magnificent compliment, and Lord Hugh
himself took on a more happy and confident air.
Please dismiss any fears which you may entertain that after this Maurice
became a model boy. He didn't. But he was much nicer than before. The
conversation which he overheard when he was a cat makes him more patient with
his father and mother. And he is almost always nice to Mabel, for he cannot
forget all that she was to him when he wore the shape of Lord Hugh. His father
attributes all the improvement in his son's character to that week at Dr.
Strongitharm's-which, as you know, Maurice never had. Lord Hugh's character is
unchanged. Cats learn slowly and with difficulty.
[p26] Only Maurice and Lord Hugh know the truth-Maurice has
never told it to any one except me, and Lord Hugh is a very reserved cat. He
never at any time had that free flow of mew which distinguished and endangered
the cat-hood of Maurice.
[p27] II THE MIXED MINE
The ship was first sighted off Dungeness. She was
labouring heavily. Her paint was peculiar and her rig outlandish. She looked
like a golden ship out of a painted picture.
'Blessed if I ever see such a rig-nor such lines neither,' old Hawkhurst
said.
It was a late afternoon, wild and grey. Slate-coloured clouds drove across
the sky like flocks of hurried camels. The waves were purple and blue, and in
the west a streak of unnatural-looking green light was all that stood for the
splendours of sunset.
'She do be a rum 'un,' said young Benenden, who had strolled along the beach
with the glasses the gentleman gave him for saving the little boy from drowning.
'Don't know as I ever see another just like her.'
'I'd give half a dollar to any chap as can tell me where she hails from-and
what port[p28it is where they has ships o'
that cut,' said middle-aged Haversham to the group that had now gathered.
'George!' exclaimed young Benenden from under his field-glasses, 'she's
going.' And she went. Her bow went down suddenly and she stood stern up in the
water-like a duck after rain. Then quite slowly, with no unseemly hurry, but
with no moment's change of what seemed to be her fixed purpose, the ship sank
and the grey rolling waves wiped out the place where she had been.
Now I hope you will not expect me to tell you anything more about this
ship-because there is nothing more to tell. What country she came from, what
port she was bound for, what cargo she carried, and what kind of tongue her crew
spoke-all these things are dead secrets. And a dead secret is a secret that
nobody knows. No other secrets are dead secrets. Even I do not know this one, or
I would tell you at once. For I, at least, have no secrets from you.
[opp
p28]
 Her bow went down suddenly.
When ships go down off Dungeness, things from them have a way of being washed
up on the sands of that bay which curves from Dungeness to Folkestone, where the
sea has bitten a piece out of the land-just such a half-moon-shaped piece as you
bite out of a slice of[p29bread-and-butter. Bits of wood tangled with ropes-broken
furniture-ships' biscuits in barrels and kegs that have held brandy-seamen's
chests-and sometimes sadder things that we will not talk about just now.
Now, if you live by the sea and are grown-up you know that if you find
anything on the seashore (I don't mean starfish or razor-shells or jellyfish and
sea-mice, but anything out of a ship that you would really like to keep) your
duty is to take it up to the coast-guard and say,'Please, I've found this.'
Then the coast-guard will send it to the proper authority, and one of these days
you'll get a reward of one-third of the value of whatever it was that you picked
up. But two-thirds of the value of anything, or even three-thirds of its value,
is not at all the same thing as the thing itself-if it happened to be the kind
of thing you want. But if you are not grown-up and do not live by the sea, but
in a nice little villa in a nice little suburb, where all the furniture is new
and the servants wear white aprons and white caps with long strings in the
afternoon, then you won't know anything about your duty, and if you find
anything by the sea you'll think that findings are keepings.
Edward was not grown-up-and he kept everything he found, including sea-mice,
till the[p30landlady of the lodgings where
his aunt was threw his collection into the pig-pail.
Being a quiet and persevering little boy he did not cry or complain, but
having meekly followed his treasures to their long home-the pig was six feet
from nose to tail, and ate the dead sea-mouse as easily and happily as your
father eats an oyster-he started out to make a new collection.
And the first thing he found was an oyster-shell that was pink and green and
blue inside, and the second was an old boot-very old indeed-and the third was
it.
It was a square case of old leather embossed with odd little figures of men
and animals and words that Edward could not read. It was oblong and had no key,
but a sort of leather hasp, and was curiously knotted with string-rather like a
boot-lace. And Edward opened it. There were several things inside: queer-looking
instruments, some rather like those in the little box of mathematical
instruments that he had had as a prize at school, and some like nothing he had
ever seen before. And in a deep groove of the russet soaked velvet lining lay a
neat little brass telescope.
T-squares and set-squares and so forth are of little use on a sandy shore.
But you can always look through a telescope.
[p31] Edward picked it out and put it to his eye, and tried to
see through it a little tug that was sturdily puffing up Channel. He failed to
find the tug, and found himself gazing at a little cloud on the horizon. As he
looked it grew larger and darker, and presently a spot of rain fell on his nose.
He rubbed it off-on his jersey sleeve, I am sorry to say, and not on his
handkerchief. Then he looked through the glass again; but he found he needed
both hands to keep it steady, so he set down the box with the other instruments
on the sand at his feet and put the glass to his eye again.
He never saw the box again. For in his unpractised efforts to cover the tug
with his glass he found himself looking at the shore instead of at the sea, and
the shore looked so odd that he could not make up his mind to stop looking at
it.
He had thought it was a sandy shore, but almost at once he saw that it was
not sand but fine shingle, and the discovery of this mistake surprised him so
much that he kept on looking at the shingle through the little telescope, which
showed it quite plainly. And as he looked the shingle grew coarser; it was
stones now-quite decent-sized stones, large stones, enormous stones.
[p32] Something hard pressed against his foot, and he lowered
the glass.
He was surrounded by big stones, and they all seemed to be moving; some were
tumbling off others that lay in heaps below them, and others were rolling away
from the beach in every direction. And the place where he had put down the box
was covered with great stones which he could not move.
Edward was very much upset. He had never been accustomed to great stones that
moved about when no one was touching them, and he looked round for some one to
ask how it had happened.
The only person in sight was another boy in a blue jersey with red letters on
its chest.
'Hi!' said Edward, and the boy also said'Hi!'
'Come along here,' said Edward, 'and I'll show you something.'
'Right-o!' the boy remarked, and came.
The boy was staying at the camp where the white tents were below the Grand
Redoubt. His home was quite unlike Edward's, though he also lived with his aunt.
The boy's home was very dirty and very small, and nothing in it was ever in its
right place. There was no furniture to speak of. The servants did not wear white
caps with long streamers, because[p33there were no servants. His
uncle was a dock-labourer and his aunt went out washing. But he had felt just
the same pleasure in being shown things that Edward or you or I might have felt,
and he went climbing over the big stones to where Edward stood waiting for him
in a sort of pit among the stones with the little telescope in his hand.
'I say,' said Edward, 'did you see any one move these stones?'
'I ain't only just come up on to the sea-wall,'said the boy, who was called
Gustus.
'They all came round me,' said Edward, rather pale. 'I didn't see any one
shoving them.'
'Who're you a-kiddin' of?' the boy inquired.
'But I did,' said Edward, 'honour bright I did. I was just taking a
squint through this little telescope I've found-and they came rolling up to
me.'
'Let's see what you found,' said Gustus, and Edward gave him the glass. He
directed it with inexpert fingers to the sea-wall, so little trodden that on it
the grass grows, and the sea-pinks, and even convolvulus and
mock-strawberry.
'Oh, look!' cried Edward, very loud.'Look at the grass!'
[p34] Gustus let the glass fall to long arm's length and said
'Krikey!'
The grass and flowers on the sea-wall had grown a foot and a half-quite
tropical they looked.
'Well?' said Edward.
'What's the matter wiv everyfink?' said Gustus. 'We must both be a bit balmy,
seems ter me.'
'What's balmy?' asked Edward.
'Off your chump-looney-like what you and me is,' said Gustus. 'First I sees
things, then I sees you.'
'It was only fancy, I expect,' said Edward.'I expect the grass on the
sea-wall was always like that, really.'
'Let's have a look through your spy-glass at that little barge,' said Gustus,
still holding the glass. 'Come on outer these 'ere paving-stones.'
'There was a box,' said Edward, 'a box I found with lots of jolly things in
it. I laid it down somewhere-and--'
'Ain't that it over there?' Gustus asked, and levelled the glass at a dark
object a hundred yards away. 'No; it's only an old boot. I say, this is a fine
spy-glass. It does make things come big.'
'That's not it. I'm certain I put it down somewhere just here. Oh,
don't!'
[opp
p35]
 'Look!' he said, 'look!' and pointed.
[p35] He snatched the glass from Gustus.
'Look!' he said, 'look!' and pointed.
A hundred yards away stood a boot about as big as the bath you see Marat in
at Madame Tussaud's.
'S'welp me,' said Gustus, 'we're asleep, both of us, and a-dreaming as things
grow while we look at them.'
'But we're not dreaming,' Edward objected.'You let me pinch you and you'll
see.'
'No fun in that,' said Gustus. 'Tell you what-it's the spy-glass-that's what
it is. Ever see any conjuring? I see a chap at the Mile End Empire what made
things turn into things like winking. It's the spy-glass, that's what it
is.'
'It can't be,' said the little boy who lived in a villa.
'But it is,' said the little boy who lived in a slum. 'Teacher says
there ain't no bounds to the wonders of science. Blest if this ain't one of
'em.'
'Let me look,' said Edward.
'All right; only you mark me. Whatever you sets eyes on'll grow and grow-like
the flower-tree the conjurer had under the wipe. Don't you look at me,
that's all. Hold on; I'll put something up for you to look at-a mark
like-something as doesn't matter.'
[p36] He fumbled in his pocket and brought out a boot-lace.
'I hold this up,' he said, 'and you look.'
Next moment he had dropped the boot-lace, which, swollen as it was with the
magic of the glass, lay like a snake on the stone at his feet.
So the glass was a magic glass, as, of course, you know already.
'My!' said Gustus, 'wouldn't I like to look at my victuals through that
there!'
Thus we find Edward, of the villa-and through him
Gustus, of the slum-in possession of a unique instrument of magic. What could
they do with it?
This was the question which they talked over every time they met, and they
met continually. Edward's aunt, who at home watched him as cats watch mice,
rashly believed that at the seaside there was no mischief for a boy to get into.
And the gentleman who commanded the tented camp believed in the ennobling
effects of liberty.
After the boot, neither had dared to look at anything through the
telescope-and so they looked at it, and polished it on their sleeves
till it shone again.
Both were agreed that it would be a fine thing to get some money and look at
it, so that[p37it would grow big. But Gustus
never had any pocket-money, and Edward had had his confiscated to pay for a
window he had not intended to break.
Gustus felt certain that some one would find out about the spy-glass and take
it away from them. His experience was that anything you happened to like was
always taken away. Edward knew that his aunt would want to take the telescope
away to 'take care of' for him. This had already happened with the carved
chessmen that his father had sent him from India.
'I been thinking,' said Gustus, on the third day. 'When I'm a man I'm a-going
to be a burglar. You has to use your headpiece in that trade, I tell you. So I
don't think thinking's swipes, like some blokes do. And I think p'r'aps it don't
turn everything big. An' if we could find out what it don't turn big we could
see what we wanted to turn big or what it didn't turn big, and then it wouldn't
turn anything big except what we wanted it to. See?'
Edward did not see; and I don't suppose you do, either.
So Gustus went on to explain that teacher had told him there were some
substances impervious to light, and some to cold, and so on and so forth, and
that what they wanted[p38was a
substance that should be impervious to the magic effects of the spy-glass.
'So if we get a tanner and set it on a plate and squint at it it'll get
bigger-but so'll the plate. And we don't want to litter the place up with plates
the bigness of cartwheels. But if the plate didn't get big we could look at the
tanner till it covered the plate, and then go on looking and looking and looking
and see nothing but the tanner till it was as big as a circus. See?'
This time Edward did see. But they got no further, because it was time to go
to the circus. There was a circus at Dymchurch just then, and that was what made
Gustus think of the sixpence growing to that size.
It was a very nice circus, and all the boys from the camp went to it-also
Edward, who managed to scramble over and wriggle under benches till he was
sitting near his friend.
[opp
p39]
 Far above him and every one else towered the
elephant.
It was the size of the elephant that did it. Edward had not seen an elephant
before, and when he saw it, instead of saying, 'What a size he is!' as everybody
else did, he said to himself, 'What a size I could make him!'and pulled out the
spy-glass, and by a miracle of good luck or bad got it levelled at the elephant
as it went by. He turned the glass slowly-as it went out-and the elephant[p39only just got out in time. Another moment and it would have
been too big to get through the door. The audience cheered madly. They thought
it was a clever trick; and so it would have been, very clever.
'You silly cuckoo,' said Gustus, bitterly,'now you've turned that great thing
loose on the country, and how's his keeper to manage him?'
'I could make the keeper big, too.'
'Then if I was you I should just bunk out and do it.'
Edward obeyed, slipped under the canvas of the circus tent, and found himself
on the yellow, trampled grass of the field among guy-ropes, orange-peel,
banana-skins, and dirty paper. Far above him and every one else towered the
elephant-it was now as big as the church.
Edward pointed the glass at the man who was patting the elephant's foot-that
was as far up as he could reach-and telling it to'Come down with you!' He was
very much frightened. He did not know whether you could be put in prison for
making an elephant's keeper about forty times his proper size. But he felt that
something must be done to control the gigantic mountain of black-lead-coloured
living flesh. So he looked[p40at the
keeper through the spy-glass, and the keeper remained his normal size!
In the shock of this failure he dropped the spy-glass, picked it up, and
tried once more to fix the keeper. Instead he only got a circle of
black-lead-coloured elephant; and while he was trying to find the keeper, and
finding nothing but more and more of the elephant, a shout startled him and he
dropped the glass once more. He was a very clumsy little boy, was Edward.
'Well,' said one of the men, 'what a turn it give me! I thought Jumbo'd grown
as big as a railway station, s'welp me if I didn't.'
'Now that's rum,' said another, 'so did I.'
'And he ain't,' said a third; 'seems to me he's a bit below his
usual figure. Got a bit thin or somethink, ain't he?'
Edward slipped back into the tent unobserved.
'It's all right,' he whispered to his friend,'he's gone back to his proper
size, and the man didn't change at all.'
'Ho!' Gustus said slowly-'Ho! All right. Conjuring's a rum thing. You don't
never know where you are!'
'Don't you think you might as well be a conjurer as a burglar?' suggested
Edward, who had had his friend's criminal future rather painfully on his mind
for the last hour.
[p41] 'You might,' said Gustus, 'not me. My people
ain't dooks to set me up on any such a swell lay as conjuring. Now I'm going to
think, I am. You hold your jaw and look at the 'andsome Dona a-doin' of 'er
griceful barebacked hact.'
That evening after tea Edward went, as he had been told to do, to the place
on the shore where the big stones had taught him the magic of the spy-glass.
Gustus was already at the tryst.
'See here,' he said, 'I'm a-goin' to do something brave and fearless, I am,
like Lord Nelson and the boy on the fire-ship. You out with that spy-glass, an'
I'll let you look at me. Then we'll know where we are.'
'But s'pose you turn into a giant?'
'Don't care. 'Sides, I shan't. T'other bloke didn't.'
'P'r'aps,' said Edward, cautiously, 'it only works by the seashore.'
'Ah,' said Gustus, reproachfully, 'you've been a-trying to think, that's what
you've been a-doing. What about the elephant, my emernent scientister? Now,
then!'
Very much afraid, Edward pulled out the glass and looked.
And nothing happened.
[p42] 'That's number one,' said Gustus, 'now, number two.'
He snatched the telescope from Edward's hand, and turned it round and looked
through the other end at the great stones. Edward, standing by, saw them get
smaller and smaller-turn to pebbles, to beach, to sand. When Gustus turned the
glass to the giant grass and flowers on the sea-wall, they also drew back into
themselves, got smaller and smaller, and presently were as they had been before
ever Edward picked up the magic spy-glass.
'Now we know all about it-I don't think,'said Gustus. 'To-morrow
we'll have a look at that there model engine of yours that you say works.'
[opp
p42]
 It became a quite efficient motor.
They did. They had a look at it through the spy-glass, and it became a quite
efficient motor; of rather an odd pattern it is true, and very bumpy, but
capable of quite a decent speed. They went up to the hills in it, and so odd was
its design that no one who saw it ever forgot it. People talk about that rummy
motor at Bonnington and Aldington to this day. They stopped often, to use the
spy-glass on various objects. Trees, for instance, could be made to grow
surprisingly, and there were patches of giant wheat found that year near Ashford
that were never satisfactorily accounted for. Blackberries,[p43too,
could be enlarged to a most wonderful and delicious fruit. And the sudden growth
of a fugitive toffee-drop found in Edward's pocket and placed on the hand was a
happy surprise. When you scraped the pocket dirt off the outside you had a pound
of delicious toffee. Not so happy was the incident of the earwig, which crawled
into view when Edward was enlarging a wild strawberry, and had grown the size of
a rat before the slow but horrified Edward gained courage to shake it off.
It was a beautiful drive. As they came home they met a woman driving a
weak-looking little cow. It went by on one side of the engine and the woman went
by on the other. When they were restored to each other the cow was nearly the
size of a cart-horse, and the woman did not recognise it. She ran back along the
road after her cow, which must, she said, have taken fright at the beastly
motor. She scolded violently as she went. So the boys had to make the cow small
again, when she wasn't looking.
'This is all very well,' said Gustus, 'but we've got our fortune to make, I
don't think. We've got to get hold of a tanner-or a bob would be better.'
But this was not possible, because that[p44broken window wasn't paid for, and Gustus never had any
money.
'We ought to be the benefactors of the human race,' said Edward; 'make all
the good things more and all the bad things less.'
And that was all very well-but the cow hadn't been a great success,
as Gustus reminded him.
'I see I shall have to do some of my thinking,' he added.
They stopped in a quiet road close by Dymchurch; the engine was made small
again, and Edward went home with it under his arm.
It was the next day that they found the shilling on the road. They could
hardly believe their good luck. They went out on to the shore with it, put it on
Edward's hand while Gustus looked at it with the glass, and the shilling began
to grow.
'It's as big as a saucer,' said Edward, 'and it's heavy. I'll rest it on
these stones. It's as big as a plate; it's as big as a tea-tray; it's as big as
a cart-wheel.'
And it was.
'Now,' said Gustus, 'we'll go and borrow a cart to take it away. Come
on.'
But Edward could not come on. His hand was in the hollow between the two
stones, and above lay tons of silver. He could not move,[p45and
the stones couldn't move. There was nothing for it but to look at the great
round lump of silver through the wrong end of the spy-glass till it got small
enough for Edward to lift it. And then, unfortunately, Gustus looked a little
too long, and the shilling, having gone back to its own size, went a little
further-and it went to sixpenny size, and then went out altogether.
So nobody got anything by that.
And now came the time when, as was to be expected, Edward dropped the
telescope in his aunt's presence. She said, 'What's that?'picked it up with
quite unfair quickness, and looked through it, and through the open window at a
fishing-boat, which instantly swelled to the size of a man-of-war.
'My goodness! what a strong glass!' said the aunt.
'Isn't it?' said Edward, gently taking it from her. He looked at the ship
through the glass's other end till she got to her proper size again and then
smaller. He just stopped in time to prevent its disappearing altogether.
'I'll take care of it for you,' said the aunt. And for the first time in
their lives Edward said 'No' to his aunt.
It was a terrible moment.
Edward, quite frenzied by his own courage,[p46turned the glass on one object after another-the furniture
grew as he looked, and when he lowered the glass the aunt was pinned fast
between a monster table-leg and a great chiffonier.
'There!' said Edward. 'And I shan't let you out till you say you won't take
it to take care of either.'
'Oh, have it your own way,' said the aunt, faintly, and closed her eyes. When
she opened them the furniture was its right size and Edward was gone. He had
twinges of conscience, but the aunt never mentioned the subject again. I have
reason to suppose thatshe supposed that she had had a fit of an unusual
and alarming nature.
Next day the boys in the camp were to go back to their slums. Edward and
Gustus parted on the seashore and Edward cried. He had never met a boy whom he
liked as he liked Gustus. And Gustus himself was almost melted.
'I will say for you you're more like a man and less like a snivelling white
rabbit now than what you was when I met you. Well, we ain't done nothing to
speak of with that there conjuring trick of yours, but we've 'ad a right good
time. So long. See you 'gain some day.'
[p47] Edward hesitated, spluttered, and still weeping flung his
arms round Gustus.
''Ere, none o' that,' said Gustus, sternly.'If you ain't man enough to know
better, I am. Shake 'ands like a Briton; right about face-and part game.'
He suited the action to the word.
Edward went back to his aunt snivelling, defenceless but happy. He had never
had a friend except Gustus, and now he had given Gustus the greatest treasure
that he possessed.
For Edward was not such a white rabbit as he seemed. And in that last embrace
he had managed to slip the little telescope into the pocket of the reefer coat
which Gustus wore, ready for his journey.
It was the greatest treasure that Edward had, but it was also the greatest
responsibility, so that while he felt the joy of self-sacrifice he also felt the
rapture of relief. Life is full of such mixed moments.
And the holidays ended and Edward went back to his villa. Be sure he had
given Gustus his home address, and begged him to write, but Gustus never
did.
Presently Edward's father came home from India, and they left his aunt to her
villa and went to live at a jolly little house on a sloping hill at Chiselhurst,
which was Edward's father's[p48very
own. They were not rich, and Edward could not go to a very good school, and
though there was enough to eat and wear, what there was was very plain. And
Edward's father had been wounded, and somehow had not got a pension.
Now one night in the next summer Edward woke up in his bed with the feeling
that there was some one in the room. And there was. A dark figure was squeezing
itself through the window. Edward was far too frightened to scream. He simply
lay and listened to his heart. It was like listening to a cheap American clock.
The next moment a lantern flashed in his eyes and a masked face bent over
him.
'Where does your father keep his money?'said a muffled voice.
'In the b-b-b-b-bank,' replied the wretched Edward, truthfully.
'I mean what he's got in the house.'
'In his trousers pocket,' said Edward, 'only he puts it in the dressing-table
drawer at night.'
'You must go and get it,' said the burglar, for such he plainly was.
'Must I?' said Edward, wondering how he could get out of betraying his
father's confidence and being branded as a criminal.
'Yes,' said the burglar in an awful voice,'get up and go.'
[p49] 'No,' said Edward, and he was as much surprised
at his courage as you are.
'Bravo!' said the burglar, flinging off his mask. 'I see you aren't
such a white rabbit as what I thought you.'
'It's Gustus,' said Edward. 'Oh, Gustus, I'm so glad! Oh, Gustus, I'm so
sorry! I always hoped you wouldn't be a burglar. And now you are.'
'I am so,' said Gustus, with pride, 'but,' he added sadly, 'this is my first
burglary.'
'Couldn't it be the last?' suggested Edward.
'That,' replied Gustus, 'depends on you.'
'I'll do anything,' said Edward, 'anything.'
'You see,' said Gustus, sitting down on the edge of the bed in a confidential
attitude, with the dark lantern in one hand and the mask in the other, 'when
you're as hard up as we are, there's not much of a living to be made honest. I'm
sure I wonder we don't all of us turn burglars, so I do. And that glass of
yours-you little beggar-you did me proper-sticking of that thing in my pocket
like what you did. Well, it kept us alive last winter, that's a cert. I used to
look at the victuals with it, like what I said I would. A farden's worth o'
pease-pudden was a dinner for three when that glass was about, and a penn'orth
o' scraps turned into a big beef-steak almost. They used to wonder[p50how I got so much for the money. But I'm always afraid o'
being found out-or of losing the blessed spy-glass-or of some one pinching it.
So we got to do what I always said-make some use of it. And if I go along and
nick your father's dibs we'll make our fortunes right away.'
'No,' said Edward, 'but I'll ask father.'
'Rot.' Gustus was crisp and contemptuous.'He'd think you was off your chump,
and he'd get me lagged.'
'It would be stealing,' said Edward.
'Not when you'll pay it back.'
'Yes, it would,' said Edward. 'Oh, don't ask me-I can't.'
'Then I shall,' said Gustus. 'Where's his room.'
'Oh, don't!' said Edward. 'I've got a half-sovereign of my own. I'll give you
that.'
'Lawk!' said Gustus. 'Why the blue monkeys couldn't you say so? Come on.'
He pulled Edward out of bed by the leg, hurried his clothes on anyhow, and
half-dragged, half-coaxed him through the window and down by the ivy and the
chicken-house roof.
They stood face to face in the sloping garden and Edward's teeth chattered.
Gustus caught him by his hand, and led him away.
At the other end of the shrubbery, where[p51the rockery was, Gustus stooped and dragged out a big
clinker-then another, and another. There was a hole like a big rabbit-hole. If
Edward had really been a white rabbit it would just have fitted him.
'I'll go first,' said Gustus, and went, head-foremost.'Come on,' he said,
hollowly, from inside. And Edward, too, went. It was dreadful crawling into that
damp hole in the dark. As his head got through the hole he saw that it led to a
cave, and below him stood a dark figure. The lantern was on the ground.
'Come on,' said Gustus, 'I'll catch you if you fall.'
With a rush and a scramble Edward got in.
'It's caves,' said Gustus. 'A chap I know that goes about the country
bottoming cane-chairs,'e told me about it. And I nosed about and found he lived
here. So then I thought what a go. So now we'll put your half-shiner down and
look at it, and we'll have a gold-mine, and you can pretend to find it.'
'Halves!' said Edward, briefly and firmly.
'You're a man,' said Gustus. 'Now, then!' He led the way through a maze of
chalk caves till they came to a convenient[p52spot, which he had marked. And now Edward emptied his pockets
on the sand-he had brought all the contents of his money-box, and there was more
silver than gold, and more copper than either, and more odd rubbish than there
was anything else. You know what a boy's pockets are like. Stones and putty, and
slate-pencils and marbles-I urge in excuse that Edward was a very little boy-a
bit of plasticine, one or two bits of wood.
'No time to sort 'em,' said Gustus, and, putting the lantern in a suitable
position, he got out the glass and began to look through it at the tumbled
heap.
And the heap began to grow. It grew out sideways till it touched the walls of
the recess, and outwards till it touched the top of the recess, and then it
slowly worked out into the big cave and came nearer and nearer to the boys.
Everything grew-stones, putty, money, wood, plasticine.
Edward patted the growing mass as though it were alive and he loved it, and
Gustus said:
'Here's clothes, and beef, and bread, and tea, and coffee-and baccy-and a
good school, and me a engineer. I see it all a-growing and a-growing.'
'Hi-stop!' said Edward suddenly.
[p53] Gustus dropped the telescope. It rolled away into the
darkness.
'Now you've done it,' said Edward.
'What?' said Gustus.
'My hand,' said Edward, 'it's fast between the rock and the gold and things.
Find the glass and make it go smaller so that I can get my hand out.'
But Gustus could not find the glass. And, what is more, no one ever has found
it to this day.
'It's no good,' said Gustus, at last. 'I'll go and find your father. They
must come and dig you out of this precious Tom Tiddler's ground.'
'And they'll lag you if they see you. You said they would,' said Edward, not
at all sure what lagging was, but sure that it was something dreadful. 'Write a
letter and put it in his letter-box. They'll find it in the morning.'
'And leave you pinned by the hand all night? Likely-I don't think,'
said Gustus.
'I'd rather,' said Edward, bravely, but his voice was weak. 'I couldn't bear
you to be lagged, Gustus. I do love you so.'
'None of that,' said Gustus, sternly. 'I'll leave you the lamp; I can find my
way with matches. Keep up your pecker, and never say die.'
[p54] 'I won't,' said Edward, bravely. 'Oh, Gustus!'
That was how it happened that Edward's father was
roused from slumbers by violent shakings from an unknown hand, while an unknown
voice uttered these surprising words:-
'Edward is in the gold and silver and copper mine that we've found under your
garden. Come and get him out.'
When Edward's father was at last persuaded that Gustus was not a silly
dream-and this took some time-he got up.
He did not believe a word that Gustus said, even when Gustus added 'S'welp
me!' which he did several times.
But Edward's bed was empty-his clothes gone.
Edward's father got the gardener from next door-with, at the suggestion of
Gustus, a pick-the hole in the rockery was enlarged, and they all got in.
And when they got to the place where Edward was, there, sure enough, was
Edward, pinned by the hand between a piece of wood and a piece of rock. Neither
the father nor the gardener noticed any metal. Edward had fainted.
[p55] They got him out; a couple of strokes with the pick
released his hand, but it was bruised and bleeding.
They all turned to go, but they had not gone twenty yards before there was a
crash and a loud report like thunder, and a slow rumbling, rattling noise very
dreadful to hear.
'Get out of this quick, sir,' said the gardener;'the roof's fell in; this
part of the caves ain't safe.'
Edward was very feverish and ill for several days, during which he told his
father the whole story-of which his father did not believe a word. But he was
kind to Gustus, because Gustus was evidently fond of Edward.
When Edward was well enough to walk in the garden his father and he found
that a good deal of the shrubbery had sunk, so that the trees looked as though
they were growing in a pit.
It spoiled the look of the garden, and Edward's father decided to move the
trees to the other side.
When this was done the first tree uprooted showed a dark hollow below it. The
man is not born who will not examine and explore a dark hollow in his own
grounds. So Edward's father explored.
[p56] This is the true story of the discovery of that
extraordinary vein of silver, copper, and gold which has excited so much
interest in scientific and mining circles. Learned papers have been written
about it, learned professors have been rude to each other about it, but no one
knows how it came there except Gustus and Edward and you and me. Edward's father
is quite as ignorant as any one else, but he is much richer than most of them;
and, at any rate, he knows that it was Gustus who first told him of the
gold-mine, and who risked being lagged-arrested by the police, that is-rather
than let Edward wait till morning with his hand fast between wood and rock.
So Edward and Gustus have been to a good school, and now they are at
Winchester, and presently they will be at Oxford. And when Gustus is twenty-one
he will have half the money that came from the gold-mine. And then he and Edward
mean to start a school of their own. And the boys who are to go to it are to be
the sort of boys who go to the summer camp of the Grand Redoubt near the sea-the
kind of boy that Gustus was.
So the spy-glass will do some good after all, though it was so
unmanageable to begin with.
Perhaps it may even be found again. But[p57I rather hope it won't. It might, really, have done much more
mischief than it did-and if any one found it, it might do more yet.
There is no moral to this story, except….But no-there is no
moral.
[opp
p58]
 Quentin de Ward.
[p58] III ACCIDENTAL MAGIC; OR DON'T TELL ALL YOU KNOW
Quentin de Ward was rather a nice little boy, but
he had never been with other little boys, and that made him in some ways a
little different from other little boys. His father was in India, and he and his
mother lived in a little house in the New Forest. The house-it was a cottage
really, but even a cottage is a house, isn't it?-was very pretty and thatched
and had a porch covered with honeysuckle and ivy and white roses, and straight
red hollyhocks were trained to stand up in a row against the south wall of it.
The two lived quite alone, and as they had no one else to talk to they talked to
each other a good deal. Mrs. de Ward read a great many books, and she used to
tell Quentin about them afterwards. They were usually books about out of the way
things, for Mrs. de Ward was interested in all the things that people are not
quite sure about-the things that are hidden[p59and secret, wonderful and mysterious-the things people make
discoveries about. So that when the two were having their tea on the little
brick terrace in front of the hollyhocks, with the white cloth flapping in the
breeze, and the wasps hovering round the jam-pot, it was no uncommon thing for
Quentin to say thickly through his bread and jam:-
'I say, mother, tell me some more about Atlantis.' Or, 'Mother, tell me some
more about ancient Egypt and the little toy-boats they made for their little
boys.' Or, 'Mother, tell me about the people who think Lord Bacon wrote
Shakespeare.'
And his mother always told him as much as she thought he could understand,
and he always understood quite half of what she told him.
They always talked the things out thoroughly, and thus he learned to be fond
of arguing, and to enjoy using his brains, just as you enjoy using your muscles
in the football field or the gymnasium.
Also he came to know quite a lot of odd, out of the way things, and to have
opinions of his own concerning the lost Kingdom of Atlantis, and the Man with
the Iron Mask, the building of Stonehenge, the Pre-dynastic Egyptians, cuneiform
writings and Assyrian[p60sculptures, the Mexican pyramids and the shipping activities
of Tyre and Sidon.
Quentin did no regular lessons, such as most boys have, but he read all sorts
of books and made notes from them, in a large and straggling handwriting.
You will already have supposed that Quentin was a prig. But he wasn't, and
you would have owned this if you had seen him scampering through the greenwood
on his quiet New Forest pony, or setting snares for the rabbits that
would get into the garden and eat the precious lettuces and parsley.
Also he fished in the little streams that run through that lovely land, and shot
with a bow and arrows. And he was a very good shot too.
Besides this he collected stamps and birds'eggs and picture post-cards, and
kept guinea-pigs and bantams, and climbed trees and tore his clothes in twenty
different ways. And once he fought the grocer's boy and got licked and didn't
cry, and made friends with the grocer's boy afterwards, and got him to show him
all he knew about fighting, so you see he was really not a mug. He was ten years
old and he had enjoyed every moment of his ten years, even the sleeping ones,
because he always dreamed jolly dreams, though he could not always remember what
they were.
[p61] I tell you all this so that you may understand why he
said what he did when his mother broke the news to him.
He was sitting by the stream that ran along the end of the garden, making
bricks of the clay that the stream's banks were made of. He dried them in the
sun, and then baked them under the kitchen stove. (It is quite a good way to
make bricks-you might try it sometimes.) His mother came out, looking just as
usual, in her pink cotton gown and her pink sunbonnet; and she had a letter in
her hand.
'Hullo, boy of my heart,' she said, 'very busy?'
'Yes,' said Quentin importantly, not looking up, and going on with his work.
'I'm making stones to build Stonehenge with. You'll show me how to build it,
won't you, mother.'
'Yes, dear,' she said absently. 'Yes, if I can.'
'Of course you can,' he said, 'you can do everything.'
She sat down on a tuft of grass near him.
'Quentin dear,' she said, and something in her voice made him look up
suddenly.
'Oh, mother, what is it?' he asked.
'Daddy's been wounded,' she said; 'he's all right now, dear-don't be
frightened. Only I've got to go out to him. I shall meet him in[p62Egypt. And you must go to school in Salisbury, a very nice
school, dear, till I come back.'
'Can't I come too?' he asked.
And when he understood that he could not he went on with the bricks in
silence, with his mouth shut very tight.
After a moment he said, 'Salisbury? Then I shall see Stonehenge?'
'Yes,' said his mother, pleased that he took the news so calmly, 'you will be
sure to see Stonehenge some time.'
He stood still, looking down at the little mould of clay in his hand-so still
that his mother got up and came close to him.
'Quentin,' she said, 'darling, what is it?'
He leaned his head against her.
'I won't make a fuss,' he said, 'but you can't begin to be brave the very
first minute. Or, if you do, you can't go on being.'
And with that he began to cry, though he had not cried after the affair of
the grocer's boy.
* * * * *
The thought of school was not so terrible to Quentin as Mrs. de Ward had
thought it would be. In fact, he rather liked it, with half his mind; but the
other half didn't like it, because it meant parting from his mother who, so far,
had been his only friend. But it was exciting to be taken to Southampton, and
have[p63all sorts of new clothes bought for you, and a school trunk,
and a little polished box that locked up, to keep your money in and your gold
sleeve links, and your watch and chain when you were not wearing them.
Also the journey to Salisbury was made in a motor, which was very exciting of
course, and rather took Quentin's mind off the parting with his mother, as she
meant it should. And there was a very grand lunch at The White Hart Hotel at
Salisbury, and then, very suddenly indeed, it was good-bye, good-bye, and the
motor snorted, and hooted, and throbbed, and rushed away, and mother was gone,
and Quentin was at school.
I believe it was quite a nice school. It was in a very nice house with a
large quiet garden, and there were only about twenty boys. And the masters were
kind, and the boys no worse than other boys of their age. But Quentin hated it
from the very beginning. For when his mother had gone the Headmaster said:
'School will be out in half-an-hour; take a book, de
Ward,' and gave him Little Eric and his Friends, a mere baby
book. It was too silly. He could not read it. He saw on a shelf near him,
Smith's Antiquities, a very old friend of his, so he said: 'I'd
rather have this, please.'
[p64] 'You should say “sir” when you speak to a master,' the
Head said to him. 'Take the book by all means.' To himself the Head said, 'I
wish you joy of it, you little prig.'
When school was over, one of the boys was told to show Quentin his bed and
his locker. The matron had already unpacked his box and his pile of books was
waiting for him to carry it over.
'Golly, what a lot of books,' said Smithson minor. 'What's this?
Atlantis? Is it a jolly story?'
'It isn't a story,' said Quentin. And just then the classical master came by.
'What's that about Atlantis?' he said.
'It's a book the new chap's got,' said Smithson.
The classical master glanced at the book.
'And how much do you understand of this?'he asked, fluttering the leaves.
'Nearly all, I think,' said Quentin.
'You should say “sir” when you speak to a master,' said the classical one;
and to himself he added, 'little prig.' Then he said to Quentin: 'I am afraid
you will find yourself rather out of your element among ordinary boys.'
'I don't think so,' said Quentin calmly, adding as an afterthought 'sir.'
[p65] 'I'm glad you're so confident,' said the classical master
and went.
'My word,' said Smithson minor in a rather awed voice, 'you did answer him
back.'
'Of course I did,' said Quentin. 'Don'tyou answer when you're spoken
to?'
Smithson minor informed the interested school that the new chap was a prig,
but he had a cool cheek, and that some sport might be expected.
After supper the boys had half an hour's recreation. Quentin, who was tired,
picked up a book which a big boy had just put down. It was the Midsummer
Night's Dream.
'Hi, you kid,' said the big boy, 'don't pretend you read Shakespeare for fun.
That's simple swank, you know.'
'I don't know what swank is,' said Quentin,'but I like the
Midsummer whoever wrote it.'
'Whoever what?'
'Well,' said Quentin, 'there's a good deal to be said for its being Bacon who
wrote the plays.'
Of course that settled it. From that moment, he was called not de Ward,
which was strange enough, but Bacon. He rather liked that. But the next day it
was Pork, and the day after Pig, and that was unbearable.
He was at the bottom of his class, for he[p66knew no Latin as it is taught in schools, only odd words that
English words come from, and some Latin words that are used in science. And I
cannot pretend that his arithmetic was anything but contemptible.
The book called Atlantis had been looked at by most of the
school, and Smithson major, not nearly such an agreeable boy as his brother, hit
on a new nickname.
'Atlantic Pork's a good name for a swanker,'he said. 'You know the rotten
meat they have in Chicago.'
This was in the playground before dinner. Quentin, who had to keep his mouth
shut very tight these days, because, of course, a boy of ten cannot cry before
other chaps, shut the book he was reading and looked up.
'I won't be called that,' he said quietly.
'Who said you wouldn't?' said Smithson major, who, after all, was only
twelve. 'I say you will.'
'If you call me that I shall hit you,' said Quentin, 'as hard as I can.'
A roar of laughter went up, and cries of,'Poor old Smithson'-'Apologise,
Smithie, and leave the omnibus.'
'And what should I be
doing while you were hitting me?' asked Smithson contemptuously.
[opp
p67]
 It landed on the point of the chin of Smithson
major.
[p67] 'I don't know and I don't care,' said Quentin.
Smithson looked round. No master was in sight. It seemed an excellent
opportunity to teach young de
Ward his place.
'Atlantic pig-swine,' he said very deliberately. And Quentin sprang at him,
and instantly it was a fight.
Now Quentin had only once fought-really fought-before. Then it was the
grocer's boy and he had been beaten. But he had learned something since. And the
chief conclusion he now drew from his memories of that fight was that he had not
hit half hard enough, an opinion almost universal among those who have fought
and not won.
As the fist of Smithson major described a half circle and hurt his ear very
much, Quentin suddenly screwed himself up and hit out with his right hand,
straight, and with his whole weight behind the blow as the grocer's boy had
shown him. All his grief for his wounded father, his sorrow at the parting from
his mother, all his hatred of his school, and his contempt for his schoolfellows
went into that blow. It landed on the point of the chin of Smithson major who
fell together like a heap of rags.
'Oh,' said Quentin, gazing with interest at his hand-it hurt a good deal but
he[p68looked at it with respect-'I'm afraid I've hurt him.'
He had forgotten for a moment that he was in an enemies' country, and so,
apparently, had his enemies.
'Well done, Piggy! Bravo, young 'un! Well hit, by Jove!'
Friendly hands thumped him on the back. Smithson major was no popular
hero.
Quentin felt-as his schoolfellows would have put it-bucked. It is one thing
to be called Pig in enmity and derision. Another to be called Piggy-an
affectionate diminutive, after all-to the chorus of admiring smacks.
'Get up, Smithie,' cried the ring. 'Want any more?'
It appeared that Smithie did not want any more. He lay, not moving at all,
and very white.
'I say,' the crowd's temper veered, 'you've killed him, I expect. I wouldn't
like to be you, Bacon.'
Pig, you notice, for aggravation-Piggy in enthusiastic applause. In the
moment of possible tragedy the more formal Bacon.
'I haven't,' said Quentin, very white himself,'but if I have he began-by
calling names.'
Smithson moved and grunted. A sigh of[p69relief
swept the ring as a breeze sweeps a cornfield.
'He's all right. A fair knock out. Piggy's got the use of 'em. Do Smithie
good.' The voices hushed suddenly. A master was on the scene-the classical
master.
'Fighting?' he said. 'The new boy? Who began it?'
'I did,' said Quentin, 'but he began with calling names.'
'Sneak!' murmured the entire school, and Quentin, who had seen no reason for
not speaking the truth, perceived that one should not tell all one knows, and
that once more he stood alone in the world.
'You will go to your room, de
Ward,' said the classical master, bending over Smithson, who having been
'knocked silly' still remained in that condition, 'and the headmaster will
consider your case to-morrow. You will probably be expelled.'
Quentin went to his room and thought over his position. It seemed to be
desperate. How was he to know that the classical master was even then saying to
the Head:
'He's got something in him, prig or no prig, sir.'
'You were quite right to send him to his room,' said the Head, 'discipline
must be[p70maintained, as Mr. Ducket says. But it will do Smithson major
a world of good. A boy who reads Shakespeare for fun, and has views about
Atlantis, and can knock out a bully as well…. He'll be a power in the school.
But we mustn't let him know it.'
That was rather a pity. Because Quentin, furious at the injustice of the
whole thing-Smithson, the aggressor, consoled with; himself punished; expulsion
threatened-was maturing plans.
'If mother had known what it was like,' he said to himself, 'she would never
have left me here. I've got the two pounds she gave me. I shall go to the White
Hart at Salisbury… no, they'd find me then. I'll go to Lyndhurst; and write to
her. It's better to run away than to be expelled. Quentin Durward would never
have waited to be expelled from anywhere.'
Of course Quentin Durward was my hero's hero. It could not be otherwise since
his own name was so like that of the Scottish guardsman.
Now the school in Salisbury was a little school for little boys-boys who were
used to schools and took the rough with the smooth. But Quentin was not used to
schools, and he had taken the rough very much to heart. So[p71much
that he did not mean to take any more of it.
His dinner was brought up on a tray-bread and water. He put the bread in his
pocket. Then when he knew that every one was at dinner in the long dining-room
at the back of the house, he just walked very quietly down the stairs, opened
the side door and marched out, down the garden path and out at the tradesmen's
gate. He knew better than to shut either gate or door.
He went quickly down the street, turned the first corner he came to so as to
get out of sight of the school. He turned another corner, went through an
archway, and found himself in an inn-yard-very quiet indeed. Only a
liver-coloured lurcher dog wagged a sleepy tail on the hot flag-stones.
Quentin was just turning to go back through the arch, for there was no other
way out of the yard, when he saw a big covered cart, whose horse wore a nose-bag
and looked as if there was no hurry. The cart bore the name, 'Miles, Carrier,
Lyndhurst.'
Quentin knew all about lifts. He had often begged them and got them. Now
there was no one to ask. But he felt he could very well explain later that he
had wanted a lift, much better than now, in fact, when he might be[p72caught at any moment by some one from the school.
He climbed up by the shaft. There were boxes and packages of all sorts in the
cart, and at the back an empty crate with sacking over it. He got into the
crate, pulled the sacking over himself, and settled down to eat his bread.
Presently the carrier came out, and there was talk, slow, long-drawn talk.
After a long while the cart shook to the carrier's heavy climb into it, the
harness rattled, the cart lurched, and the wheels were loud and bumpy over the
cobble stones of the yard.
Quentin felt safe. The glow of anger was still hot in him, and he was glad to
think how they would look for him all over the town, in vain. He lifted the
sacking at one corner so that he could look out between the canvas of the cart's
back and side, and hoped to see the classical master distractedly looking for
him. But the streets were very sleepy. Every one in Salisbury was having
dinner-or in the case of the affluent, lunch.
The black horse seemed as sleepy as the streets, and went very slowly. Also
it stopped very often, and wherever there were parcels to leave there was slow,
long talkings to be exchanged. I think, perhaps, Quentin dozed a good deal under
his sacks. At any rate it was[p73with a
shock of surprise that he suddenly heard the carrier's voice saying, as the
horse stopped with a jerk:
'There's a crate for you, Mrs. Baddock, returned empty,' and knew that that
crate was not empty, but full-full of boy.
'I'll go and call Joe,' said a voice-Mrs. Baddock's, Quentin supposed, and
slow feet stumped away over stones. Mr. Miles leisurely untied the tail of the
cart, ready to let the crate be taken out.
Quentin spent a paralytic moment. What could he do?
And then, luckily or unluckily, a reckless motor tore past, and the black
horse plunged and Mr. Miles had to go to its head and 'talk pretty' to it for a
minute. And in that minute Quentin lifted the sacking, and looked out. It was
low sunset, and the street was deserted. He stepped out of the crate, dropped to
the ground, and slipped behind a stout and friendly water-butt that seemed to
offer protective shelter.
Joe came, and the crate was taken down.
'You haven't seen nothing of that there runaway boy by chance?' said a new
voice-Joe's no doubt.
'What boy?' said Mr. Miles.
'Run away from school, Salisbury,' said[p74Joe. 'Telegrams far and near, so they be. Little varmint.'
'I ain't seen no boys, not more'n ordinary,'said Mr. Miles. 'Thick as flies
they be, here, there, and everywhere, drat 'em. Sixpence-Correct. So long,
Joe.'
The cart rattled away. Joe and the crate blundered out of hearing, and
Quentin looked cautiously round the water-butt.
This was an adventure. But he was cooler now than he had been at starting-his
hot anger had died down. He would have been contented, he could not help
feeling, with a less adventurous adventure.
But he was in for it now. He felt, as I suppose people feel when they jump
off cliffs with parachutes, that return was impossible.
Hastily turning his school cap inside out-the only disguise he could think
of, he emerged from the water-butt seclusion and into the street, trying to look
as if there was no reason why he should not be there. He did not know the
village. It was not Lyndhurst. And of course asking the way was not to be
thought of.
There was a piece of sacking lying on the road; it must have dropped from the
carrier's cart. He picked it up and put it over his shoulders.
'A deeper disguise,' he said, and walked on.
[p75] He walked steadily for a long, long way as it seemed, and
the world got darker and darker. But he kept on. Surely he must presently come
to some village, or some signpost.
Anyhow, whatever happened, he could not go back. That was the one certain
thing. The broad stretches of country to right and left held no shapes of
houses, no glimmer of warm candle-light; they were bare and bleak, only broken
by circles of trees that stood out like black islands in the misty grey of the
twilight.
'I shall have to sleep behind a hedge,' he said bravely enough; but there did
not seem to be any hedges. And then, quite suddenly, he came upon it.
A scattered building, half transparent as it seemed, showing black against
the last faint pink and primrose of the sunset. He stopped, took a few steps off
the road on short, crisp turf that rose in a gentle slope. And at the end of a
dozen paces he knew it. Stonehenge! Stonehenge he had always wanted so
desperately to see. Well, he saw it now, more or less.
He stopped to think. He knew that Stonehenge stands all alone on Salisbury
Plain. He was very tired. His mother had told him[p76about a girl in a book who slept all night on the altar stone
at Stonehenge. So it was a thing that people did-to sleep there. He was not
afraid, as you or I might have been-of that lonely desolate ruin of a temple of
long ago. He was used to the forest, and, compared with the forest, any building
is homelike.
There was just enough light left amid the stones of the wonderful broken
circle to guide him to its centre. As he went his hand brushed a plant; he
caught at it, and a little group of flowers came away in his hand.
'St. John's wort,' he said, 'that's the magic flower.' And he remembered that
it is only magic when you pluck it on Midsummer Eve.
'And this is Midsummer Eve,' he told himself, and put it in his
buttonhole.
'I don't know where the altar stone is,' he said, 'but that looks a cosy
little crack between those two big stones.'
He crept into it, and lay down on a flat stone that stretched between and
under two fallen pillars.
The night was soft and warm; it was Midsummer Eve.
'Mother isn't going till the twenty-sixth,' he told himself. 'I sha'n't
bother about hotels. I shall send her a telegram in the morning, and get a
carriage at the nearest stables and go[p77straight back to her. No, she won't be angry when she hears
all about it. I'll ask her to let me go to sea instead of to school. It's much
more manly. Much more manly … much much more, much.'
He was asleep. And the wild west wind that swept across the plain spared the
little corner where he lay asleep, curled up in his sacking with the inside-out
school cap, doubled twice, for pillow.
He fell asleep on the smooth, solid, steady stone.
He awoke on the stone in a world that rocked as sea-boats rock on a choppy
sea.
He went to sleep between fallen moveless pillars of a ruin older than any
world that history knows.
He awoke in the shade of a purple awning through which strong sunlight
filtered, and purple curtains that flapped and strained in the wind; and there
was a smell, a sweet familiar smell, of tarred ropes and the sea.
'I say,' said Quentin to himself, 'here's a rum go.'
He had learned that expression in a school in Salisbury, a long time ago as
it seemed.
The stone on which he lay dipped and rose to a rhythm which he knew well
enough. He had felt it when he and his mother went in a[p78little
boat from Keyhaven to Alum Bay in the Isle of Wight. There was no doubt in his
mind. He was on a ship. But how, but why? Who could have carried him all that
way without waking him? Was it magic? Accidental magic? The St. John's wort
perhaps? And the stone-it was not the same. It was new, clean cut, and, where
the wind displaced a corner of the curtain, dazzlingly white in the
sunlight.
There was the pat pat of bare feet on the deck, a dull sort of shuffling as
though people were arranging themselves. And then people outside the awning
began to sing. It was a strange song, not at all like any music you or I have
ever heard. It had no tune, no more tune than a drum has, or a trumpet, but it
had a sort of wild rough glorious exciting splendour about it, and gave you the
sort of intense all-alive feeling that drums and trumpets give.
Quentin lifted a corner of the purple curtain and looked out.
Instantly the song stopped, drowned in the deepest silence Quentin had ever
imagined. It was only broken by the flip-flapping of the sheets against the
masts of the ship. For it was a ship, Quentin saw that as the bulwark dipped to
show him an unending waste of sea, broken by bigger waves than he had ever[p79dreamed of. He saw also a crowd of men, dressed in white and
blue and purple and gold. Their right arms were raised towards the sun, half of
whose face showed across the sea-but they seemed to be, as my old nurse used to
say, 'struck so,' for their eyes were not fixed on the sun, but on Quentin. And
not in anger, he noticed curiously, but with surprise and… could it be that they
were afraid of him?
[opp
p79]
 'Who are you?' he said. 'Answer, I adjure you by
the sacred Tau!'
Quentin was shivering with the surprise and newness of it all. He had read
about magic, but he had not wholly believed in it, and yet, now, if this was not
magic, what was it? You go to sleep on an old stone in a ruin. You wake on the
same stone, quite new, on a ship. Magic, magic, if ever there was magic in this
wonderful, mysterious world!
The silence became awkward. Some one had to say something.
'Good-morning,' said Quentin, feeling that he ought perhaps to be the
one.
Instantly every one in sight fell on his face on the deck.
Only one, a tall man with a black beard and a blue mantle, stood up and
looked Quentin in the eyes.
'Who are you?' he said. 'Answer, I adjure you by the Sacred Tau!' Now this
was very odd, and Quentin could never understand[p80it, but when this man spoke Quentin understood him
perfectly, and yet at the same time he knew that the man was speaking a foreign
language. So that his thought was not, 'Hullo, you speak English!' but 'Hullo, I
can understand your language.'
'I am Quentin de
Ward,' he said.
'A name from other stars! How came you here?' asked the blue-mantled man.
'I don't know,' said Quentin.
'He does not know. He did not sail with us. It is by magic that he is here,'
said Blue Mantle. 'Rise, all, and greet the Chosen of the Gods.'
They rose from the deck, and Quentin saw that they were all bearded men, with
bright, earnest eyes, dressed in strange dress of something like jersey and
tunic and heavy golden ornaments.
'Hail! Chosen of the Gods,' cried Blue Mantle, who seemed to be the
leader.
'Hail, Chosen of the Gods!' echoed the rest.
'Thank you very much, I'm sure,' said Quentin.
'And what is this stone?' asked Blue Mantle, pointing to the stone on which
Quentin sat.
And Quentin, anxious to show off his knowledge, said:
[p81] 'I'm not quite sure, but I think it's the altar
stone of Stonehenge.'
'It is proved,' said Blue Mantle. 'Thou art the Chosen of the Gods. Is there
anything my Lord needs?' he added humbly.
'I … I'm rather hungry,' said Quentin;'it's a long time since dinner, you
know.'
They brought him bread and bananas, and oranges.
'Take,' said Blue Mantle, 'of the fruits of the earth, and specially of this,
which gives drink and meat and ointment to man,' suddenly offering a large
cocoa-nut.
Quentin took, with appropriate 'Thank you's' and 'You're very kind's.'
'Nothing,' said Blue Mantle, 'is too good for the Chosen of the Gods. All
that we have is yours, to the very last day of your life you have only to
command, and we obey. You will like to eat in seclusion. And afterwards you will
let us behold the whole person of the Chosen of the Gods.'
Quentin retired into the purple tent, with the fruits and the cocoa-nut. As
you know, a cocoa-nut is not handy to get at the inside of, at the best of
times, so Quentin set that aside, meaning to ask Blue Mantle later on for a
gimlet and a hammer.
When he had had enough to eat he peeped[p82out again. Blue Mantle was on the watch and came quickly
forward.
'Now,' said he, very crossly indeed, 'tell me how you got here. This Chosen
of the Gods business is all very well for the vulgar. But you and I know that
there is no such thing as magic.'
'Speak for yourself,' said Quentin. 'If I'm not here by magic I'm not here at
all.'
'Yes, you are,' said Blue Mantle.
'I know I am,' said Quentin, 'but if I'm not here by magic what am I here
by?'
'Stowawayishness,' said Blue Mantle.
'If you think that why don't you treat me as a stowaway?'
'Because of public opinion,' said Blue Mantle, rubbing his nose in an angry
sort of perplexedness.
'Very well,' said Quentin, who was feeling so surprised and bewildered that
it was a real relief to him to bully somebody. 'Now look here. I came here by
magic, accidental magic. I belong to quite a different world from yours. But
perhaps you are right about my being the Chosen of the Gods. And I sha'n't tell
you anything about my world. But I command you, by the Sacred Tau' (he had been
quick enough to catch and remember the word), 'to tell me who you are, and[p83where you come from, and where you are going.'
Blue Mantle shrugged his shoulders. 'Oh, well,' he said, 'if you invoke the
sacred names of Power…. But I don't call it fair play. Especially as you know
perfectly well, and just want to browbeat me into telling lies. I shall not tell
lies. I shall tell you the truth.'
'I hoped you would,' said Quentin gently.
'Well then,' said Blue Mantle, 'I am a Priest of Poseidon, and I come from
the great and immortal kingdom of Atlantis.'
'From the temple where the gold statue is, with the twelve sea-horses in
gold?' Quentin asked eagerly.
'Ah, I knew you knew all about it,' said Blue Mantle, 'so I don't need to
tell you that I am taking the sacred stone, on which you are sitting (profanely
if you are a mere stowaway, and not the Chosen of the Gods) to complete the
splendid structure of a temple built on a great plain in the second of the
islands which are our colonies in the North East.'
'Tell me all about Atlantis,' said Quentin. And the priest, protesting that
Quentin knew as much about it as he did, told.
And all the time the ship was ploughing through the waves, sometimes sailing,
sometimes[p84rowed by hidden rowers with long
oars. And Quentin was served in all things as though he had been a king. If he
had insisted that he was not the Chosen of the Gods everything might have been
different. But he did not. And he was very anxious to show how much he knew
about Atlantis. And sometimes he was wrong, the Priest said, but much more often
he was right.
'We are less than three days' journey now from the Eastern Isles,' Blue
Mantle said one day, 'and I warn you that if you are a mere stowaway you had
better own it. Because if you persist in calling yourself the Chosen of the Gods
you will be expected to act as such-to the very end.'
'I don't call myself anything,' said Quentin,'though I am not a stowaway,
anyhow, and I don't know how I came here-so of course it was magic. It's simply
silly your being so cross. I can't help being here. Let's be
friends.'
'Well,' said Blue Mantle, much less crossly,'I never believed in magic,
though I am a priest, but if it is, it is. We may as well be friends,
as you call it. It isn't for very long, anyway,' he added mysteriously.
[opp
p85]
 The cart was drawn by an enormous creature, more
like an elephant than anything else.
And then to show his friendliness he took Quentin all over the ship, and
explained it all to[p85him.
And Quentin enjoyed himself thoroughly, though every now and then he had to
pinch himself to make sure that he was awake. And he was fed well all the time,
and all the time made much of, so that when the ship reached land he was quite
sorry. The ship anchored by a stone quay, most solid and serviceable, and every
one was very busy.
Quentin kept out of sight behind the purple curtains. The sailors and the
priests and the priests' attendants and everybody on the boat had asked him so
many questions, and been so curious about his clothes, that he was not anxious
to hear any more questions asked, or to have to invent answers to them.
And after a very great deal of talk-almost as much as Mr. Miles's carrying
had needed-the altar stone was lifted, Quentin, curtains, awning and all, and
carried along a gangway to the shore, and there it was put on a sort of cart,
more like what people in Manchester call a lurry than anything else I can think
of. The wheels were made of solid circles of wood bound round with copper. And
the cart was drawn
by-not horses or donkeys or oxen or even dogs-but by an enormous creature more
like an elephant than anything else, only it had long hair rather like the hair
worn by goats.
[p86] You, perhaps, would not have known what this vast
creature was, but Quentin, who had all sorts of out-of-the-way information
packed in his head, knew at once that it was a mammoth.
And by that he knew, too, that he had slipped back many thousands of years,
because, of course, it is a very long time indeed since there were any mammoths
alive, and able to draw lurries. And the car and the priest and the priest's
retinue and the stone and Quentin and the mammoth journeyed slowly away from the
coast, passing through great green forests and among strange gray mountains.
Where were they journeying?
Quentin asked the same question you may be sure, and Blue Mantle told
him-
'To Stonehenge.' And Quentin understood him perfectly, though Stonehenge was
not the word Blue Mantle used, or anything like it.
'The great temple is now complete,' he said, 'all but the altar stone. It
will be the most wonderful temple ever built in any of the colonies of Atlantis.
And it will be consecrated on the longest day of the year.'
'Midsummer Day,' said Quentin thoughtlessly-and, as usual, anxious to tell
all he knew. 'I know. The sun strikes through the arch on to the altar stone at
sunrise.[p87Hundreds of people go to see it:
the ruins are quite crowded sometimes, I believe.'
'Ruins?' said the priest in a terrible voice.'Crowded? Ruins?'
'I mean,' said Quentin hastily, 'the sun will still shine the same way even
when the temple is in ruins, won't it?'
'The temple,' said the priest, 'is built to defy time. It will never be in
ruins.'
'That's all you know,' said Quentin, not very politely.
'It is not by any means all I know,' said the priest. 'I do not tell all I
know. Nor do you.'
'I used to,' said Quentin, 'but I sha'n't any more. It only leads to
trouble-I see that now.'
Now, though Quentin had been intensely interested in everything he had seen
in the ship and on the journey, you may be sure he had not lost sight of the
need there was to get back out of this time of Atlantis into his own time. He
knew that he must have got into these Atlantean times by some very simple
accidental magic, and he felt no doubt that he should get back in the same way.
He felt almost sure that the reverse-action, so to speak, of the magic would
begin when the stone got back to the place where it had lain for so many[p88thousand years before he happened to go to sleep on it, and to
start-perhaps by the St. John's wort-the accidental magic. If only, when he got
back there he could think of the compelling, the magic word!
And now the slow procession wound over the downs, and far away across the
plain, which was almost just the same then as it is now, Quentin saw what he
knew must be Stonehenge. But it was no longer the grey pile of ruins that you
have perhaps seen-or have, at any rate, seen pictures of.
From afar one could see the gleam of yellow gold and red copper; the flutter
of purple curtains, the glitter and dazzle of shimmering silver.
As they drew near to the spot Quentin perceived that the great stones he
remembered were overlaid with ornamental work, with vivid, bright-coloured
paintings. The whole thing was a great circular building, every stone in its
place. At a mile or two distant lay a town. And in that town, with every
possible luxury, served with every circumstance of servile homage, Quentin ate
and slept.
I wish I had time to tell you what that town was like where he slept and ate,
but I have not. You can read for yourself, some day, what Atlantis was like.
Plato tells us a good[p89deal,
and the Colonies of Atlantis must have had at least a reasonable second-rate
copy of the cities of that fair and lovely land.
That night, for the first time since he had first gone to sleep on the altar
stone, Quentin slept apart from it. He lay on a wooden couch strewn with soft
bear-skins, and a woollen coverlet was laid over him. And he slept soundly.
In the middle of the night, as it seemed, Blue Mantle woke him.
'Come,' he said, 'Chosen of the Gods-since you will be that, and no
stowaway-the hour draws nigh.'
The mammoth was waiting. Quentin and Blue Mantle rode on its back to the
outer porch of the new temple of Stonehenge. Rows of priests and attendants,
robed in white and blue and purple, formed a sort of avenue up which Blue Mantle
led the Chosen of the Gods, who was Quentin. They took off his jacket and put a
white dress on him, rather like a night-shirt without sleeves. And they put a
thick wreath of London Pride on his head and another, larger and longer, round
his neck.
'If only the chaps at school could see me now!' he said to himself
proudly.
And by this time it was gray dawn.
'Lie down now,' said Blue Mantle, 'lie[p90down, O Beloved of the Gods, upon the altar stone, for the
last time.'
'I shall be able to go, then?' Quentin asked. This accidental magic was, he
perceived, a tricky thing, and he wanted to be sure.
'You will not be able to stay,' said the priest. 'If going is what you
desire, the desire of the Chosen of the Gods is fully granted.'
The grass on the plain far and near rustled with the tread of many feet; the
cold air of dawn thrilled to the awed murmured of many voices.
Quentin lay down, with his pink wreaths and his white robe, and watched the
quickening pinkiness of the East. And slowly the great circle of the temple
filled with white-robed folk, all carrying in their hands the faint pinkiness of
the flowers which we nowadays call London Pride.
And all eyes were fixed on the arch through which, at sunrise on Midsummer
Day, the sun's first beam should fall upon the white, new, clean altar stone.
The stone is still there, after all these thousands of years, and at sunrise on
Midsummer Day the sun's first ray still falls on it.
[opp
p91]
 'Silence,' cried the priest. 'Chosen of the
Immortals, close your eyes!'
The sky grew lighter and lighter, and at last the sun peered redly over the
down, and[p91the first ray of the morning
sunlight fell full on the altar stone and on the face of Quentin.
And, as it did so, a very tall, white-robed priest with a deer-skin apron and
a curious winged head-dress stepped forward. He carried a great bronze knife,
and he waved it ten times in the shaft of sunlight that shot through the arch
and on to the altar stone.
'Thus,' he cried, 'thus do I bathe the sacred blade in the pure fountain of
all light, all wisdom, all splendour. In the name of the ten kings, the ten
virtues, the ten hopes, the ten fears I make my weapon clean! May this temple of
our love and our desire endure for ever, so long as the glory of our Lord the
Sun is shed upon this earth. May the sacrifice I now humbly and proudly offer be
acceptable to the gods by whom it has been so miraculously provided. Chosen of
the Gods! return to the gods who sent thee!'
A roar of voices rang through the temple. The bronze knife was raised over
Quentin. He could not believe that this, this horror, was the end of all these
wonderful happenings.
'No-no,' he cried, 'it's not true. I'm not the Chosen of the Gods! I'm only a
little boy that's got here by accidental magic!'
'Silence,' cried the priest, 'Chosen of the Immortals, close your eyes! It
will not hurt.[p92This life is only a dream; the
other life is the real life. Be strong, be brave!'
Quentin was not brave. But he shut his eyes. He could not help it. The
glitter of the bronze knife in the sunlight was too strong for him.
He could not believe that this could really have happened to him. Every one
had been so kind-so friendly to him. And it was all for this!
Suddenly a sharp touch at his side told him that for this, indeed, it had all
been. He felt the point of the knife.
'Mother!' he cried. And opened his eyes again.
He always felt quite sure afterwards that'Mother' was the master-word, the
spell of spells. For when he opened his eyes there was no priest, no white-robed
worshippers, no splendour of colour and metal, no Chosen of the Gods, no
knife-only a little boy with a piece of sacking over him, damp with the night
dews, lying on a stone amid the grey ruins of Stonehenge, and, all about him, a
crowd of tourists who had come to see the sun's first shaft strike the age-old
altar of Stonehenge on Midsummer Day in the morning. And instead of a knife
point at his side there was only the ferrule of the umbrella of an elderly and
retired tea merchant in a mackintosh and an Alpine[p93hat,-a ferrule which had prodded the sleeping boy so
unexpectedly surprised on the very altar stone where the sun's ray now
lingered.
And then, in a moment, he knew that he had not uttered the spell in vain, the
word of compelling, the word of power: for his mother was there kneeling beside
him. I am sorry to say that he cried as he clung to her. Wecannot all
of us be brave, always.
The tourists were very kind and interested, and the tea merchant insisted on
giving Quentin something out of a flask, which was so nasty that Quentin only
pretended to drink, out of politeness. His mother had a carriage waiting, and
they escaped to it while the tourists were saying, 'How romantic!' and asking
each other whatever in the world had happened.
* * * * *
'But how did you come to be there, darling?' said his mother with
warm hands comfortingly round him. 'I've been looking for you all night. I went
to say good-bye to you yesterday-Oh, Quentin-and I found you'd run away. How
could you?'
'I'm sorry,' said Quentin, 'if it worried you, I'm sorry. Very, very. I was
going to telegraph to-day.'
'But where have you been? What have you been doing all night?' she asked,
caressing him.
[p94] 'Is it only one night?' said Quentin. 'I don't know
exactly what's happened. It was accidental magic, I think, mother. I'm glad I
thought of the right word to get back, though.' And then he told her all about
it. She held him very tightly and let him talk.
Perhaps she thought that a little boy to whom accidental magic happened all
in a minute, like that, was not exactly the right little boy for that excellent
school in Salisbury. Anyhow she took him to Egypt with her to meet his father,
and, on the way, they happened to see a doctor in London who said: 'Nerves'
which is a poor name for accidental magic, and Quentin does not believe it means
the same thing at all.
Quentin's father is well now, and he has left the army, and father and mother
and Quentin live in a jolly, little, old house in Salisbury, and Quentin is a
'day boy' at that very same school. He and Smithson minor are the greatest of
friends. But he has never told Smithson minor about the accidental magic. He has
learned now, and learned very thoroughly, that it is not always wise to tell all
you know. If he had not owned that he knew that it was the Stonehenge altar
stone!
* * * * *
[p95] You may think that the accidental magic was all a dream,
and that Quentin dreamed it because his mother had told him so much about
Atlantis. But then, how do you account for his dreaming so much that his mother
had never told him? You think that that part wasn't true, well, it may have been
true for anything I know. And I am sure you don't know more about it than I
do.
[p96] IV THE PRINCESS AND THE HEDGE-PIG
'But I don't see what we're to do' said
the Queen for the twentieth time.
'Whatever we do will end in misfortune,'said the King gloomily; 'you'll see
it will.'
They were sitting in the honeysuckle arbour talking things over, while the
nurse walked up and down the terrace with the new baby in her arms.
'Yes, dear,' said the poor Queen; 'I've not the slightest doubt I shall.'
Misfortune comes in many ways, and you can't always know beforehand that a
certain way is the way misfortune will come by: but there are things misfortune
comes after as surely as night comes after day. For instance, if you let all the
water boil away, the kettle will have a hole burnt in it. If you leave the bath
taps running and the waste-pipe closed,[p97the
stairs of your house will, sooner or later, resemble Niagara. If you leave your
purse at home, you won't have it with you when you want to pay your tram-fare.
And if you throw lighted wax matches at your muslin curtains, your parent will
most likely have to pay five pounds to the fire engines for coming round and
blowing the fire out with a wet hose. Also if you are a king and do not invite
the wicked fairy to your christening parties, she will come all the same. And if
you do ask the wicked fairy, she will come, and in either case it will be the
worse for the new princess. So what is a poor monarch to do? Of course there is
one way out of the difficulty, and that is not to have a christening party at
all. But this offends all the good fairies, and then where are you?
All these reflections had presented themselves to the minds of King
Ozymandias and his Queen, and neither of them could deny that they were in a
most awkward situation. They were 'talking it over' for the hundredth time on
the palace terrace where the pomegranates and oleanders grew in green tubs and
the marble balustrade is overgrown with roses, red and white and pink and
yellow. On the lower terrace the royal nurse was walking up and down with the
baby princess that all[p98the
fuss was about. The Queen's eyes followed the baby admiringly.
'The darling!' she said. 'Oh, Ozymandias, don't you sometimes wish we'd been
poor people?'
'Never!' said the King decidedly.
'Well, I do,' said the Queen; 'then we could have had just you and me and
your sister at the christening, and no fear of-oh! I've thought of
something.'
The King's patient expression showed that he did not think it likely that she
would have thought of anything useful; but at the first five words his
expression changed. You would have said that he pricked up his ears, if kings
had ears that could be pricked up. What she said was-
'Let's have a secret christening.'
'How?' asked the King.
The Queen was gazing in the direction of the baby with what is called a 'far
away look'in her eyes.
'Wait a minute,' she said slowly. 'I see it all-yes-we'll have the party in
the cellars-you know they're splendid.'
'My great-grandfather had them built by Lancashire men, yes,' interrupted the
King.
[opp
p98]
 On the lower terrace the royal nurse was walking up
and down with the baby princess that all the fuss was about.
'We'll send out the invitations to look like bills. The baker's boy can take
them. He's[p99a very nice boy. He made baby
laugh yesterday when I was explaining to him about the Standard Bread. We'll
just put “1 loaf 3. A remittance at your earliest convenience will oblige.”
That'll mean that 1 person is invited for 3 o'clock, and on the back we'll write
where and why in invisible ink. Lemon juice, you know. And the baker's boy shall
be told to ask to see the people-just as they do when theyreally mean
earliest convenience-and then he shall just whisper: “Deadly secret. Lemon
juice. Hold it to the fire,” and come away. Oh, dearest, do say you
approve!'
The King laid down his pipe, set his crown straight, and kissed the Queen
with great and serious earnestness.
'You are a wonder,' he said. 'It is the very thing. But the baker's boy is
very small. Can we trust him?'
'He is nine,' said the Queen, 'and I have sometimes thought that he must be a
prince in disguise. He is so very intelligent.'
The Queen's plan was carried out. The cellars, which were really
extraordinarily fine, were secretly decorated by the King's confidential man and
the Queen's confidential maid and a few of their confidential friends
whom they knew they could really trust. You would never have thought they were
[p100cellars when the decorations were finished. The walls were
hung with white satin and white velvet, with wreaths of white roses, and the
stone floors were covered with freshly cut turf with white daisies, brisk and
neat, growing in it.
The invitations were duly delivered by the baker's boy. On them was written
in plain blue ink,
'The Royal Bakeries 1 loaf
3d. An early remittance will oblige.'
And when the people held the letter to the fire, as they were whisperingly
instructed to do by the baker's boy, they read in a faint brown writing:-
'King Ozymandias and Queen Eliza invite you to the christening of their
daughter Princess Ozyliza at three on Wednesday in the Palace cellars.
'P.S.-We are obliged to be very secret and careful because of wicked
fairies, so please come disguised as a tradesman with a bill, calling for the
last time before it leaves your hands.'
You will understand by this that the King and Queen were not as well off as
they could wish; so that tradesmen calling at the palace with that sort of
message was the last thing[p101likely to excite remark. But as most of the King's subjects
were not very well off either, this was merely a bond between the King and his
people. They could sympathise with each other, and understand each other's
troubles in a way impossible to most kings and most nations.
You can imagine the excitement in the families of the people who were invited
to the christening party, and the interest they felt in their costumes. The Lord
Chief Justice disguised himself as a shoemaker; he still had his old blue
brief-bag by him, and a brief-bag and a boot-bag are very much alike. The
Commander-in-Chief dressed as a dog's meat man and wheeled a barrow. The Prime
Minister appeared as a tailor; this required no change of dress and only a
slight change of expression. And the other courtiers all disguised themselves
perfectly. So did the good fairies, who had, of course, been invited first of
all. Benevola, Queen of the Good Fairies, disguised herself as a moonbeam, which
can go into any palace and no questions asked. Serena, the next in command,
dressed as a butterfly, and all the other fairies had disguises equally pretty
and tasteful.
The Queen looked most kind and beautiful, the King very handsome and manly,
and all[p102the guests agreed that the new princess was the most beautiful
baby they had ever seen in all their born days.
Everybody brought the most charming christening presents concealed beneath
their disguises. The fairies gave the usual gifts, beauty, grace, intelligence,
charm, and so on.
Everything seemed to be going better than well. But of course you know it
wasn't. The Lord High Admiral had not been able to get a cook's dress large
enough completely to cover his uniform; a bit of an epaulette had peeped out,
and the wicked fairy, Malevola, had spotted it as he went past her to the palace
back door, near which she had been sitting disguised as a dog without a collar
hiding from the police, and enjoying what she took to be the trouble the royal
household were having with their tradesmen.
Malevola almost jumped out of her dog-skin when she saw the glitter of that
epaulette.
'Hullo?' she said, and sniffed quite like a dog. 'I must look into this,'
said she, and disguising herself as a toad, she crept unseen into the pipe by
which the copper emptied itself into the palace moat-for of course there was a
copper in one of the palace cellars as there always is in cellars in the North
Country.
Now this copper had been a great trial to[p103the decorators. If there is
anything you don't like about your house, you can either try to conceal it or
'make a feature of it.' And as concealment of the copper was impossible, it was
decided to 'make it a feature' by covering it with green moss and planting a
tree in it, a little apple tree all in bloom. It had been very much admired.
Malevola, hastily altering her disguise to that of a mole, dug her way
through the earth that the copper was full of, got to the top and put out a
sharp nose just as Benevola was saying in that soft voice which Malevola always
thought so affected,-
'The Princess shall love and be loved all her life long.'
'So she shall,' said the wicked fairy, assuming her own shape amid the
screams of the audience. 'Be quiet, you silly cuckoo,' she said to the Lord
Chamberlain, whose screams were specially piercing, 'or I'll give you a
christening present too.'
Instantly there was a dreadful silence. Only Queen Eliza, who had caught up
the baby at Malevola's first word, said feebly,-
'Oh, don't, dear Malevola.'
And the King said, 'It isn't exactly a party, don't you know. Quite informal.
Just a few friends dropped in, eh, what?'
[p104] 'So I perceive,' said Malevola, laughing that dreadful
laugh of hers which makes other people feel as though they would never be able
to laugh any more. 'Well, I've dropped
in too. Let's have a look at the child.'
The poor Queen dared not refuse. She tottered forward with the baby in her
arms.
'Humph!' said Malevola, 'your precious daughter will have beauty and grace
and all the rest of the tuppenny halfpenny rubbish those niminy-piminy minxes
have given her. But she will be turned out of her kingdom. She will have to face
her enemies without a single human being to stand by her, and she shall never
come to her own again until she finds--'Malevola
hesitated. She could not think of anything sufficiently unlikely-'until she
finds,'she repeated--
'A thousand spears to follow her to battle,'said a new voice, 'a thousand
spears devoted to her and to her alone.'
A very young fairy fluttered down from the little apple tree where she had
been hiding among the pink and white blossom.
'I am very young, I know,' she said apologetically, 'and I've only just
finished my last course of Fairy History. So I know that if a fairy stops more
than half a second in a curse she can't go on, and some one else may[p105finish it for her. That is so,
Your Majesty, isn't it?' she said, appealing to Benevola. And the Queen of the
Fairies said Yes, that was the law, only it was such an old one most people had
forgotten it.
'You think yourself very clever,' said Malevola, 'but as a matter of fact
you're simply silly. That's the very thing I've provided against. She
can't have any one to stand by her in battle, so she'll lose her
kingdom and every one will be killed, and I shall come to the funeral. It will
be enormous,' she added rubbing her hands at the joyous thought.
'If you've quite finished,' said the King politely, 'and if you're sure you
won't take any refreshment, may I wish you a very good afternoon?' He held the
door open himself, and Malevola went out chuckling. The whole of the party then
burst into tears.
'Never mind,' said the King at last, wiping his eyes with the tails of his
ermine. 'It's a long way off and perhaps it won't happen after all.'
* * * * *
But of course it did.
The King did what he could to prepare his daughter for the fight in which she
was to stand alone against her enemies. He had her taught fencing and riding and
shooting, both with the cross bow and the long bow, as well[p106as
with pistols, rifles, and artillery. She learned to dive and to swim, to run and
to jump, to box and to wrestle, so that she grew up as strong and healthy as any
young man, and could, indeed, have got the best of a fight with any prince of
her own age. But the few princes who called at the palace did not come to fight
the Princess, and when they heard that the Princess had no dowry except the
gifts of the fairies, and also what Malevola's gift had been, they all said they
had just looked in as they were passing and that they must be going now, thank
you. And went.
And then the dreadful thing happened. The tradesmen, who had for years been
calling for the last time before, etc., really decided to place the matter in
other hands. They called in a neighbouring king who marched his army into
Ozymandias's country, conquered the army-the soldiers' wages hadn't been paid
for years-turned out the King and Queen, paid the tradesmen's bills, had most of
the palace walls papered with the receipts, and set up housekeeping there
himself.
Now when this happened the Princess was away on a visit to her aunt, the
Empress of Oricalchia, half the world away, and there is no regular post between
the two countries, so that when she came home, travelling with a[p107train of fifty-four camels,
which is rather slow work, and arrived at her own kingdom, she expected to find
all the flags flying and the bells ringing and the streets decked in roses to
welcome her home.
Instead of which nothing of the kind. The streets were all as dull as dull,
the shops were closed because it was early-closing day, and she did not see a
single person she knew.
She left the fifty-four camels laden with the presents her aunt had given her
outside the gates, and rode alone on her own pet camel to the palace, wondering
whether perhaps her father had not received the letter she had sent on ahead by
carrier pigeon the day before.
And when she got to the palace and got off her camel and went in, there was a
strange king on her father's throne and a strange queen sat in her mother's
place at his side.
'Where's my father?' said the Princess, bold as brass, standing on the steps
of the throne. 'And what are you doing there?'
'I might ask you that,' said the King.'Who are you, anyway?'
'I am the Princess Ozyliza,' said she.
'Oh, I've heard of you,' said the King.'You've been expected for some time.
Your father's been evicted, so now you know. No, I can't give you his
address.'
[p108] Just then some one came and whispered to the Queen that
fifty-four camels laden with silks and velvets and monkeys and parakeets and the
richest treasures of Oricalchia were outside the city gate. She put two and two
together, and whispered to the King, who nodded and said:
'I wish to make a new law.'
Every one fell flat on his face. The law is so much respected in that
country.
'No one called Ozyliza is allowed to own property in this kingdom,' said the
King.'Turn out that stranger.'
So the Princess was turned out of her father's palace, and went out and cried
in the palace gardens where she had been so happy when she was little.
And the baker's boy, who was now the baker's young man, came by with the
standard bread and saw some one crying among the oleanders, and went to say,
'Cheer up!' to whoever it was. And it was the Princess. He knew her at once.
'Oh, Princess,' he said, 'cheer up! Nothing is ever so bad as it seems.'
'Oh, Baker's Boy,' said she, for she knew him too, 'how can I cheer up? I am
turned out of my kingdom. I haven't got my father's address, and I have to face
my enemies[p109without a single human being to
stand by me.'
[opp
p109]
 Instantly a flight of winged arrows crossed the
garden.
'That's not true, at any rate,' said the baker's boy, whose name was
Erinaceus,'you've got me. If you'll let me be your squire, I'll follow you round
the world and help you to fight your enemies.'
'You won't be let,' said the Princess sadly,'but I thank you very much all
the same.'
She dried her eyes and stood up.
'I must go,' she said, 'and I've nowhere to go to.'
Now as soon as the Princess had been turned out of the palace, the Queen
said,'You'd much better have beheaded her for treason.' And the King said, 'I'll
tell the archers to pick her off as she leaves the grounds.'
So when she stood up, out there among the oleanders, some one on the terrace
cried,'There she is!' and instantly a flight of winged arrows crossed the
garden. At the cry Erinaceus flung himself in front of her, clasping her in his
arms and turning his back to the arrows. The Royal Archers were a thousand
strong and all excellent shots. Erinaceus felt a thousand arrows sticking into
his back.
'And now my last friend is dead,' cried the Princess. But being a very strong
princess,[p110she dragged him into the
shrubbery out of sight of the palace, and then dragged him into the wood and
called aloud on Benevola, Queen of the Fairies, and Benevola came.
'They've killed my only friend,' said the Princess, 'at least…. Shall I pull
out the arrows?'
'If you do,' said the Fairy, 'he'll certainly bleed to death.'
'And he'll die if they stay in,' said the Princess.
'Not necessarily,' said the Fairy; 'let me cut them a little shorter.' She
did, with her fairy pocket-knife. 'Now,' she said, 'I'll do what I can, but I'm
afraid it'll be a disappointment to you both. Erinaceus,' she went on,
addressing the unconscious baker's boy with the stumps of the arrows still
sticking in him,'I command you, as soon as I have vanished, to assume the form
of a hedge-pig. The hedge-pig,'she exclaimed to the Princess, 'is the only nice
person who can live comfortably with a thousand spikes sticking out of him. Yes,
I know there are porcupines, but porcupines are vicious and ill-mannered.
Good-bye!'
And with that she vanished. So did Erinaceus, and the Princess found herself
alone among the oleanders; and on the green turf was a small and very prickly
brown hedge-pig.
[p111] 'Oh, dear!' she said, 'now I'm all alone again, and the
baker's boy has given his life for mine, and mine isn't worth having.'
'It's worth more than all the world,' said a sharp little voice at her
feet.
'Oh, can you talk?' she said, quite cheered.
'Why not?' said the hedge-pig sturdily;'it's only the form of the
hedge-pig I've assumed. I'm Erinaceus inside, all right enough. Pick me up in a
corner of your mantle so as not to prick your darling hands.'
'You mustn't call names, you know,' said the Princess, 'even your
hedge-pigginess can't excuse such liberties.'
'I'm sorry, Princess,' said the hedge-pig,'but I can't help it. Only human
beings speak lies; all other creatures tell the truth. Now I've got a
hedge-pig's tongue it won't speak anything but the truth. And the truth is that
I love you more than all the world.'
'Well,' said the Princess thoughtfully, 'since you're a hedge-pig I suppose
you may love me, and I may love you. Like pet dogs or gold-fish. Dear little
hedge-pig, then!'
'Don't!' said the hedge-pig, 'remember I'm the baker's boy in my mind and
soul. My hedge-pigginess is only skin-deep. Pick me up, dearest of Princesses,
and let us go to seek our fortunes.'
[p112] 'I think it's my parents I ought to seek,'said the
Princess. 'However…'
She picked up the hedge-pig in the corner of her mantle and they went away
through the wood.
They slept that night at a wood-cutter's cottage. The wood-cutter was very
kind, and made a nice little box of beech-wood for the hedge-pig to be carried
in, and he told the Princess that most of her father's subjects were still
loyal, but that no one could fight for him because they would be fighting for
the Princess too, and however much they might wish to do this, Malevola's curse
assured them that it was impossible.
So the Princess put her hedge-pig in its little box and went on, looking
everywhere for her father and mother, and, after more adventures than I have
time to tell you, she found them at last, living in quite a poor way in a
semi-detached villa at Tooting. They were very glad to see her, but when they
heard that she meant to try to get back the kingdom, the King said:
'I shouldn't bother, my child, I really shouldn't. We are quite happy here. I
have the pension always given to Deposed Monarchs, and your mother is becoming a
really economical manager.'
[p113] The Queen blushed with pleasure, and said,'Thank you,
dear. But if you should succeed in turning that wicked usurper out, Ozyliza, I
hope I shall be a better queen than I used to be. I am learning housekeeping at
an evening class at the Crown-maker's Institute.'
The Princess kissed her parents and went out into the garden to think it
over. But the garden was small and quite full of wet washing hung on lines. So
she went into the road, but that was full of dust and perambulators. Even the
wet washing was better than that, so she went back and sat down on the grass in
a white alley of tablecloths and sheets, all marked with a crown in indelible
ink. And she took the hedge-pig out of the box. It was rolled up in a ball, but
she stroked the little bit of soft forehead that you can always find if you look
carefully at a rolled-up hedge-pig, and the hedge-pig uncurled and said:
'I am afraid I was asleep, Princess dear. Did you want me?'
'You're the only person who knows all about everything,' said she. 'I haven't
told father and mother about the arrows. Now what do you advise?'
Erinaceus was flattered at having his advice asked, but unfortunately he
hadn't any to give.
'It's your work, Princess,' he said. 'I can[p114only promise to do anything a
hedge-pig cando. It's not much. Of course I could die for you, but
that's so useless.'
'Quite,' said she.
'I wish I were invisible,' he said dreamily.
'Oh, where are you?' cried Ozyliza, for the hedge-pig had vanished.
'Here,' said a sharp little voice. 'You can't see me, but I can see
everything I want to see. And I can see what to do. I'll crawl into my box, and
you must disguise yourself as an old French governess with the best references
and answer the advertisement that the wicked king put yesterday in the “Usurpers
Journal.”'
The Queen helped the Princess to disguise herself, which, of course, the
Queen would never have done if she had known about the arrows; and the King gave
her some of his pension to buy a ticket with, so she went back quite quickly, by
train, to her own kingdom.
The usurping King at once engaged the French governess to teach his cook to
read French cookery books, because the best recipes are in French. Of course he
had no idea that there was a princess, the Princess, beneath the
governessial disguise. The French lessons were from 6 to 8 in the morning and
from 2 to 4 in the afternoon, and all the rest of the time the governess could
spend as she liked. She[p115spent
it walking about the palace gardens and talking to her invisible hedge-pig. They
talked about everything under the sun, and the hedge-pig was the best of
company.
'How did you become invisible?' she asked one day, and it said, 'I suppose it
was Benevola's doing. Only I think every one gets onewish granted if
they only wish hard enough.'
On the fifty-fifth day the hedge-pig said,'Now, Princess dear, I'm going to
begin to get you back your kingdom.'
And next morning the King came down to breakfast in a dreadful rage with his
face covered up in bandages.
'This palace is haunted,' he said. 'In the middle of the night a dreadful
spiked ball was thrown in my face. I lighted a match. There was nothing.'
The Queen said, 'Nonsense! You must have been dreaming.'
But next morning it was her turn to come down with a bandaged face. And the
night after, the King had the spiky ball thrown at him again. And then the Queen
had it. And then they both had it, so that they couldn't sleep at all, and had
to lie awake with nothing to think of but their wickedness. And every five
minutes a very little voice whispered:
'Who stole the kingdom? Who killed the[p116Princess?' till the King and
Queen could have screamed with misery.
And at last the Queen said, 'We needn't have killed the Princess.'
And the King said, 'I've been thinking that, too.'
And next day the King said, 'I don't know that we ought to have taken this
kingdom. We had a really high-class kingdom of our own.'
'I've been thinking that too,' said the Queen.
By this time their hands and arms and necks and faces and ears were very sore
indeed, and they were sick with want of sleep.
'Look here,' said the King, 'let's chuck it. Let's write to Ozymandias and
tell him he can take over his kingdom again. I've had jolly well enough of
this.'
'Let's,' said the Queen, 'but we can't bring the Princess to life again. I do
wish we could,'and she cried a little through her bandages into her egg, for it
was breakfast time.
'Do you mean that,' said a little sharp voice, though there was no one to be
seen in the room. The King and Queen clung to each other in terror, upsetting
the urn over the toast-rack.
'Do you mean it?' said the voice again;'answer, yes or no.'
'Yes,' said the Queen, 'I don't know who[p117you are, but, yes, yes, yes. I
can't think how we could have been so wicked.'
'Nor I,' said the King.
'Then send for the French governess,' said the voice.
'Ring the bell, dear,' said the Queen. 'I'm sure what it says is right. It is
the voice of conscience. I've often heard of it, but I never heard it
before.'
The King pulled the richly-jewelled bell-rope and ten magnificent green and
gold footmen appeared.
'Please ask Mademoiselle to step this way,'said the Queen.
The ten magnificent green and gold footmen found the governess beside the
marble basin feeding the gold-fish, and, bowing their ten green backs, they gave
the Queen's message. The governess who, every one agreed, was always most
obliging, went at once to the pink satin breakfast-room where the King and Queen
were sitting, almost unrecognisable in their bandages.
'Yes, Your Majesties?' said she curtseying.
'The voice of conscience,' said the Queen,'told us to send for you. Is there
any recipe in the French books for bringing shot princesses to life? If so, will
you kindly translate it for us?'
[p118] 'There is one,' said the Princess thoughtfully,
'and it is quite simple. Take a king and a queen and the voice of conscience.
Place them in a clean pink breakfast-room with eggs, coffee, and toast. Add a
full-sized French governess. The king and queen must be thoroughly pricked and
bandaged, and the voice of conscience must be very distinct.'
'Is that all?' asked the Queen.
'That's all,' said the governess, 'except that the king and queen must have
two more bandages over their eyes, and keep them on till the voice of conscience
has counted fifty-five very slowly.'
'If you would be so kind,' said the Queen,
'as to bandage us with our table napkins? Only be careful how you fold them,
because our faces are very sore, and the royal monogram is very stiff and hard
owing to its being embroidered in seed pearls by special command.'
'I will be very careful,' said the governess kindly.
The moment the King and Queen were blindfolded, the 'voice of conscience'
began, 'one, two, three,' and Ozyliza tore off her disguise, and under the fussy
black-and-violet-spotted alpaca of the French governess was the simple slim
cloth-of-silver dress of the Princess. She stuffed the alpaca up the chimney and
the grey[p119wig into the tea-cosy, and had
disposed of the mittens in the coffee-pot and the elastic-side boots in the
coal-scuttle, just as the voice of conscience said-
'Fifty-three, fifty-four, fifty-five!' and stopped.
The King and Queen pulled off the bandages, and there, alive and well, with
bright clear eyes and pinky cheeks and a mouth that smiled, was the Princess
whom they supposed to have been killed by the thousand arrows of their thousand
archers.
Before they had time to say a word the Princess said:
'Good morning, Your Majesties. I am afraid you have had bad dreams. So have
I. Let us all try to forget them. I hope you will stay a little longer in my
palace. You are very welcome. I am so sorry you have been hurt.'
'We deserved it,' said the Queen, 'and we want to say we have heard the voice
of conscience, and do please forgive us.'
'Not another word,' said the Princess, 'dolet me have some fresh tea
made. And some more eggs. These are quite cold. And the urn's been upset. We'll
have a new breakfast. And I am so sorry your faces are so sore.'
'If you kissed them,' said the voice which[p120the King and Queen called the
voice of conscience, 'their faces would not be sore any more.'
'May I?' said Ozyliza, and kissed the King's ear and the Queen's nose, all
she could get at through the bandages.
And instantly they were quite well.
They had a delightful breakfast. Then the King caused the royal household to
assemble in the throne-room, and there announced that, as the Princess had come
to claim the kingdom, they were returning to their own kingdom by the
three-seventeen train on Thursday.
Every one cheered like mad, and the whole town was decorated and illuminated
that evening. Flags flew from every house, and the bells all rang, just as the
Princess had expected them to do that day when she came home with the fifty-five
camels. All the treasure these had carried was given back to the Princess, and
the camels themselves were restored to her, hardly at all the worse for
wear.
The usurping King and Queen were seen off at the station by the Princess, and
parted from her with real affection. You see they weren't completely wicked in
their hearts, but they had never had time to think before. And being kept awake
at night forced them to think.[p121And the 'voice of conscience'
gave them something to think about.
They gave the Princess the receipted bills, with which most of the palace was
papered, in return for board and lodging.
When they were gone a telegram was sent off.
Ozymandias Rex, Esq., Chatsworth, Delamere Road, Tooting, England.
Please come home at once. Palace vacant. Tenants have left.-Ozyliza P.
And they came immediately.
When they arrived the Princess told them the whole story, and they kissed and
praised her, and called her their deliverer and the saviour of her country.
'I haven't done anything,' she said. 'It was Erinaceus who did
everything, and….'
'But the fairies said,' interrupted the King, who was never clever at the
best of times,'that you couldn't get the kingdom back till you had a thousand
spears devoted to you, to you alone.'
'There are a thousand spears in my back,'said a little sharp voice, 'and they
are all devoted to the Princess and to her alone.'
[p122] 'Don't!' said the King irritably. 'That voice coming out
of nothing makes me jump.'
'I can't get used to it either,' said the Queen.'We must have a gold cage
built for the little animal. But I must say I wish it was visible.'
'So do I,' said the Princess earnestly. And instantly it was. I suppose the
Princess wished it very hard, for there was the hedge-pig with its long spiky
body and its little pointed face, its bright eyes, its small round ears, and its
sharp, turned-up nose.
It looked at the Princess but it did not speak.
'Say something now,' said Queen Eliza. 'I should like to
see a hedge-pig speak.'
'The truth is, if speak I must, I must speak the truth,' said Erinaceus. 'The
Princess has thrown away her life-wish to make me visible. I wish she had wished
instead for something nice for herself.'
'Oh, was that my life-wish?' cried the Princess. 'I didn't know, dear
Hedge-pig, I didn't know. If I'd only known, I would have wished you back into
your proper shape.'
'If you had,' said the hedge-pig, 'it would have been the shape of a dead
man. Remember that I have a thousand spears in my back, and no man can carry
those and live.'
The Princess burst into tears.
[opp
p123]
 'I would kiss you on every one of your thousand
spears,' she said, 'to give you what you wish.'
[p123] 'Oh, you can't go on being a hedge-pig for ever,' she
said, 'it's not fair. I can't bear it. Oh Mamma! Oh Papa! Oh Benevola!'
And there stood Benevola before them, a little dazzling figure with blue
butterfly's wings and a wreath of moonshine.
'Well?' she said, 'well?'
'Oh, you know,' said the Princess, still crying. 'I've thrown away my
life-wish, and he's still a hedge-pig. Can't you do anything!'
'I can't,' said the Fairy, 'but you can. Your kisses are magic
kisses. Don't you remember how you cured the King and Queen of all the wounds
the hedge-pig made by rolling itself on to their faces in the night?'
'But she can't go kissing hedge-pigs,' said the Queen, 'it would be most
unsuitable. Besides it would hurt her.'
But the hedge-pig raised its little pointed face, and the Princess took it up
in her hands. She had long since learned how to do this without hurting either
herself or it. She looked in its little bright eyes.
'I would kiss you on every one of your thousand spears,' she said, 'to give
you what you wish.'
'Kiss me once,' it said, 'where my fur is soft. That is all I wish, and
enough to live and die for.'
[p124] She stooped her head and kissed it on its forehead where
the fur is soft, just where the prickles begin.
And instantly she was standing with her hands on a young man's shoulders and
her lips on a young man's face just where the hair begins and the forehead
leaves off. And all round his feet lay a pile of fallen arrows.
She drew back and looked at him.
'Erinaceus,' she said, 'you're different-from the baker's boy I mean.'
'When I was an invisible hedge-pig,' he said, 'I knew everything. Now I have
forgotten all that wisdom save only two things. One is that I am a king's son.
I was stolen away in infancy by an unprincipled baker, and I am really the son
of that usurping King whose face I rolled on in the night. It is a painful thing
to roll on your father's face when you are all spiky, but I did it, Princess,
for your sake, and for my father's too. And now I will go to him and tell him
all, and ask his forgiveness.'
'You won't go away?' said the Princess.'Ah! don't go away. What shall I do
without my hedge-pig?'
Erinaceus stood still, looking very handsome and like a prince.
'What is the other thing that you remember[p125of your hedge-pig wisdom?'
asked the Queen curiously. And Erinaceus answered, not to her but to the
Princess:
'The other thing, Princess, is that I love you.'
'Isn't there a third thing, Erinaceus?' said the Princess, looking down.
'There is, but you must speak that, not I.'
'Oh,' said the Princess, a little disappointed,'then you knew that I loved
you?'
'Hedge-pigs are very wise little beasts,' said Erinaceus, 'but I only knew
that when you told it me.'
'I-told you?'
'When you kissed my little pointed face, Princess,' said Erinaceus, 'I knew
then.'
'My goodness gracious me,' said the King.
'Quite so,' said Benevola, 'and I wouldn't ask any one to the
wedding.'
'Except you, dear,' said the Queen.
'Well, as I happened to be passing …there's no time like the
present,' said Benevola briskly. 'Suppose you give orders for the wedding bells
to be rung now, at once!'
[p126] V SEPTIMUS SEPTIMUSSON
The wind was screaming over the marsh. It shook
the shutters and rattled the windows, and the little boy lay awake in the bare
attic. His mother came softly up the ladder stairs shading the flame of the
tallow candle with her hand.
'I'm not asleep, mother,' said he. And she heard the tears in his voice.
'Why, silly lad,' she said, sitting down on the straw-bed beside him and
putting the candle on the floor, 'what are you crying for?'
'It's the wind keeps calling me, mother,' he said. 'It won't let me alone. It
never has since I put up the little weather-cock for it to play with. It keeps
saying, “Wake up, Septimus Septimusson, wake up, you're the seventh son of a
seventh son. You can see the fairies and hear the beasts speak, and you must go
out and seek your fortune.” And I'm afraid, and I don't want to go.'
[p127] 'I should think not indeed,' said his mother.'The wind
doesn't talk, Sep, not really. You just go to sleep like a good boy, and I'll
get father to bring you a gingerbread pig from the fair to-morrow.'
But Sep lay awake a long time listening to what the wind really did keep on
saying, and feeling ashamed to think how frightened he was of going out all
alone to seek his fortune-a thing all the boys in books were only too happy to
do.
Next evening father brought home the loveliest gingerbread pig with currant
eyes. Sep ate it, and it made him less anxious than ever to go out into the
world where, perhaps, no one would give him gingerbread pigs ever any more.
Before he went to bed he ran down to the shore where a great new harbour was
being made. The workmen had been blasting the big rocks, and on one of the rocks
a lot of mussels were sticking. He stood looking at them, and then suddenly he
heard a lot of little voices crying, 'Oh Sep, we're so frightened, we're
choking.'
The voices were thin and sharp as the edges of mussel shells. They were
indeed the voices of the mussels themselves.
'Oh dear,' said Sep, 'I'm so sorry, but I[p128can't move the rock back into
the sea, you know. Can I now?'
'No,' said the mussels, 'but if you speak to the wind,-you know his language
and he's very fond of you since you made that toy for him,-he'll blow the sea up
till the waves wash us back into deep water.'
'But I'm afraid of the wind,' said Sep, 'it says things that frighten
me.'
'Oh very well,' said the mussels, 'we don't want you to be afraid. We can die
all right if necessary.'
Then Sep shivered and trembled.
'Go away,' said the thin sharp voices.'We'll die-but we'd rather die in our
own brave company.'
'I know I'm a coward,' said Sep. 'Oh, wait a minute.'
'Death won't wait,' said the little voices.
'I can't speak to the wind, I won't,' said Sep, and almost at the same moment
he heard himself call out, 'Oh wind, please come and blow up the waves to save
the poor mussels.'
The wind answered with a boisterous shout-
'All right, my boy,' it shrieked, 'I'm coming.' And come it did. And when it
had attended to the mussels it came and whispered to Sep in his attic. And to
his great surprise,[p129instead of covering his head with the bed-clothes, as usual,
and trying not to listen, he found himself sitting up in bed and talking to the
wind, man to man.
'Why,' he said, 'I'm not afraid of you any more.'
'Of course not, we're friends now,' said the wind. 'That's because we joined
together to do a kindness to some one. There's nothing like that for making
people friends.'
'Oh,' said Sep.
'Yes,' said the wind, 'and now, old chap, when will you go out and seek your
fortune? Remember how poor your father is, and the fortune, if you find it,
won't be just for you, but for your father and mother and the others.'
'Oh,' said Sep, 'I didn't think of that.'
'Yes,' said the wind, 'really, my dear fellow, I do hate to bother you, but
it's better to fix a time. Now when shall we start?'
'We?' said Sep. 'Are you going with me?'
'I'll see you a bit of the way,' said the wind.'What do you say now? Shall we
start to-night? There's no time like the present.'
'I do hate going,' said Sep.
'Of course you do!' said the wind, cordially.'Come along. Get into your
things, and we'll make a beginning.'
So Sep dressed, and he wrote on his slate in[p130very big letters, 'Gone to seek
our fortune,'and he put it on the table so that his mother should see it when
she came down in the morning. And he went out of the cottage and the wind kindly
shut the door after him.
The wind gently pushed him down to the shore, and there he got into his
father's boat, which was called the Septimus and Susie, after his father
and mother, and the wind carried him across to another country and there he
landed.
'Now,' said the wind, clapping him on the back, 'off you go, and good luck to
you!'
And it turned round and took the boat home again.
When Sep's mother found the writing on the slate, and his father found the
boat gone they feared that Sep was drowned, but when the wind brought the boat
back wrong way up, they were quite sure, and they both cried for many a long
day.
The wind tried to tell them that Sep was all right, but they couldn't
understand wind-talk, and they only said, 'Drat the wind,' and fastened the
shutters up tight, and put wedges in the windows.
Sep walked along the straight white road that led across the new country. He
had no more idea how to look for his fortune than you would have if you
suddenly left off reading[p131this
and went out of your front door to seekyours.
However, he had made a start, and that is always something. When he had gone
exactly seven miles on that straight foreign road, between strange trees, and
bordered with flowers he did not know the names of, he heard a groaning in the
wood, and some one sighing and saying, 'Oh, how hard it is, to have to die and
never see my wife and the little cubs again.'
The voice was rough as a lion's mane, and strong as a lion's claws, and Sep
was very frightened. But he said, 'I'm not afraid,' and then oddly enough he
found he had spoken the truth-he wasn't afraid.
He broke through the bushes and found that the person who had spoken was
indeed a lion. A javelin had pierced its shoulder and fastened it to a great
tree.
'All right,' cried Sep, 'hold still a minute, sir.'
He got out his knife and cut and cut at the shaft of the javelin till he was
able to break it off. Then the lion drew back and the broken shaft passed
through the wound and the broken javelin was left sticking in the tree.
'I'm really extremely obliged, my dear fellow,' said the lion warmly. 'Pray
command[p132me, if there's any little thing I can do for you at any
time.'
'Don't mention it,' said Sep with proper politeness, 'delighted to have been
of use to you, I'm sure.'
So they parted. As Sep scrambled through the bushes back to the road he
kicked against an axe that lay on the ground.
'Hullo,' said he, 'some poor woodman's dropped this, and not been able to
find it. I'll take it along-perhaps I may meet him.'
He was getting very tired and very hungry, and presently he sat down to rest
under a chestnut-tree, and he heard two little voices talking in the branches,
voices soft as a squirrel's fur, and bright as a squirrel's eyes. They were,
indeed, the voices of two squirrels.
'Hush,' said one, 'there's some one below.'
'Oh,' said the other, 'it's a horrid boy. Let's scurry away.'
'I'm not a horrid boy,' said Sep. 'I'm the seventh son of a seventh son.'
'Oh,' said Mrs. Squirrel, 'of course that makes all the difference. Have some
nuts?'
'Rather,' said Sep. 'At least I mean, yes, if you please.'
So the squirrels brought nuts down to him, and when he had eaten as many as
he wanted they filled his pockets, and then in return he[p133chopped all the lower boughs off the chestnut-tree, so that
boys who were not seventh sons could not climb up and interfere with
the squirrels' housekeeping arrangements.
Then they parted, the best of friends, and Sep went on.
'I haven't found my fortune yet,' said he,'but I've made a friend or
two.'
And just as he was saying that, he turned a corner of the road and met an old
gentleman in a fur-lined coat riding a fine, big, grey horse.
'Hullo!' said the gentleman. 'Who are you, and where are you off to so bright
and early?'
'I'm Septimus Septimusson,' said Sep, 'and I'm going to seek my fortune.'
'And you've taken an axe to help you carve your way to glory?'
'No,' said Sep, 'I found it, and I suppose some one lost it. So I'm bringing
it along in case I meet him.'
'Heavy, isn't it?' said the old gentleman.
'Yes,' said Sep.
'Then I'll carry it for you,' said the old gentleman, 'for it's one that my
head forester lost yesterday. And now come along with me, for you're the boy
I've been looking for for seven years-an honest boy and the seventh son of a
seventh son.'
So Sep went home with the gentleman, who[p134was a great lord in that
country, and he lived in that lord's castle and was taught everything that a
gentleman ought to know. And in return he told the lord all about the ways of
birds and beasts-for as he understood their talk he knew more about them than
any one else in that country. And the lord wrote it all down in a book, and half
the people said it was wonderfully clever, and the other half said it was
nonsense, and how could he know. This was fame, and the lord was very pleased.
But though the old lord was so famous he would not leave his castle, for he had
a hump that an enchanter had fastened on to him, and he couldn't bear to be seen
with it.
'But you'll get rid of it for me some day, my boy,' he used to say. 'No one
but the seventh son of a seventh son and an honest boy can do it. So all the
doctors say.'
So Sep grew up. And when he was twenty-one-straight as a lance and handsome
as a picture-the old lord said to him.
'My boy, you've been like a son to me, but now it's time you got married and
had sons of your own. Is there any girl you'd like to marry?'
'No,' said Sep, 'I never did care much for girls.'
The old lord laughed.
[p135] 'Then you must set out again and seek your fortune once
more,' he said, 'because no man has really found his fortune till he's found the
lady who is his heart's lady. Choose the best horse in the stable, and off you
go, lad, and my blessing go with you.'
So Sep chose
a good red horse and set out, and he rode straight to the great city, that shone
golden across the plain, and when he got there he found every one crying.
'Why, whatever is the matter?' said Sep, reining in the red horse in front of
a smithy, where the apprentices were crying on to the fires, and the smith was
dropping tears on the anvil.
'Why the Princess is dying,' said the blacksmith blowing his nose. 'A nasty,
wicked magician-he had a spite against the King, and he got at the Princess when
she was playing ball in the garden, and now she's blind and deaf and dumb. And
she won't eat.'
'And she'll die,' said the first apprentice.
'And she is such a dear,' said the other apprentice.
Sep sat still on the red horse thinking.
'Has anything been done?' he asked.
'Oh yes,' said the blacksmith. 'All the doctors have seen her, but they can't
do anything. And the King has advertised in the usual way, that any one who can
cure her may[p136marry her. But it's no good.
King's sons aren't what they used to be. A silly lot they are nowadays, all
taken up with football and cricket and golf.'
'Humph,' said Sep, 'thank you. Which is the way to the palace?'
The blacksmith pointed, and then burst into tears again. Sep rode on.
When he got to the palace he asked to see the King. Every one there was
crying too, from the footman who opened the door to the King, who was sitting
upon his golden throne and looking at his fine collection of butterflies through
floods of tears.
'Oh dear me yes, young man,' said the King,'you may see her and
welcome, but it's no good.'
'We can but try,' said Sep. So he was taken to the room where the Princess
sat huddled up on her silver throne among the white velvet cushions with her
crown all on one side, crying out of her poor blind eyes, so that the tears ran
down over her green gown with the red roses on it.
And directly he saw her he knew that she was the only girl, Princess as she
was, with a crown and a throne, who could ever be his heart's lady. He went up
to her and kneeled at her side and took her hand and kissed it. The Princess
started. She could not see or[p137hear
him, but at the touch of his hand and his lips she knew that he was her heart's
lord, and she threw her arms round his neck, and cried more than ever.
He held her in his arms and stroked her hair till she stopped crying, and
then he called for bread and milk. This was brought in a silver basin, and he
fed her with it as you feed a little child.
The news ran through the city, 'The Princess has eaten,' and all the bells
were set ringing. Sep said good-night to his Princess and went to bed in the
best bedroom of the palace. Early in the grey morning he got up and leaned out
of the open window and called to his old friend the wind.
And the wind came bustling in and clapped him on the back, crying, 'Well, my
boy, and what can I do for you? Eh?'
Sep told him all about the Princess.
'Well,' said the wind, 'you've not done so badly. At any rate you've got her
love. And you couldn't have got that with anybody's help but your own. Now, of
course, the thing to do is to find the wicked Magician.'
'Of course,' said Sep.
'Well-I travel a good deal-I'll keep my eyes open, and let you know if I hear
anything.'
Sep spent the day holding the Princess's[p138hand, and feeding her at meal
times; and that night the wind rattled his window and said,'Let me in.'
It came in very noisily, and said, 'Well, I've found your Magician, he's in
the forest pretending to be a mole.'
'How can I find him?' said Sep.
'Haven't you any friends in the forest?'asked the wind.
Then Sep remembered his friends the squirrels, and he mounted his horse and
rode away to the chestnut-tree where they lived. They were charmed to see him
grown so tall and strong and handsome, and when he had told them his story they
said at once-
'Oh yes! delighted to be of any service to you.' And they called to all their
little brothers and cousins, and uncles and nephews to search the forest for a
mole that wasn't really a mole, and quite soon they found him, and hustled and
shoved him along till he was face to face with Sep, in a green glade. The glade
was green, but all the bushes and trees around were red-brown with squirrel fur,
and shining bright with squirrel eyes.
Then Sep said, 'Give the Princess back her eyes and her hearing and her
voice.'
But the mole would not.
'Give the Princess back her eyes and her[p139hearing and her voice,' said
Sep again. But the mole only gnashed his wicked teeth and snarled.
And then in a minute the squirrels fell on the mole and killed it, and Sep
thanked them and rode back to the palace, for, of course, he knew that when a
magician is killed, all his magic unworks itself instantly.
But when he got to his Princess she was still as deaf as a post and as dumb
as a stone, and she was still crying bitterly with her poor blind eyes, till the
tears ran down her grass-green gown with the red roses on it.
'Cheer up, my sweetheart,' he said, though he knew she couldn't hear him, and
as he spoke the wind came in at the open window, and spoke very softly, because
it was in the presence of the Princess.
'All right,' it whispered, 'the old villain gave us the slip that journey.
Got out of the mole-skin in the very nick of time. He's a wild boar now.'
'Come,' said Sep, fingering his sword-hilt,'I'll kill that myself without
asking it any questions.'
So he went and fought it. But it was a most uncommon boar, as big as a horse,
with tusks half a yard long; and although Sep wounded it it jerked the sword out
of his hand[p140with its tusk, and was just
going to trample him out of life with its hard, heavy pigs'-feet, when a great
roar sounded through the forest.
'Ah! would ye?' said the lion, and fastened teeth and claws in the great
boar's back. The boar turned with a scream of rage, but the lion had got a good
grip, and it did not loosen teeth or claws till the boar lay quiet.
'Is he dead?' asked Sep when he came to himself.
'Oh yes, he's dead right enough,' said the lion; but the wind came
up puffing and blowing, and said:
'It's no good, he's got away again, and now he's a fish. I was just a minute
too late to seewhat fish. An old oyster told me about it, only he
hadn't the wit to notice what particular fish the scoundrel changed into.'
So then Sep went back to the palace, and he said to the King:
'Let me marry the dear Princess, and we'll go out and seek our fortune. I've
got to kill that Magician, and I'll do it too, or my name's not Septimus
Septimusson. But it may take years and years, and I can't be away from the
Princess all that time, because she won't eat unless I feed her. You see the
difficulty, Sire?'
The King saw it. And that very day Sep[p141was married to the Princess in
her green gown with the red roses on it, and they set out together.
The wind went with them, and the wind, or something else, seemed to say to
Sep, 'Go home, take your wife home to your mother.'
So he did. He crossed the land and he crossed the sea, and he went up the
red-brick path to his father's cottage, and he peeped in at the door and
said:
'Father, mother, here's my wife.'
They were so pleased to see him-for they had thought him dead, that they
didn't notice the Princess at first, and when they did notice her they wondered
at her beautiful face and her beautiful gown-but it wasn't till they had all
settled down to supper-boiled rabbit it was-and they noticed Sep feeding his
wife as one feeds a baby that they saw that she was blind.
And then all the story had to be told.
'Well, well,' said the fisherman, 'you and your wife bide here with us. I
daresay I'll catch that old sinner in my nets one of these fine days.' But he
never did. And Sep and his wife lived with the old people. And they were happy
after a fashion-but of an evening Sep used to wander and wonder, and wonder and
wander by the sea-shore, wondering as he[p142wandered whether he wouldn't ever have the luck to catch that
fish.
And one evening as he wandered wondering he heard a little, sharp, thin voice
say:
'Sep. I've got it.'
'What?' asked Sep, forgetting his manners.
'I've got it,' said a big mussel on a rock close by him, 'the magic stone
that the Magician does his enchantments with. He dropped it out of his mouth and
I shut my shells on it-and now he's sweeping up and down the sea like a mad
fish, looking for it-for he knows he can never change into anything else unless
he gets it back. Here, take the nasty thing, it's making me feel quite ill.'
It opened its shells wide, and Sep saw a pearl. He reached out his hand and
took it.
'That's better,' said the mussel, washing its shells out with salt water.
'Can I do magic with it?' Sep eagerly asked.
'No,' said the mussel sadly, 'it's of no use to any one but the owner. Now,
if I were you, I'd get into a boat, and if your friend the wind will help us, I
believe we really can do the trick.'
'I'm at your service, of course,' said the wind, getting up instantly.
The mussel whispered to the wind, who rushed off at once; and Sep launched
his boat.
[p143] 'Now,' said the mussel, 'you get into the very middle of
the sea-or as near as you can guess it. The wind will warn all the other
fishes.' As he spoke he disappeared in the dark waters.
Sep got the boat into the middle of the sea-as near as he could guess it-and
waited.
After a long time he saw something swirling about in a sort of whirlpool
about a hundred yards from his boat, but when he tried to move the boat towards
it her bows ran on to something hard.
'Keep still, keep still, keep still,' cried thousands and thousands of sharp,
thin, little voices. 'You'll kill us if you move.'
Then he looked over the boat side, and saw that the hard something was
nothing but thousands and thousands of mussels all jammed close together, and
through the clear water more and more were coming and piling themselves
together. Almost at once his boat was slowly lifted-the top of the mussel heap
showed through the water, and there he was, high and dry on a mussel reef.
And in all that part of the sea the water was disappearing, and as far as the
eye could reach stretched a great plain of purple and gray-the shells of
countless mussels.
Only at one spot there was still a splashing.
[p144] Then a mussel opened its shell and spoke.
'We've got him,' it said. 'We've piled our selves up till we've filled this
part of the sea. The wind warned all the good fishes-and we've got the old
traitor in a little pool over there. Get out and walk over our backs-we'll all
lie sideways so as not to hurt you. You must catch the fish-but whatever you do
don't kill it till we give the word.'
Sep promised, and he got out and walked over the mussels to the pool, and
when he saw the wicked soul of the Magician looking out through the round eyes
of a big finny fish he remembered all that his Princess had suffered, and he
longed to draw his sword and kill the wicked thing then and there.
But he remembered his promise. He threw a net about it, and dragged it back
to the boat.
The mussels dispersed and let the boat down again into the water-and he rowed
home, towing the evil fish in the net by a line.
He beached the boat, and looked along the shore. The shore looked a very odd
colour. And well it might, for every bit of the sand was covered with
purple-gray mussels. They had all come up out of the sea-leaving just one little
bit of real yellow sand for him to beach the boat on.
[p145] 'Now,' said millions of sharp thin little voices, 'Kill
him, kill him!'
Sep drew his sword and waded into the shallow surf and killed the evil fish
with one strong stroke.
Then such a shout went up all along the shore as that shore had never heard;
and all along the shore where the mussels had been, stood men in armour and men
in smock-frocks and men in leather aprons and huntsmen's coats and women and
children-a whole nation of people. Close by the boat stood a King and Queen with
crowns upon their heads.
'Thank you, Sep,' said the King, 'you've saved us all. I am the King Mussel,
doomed to be a mussel so long as that wretch lived. You have set us all free.
And look!'
Down the path from the shore came running his own Princess, who hung round
his neck crying his name and looking at him with the most beautiful eyes in the
world.
'Come,' said the Mussel King, 'we have no son. You shall be our son and reign
after us.'
'Thank you,' said Sep, 'but this is my father,'and he presented the
old fisherman to His Majesty.
'Then let him come with us,' said the King royally, 'he can help me reign, or
fish in the palace lake, whichever he prefers.'
[p146] 'Thankee,' said Sep's father, 'I'll come and fish.'
'Your mother too,' said the Mussel Queen, kissing Sep's mother.
'Ah,' said Sep's mother, 'you're a lady, every inch. I'll go to the world's
end with you.'
So they all went back by way of the foreign country where Sep had found his
Princess, and they called on the old lord. He had lost his hump, and they easily
persuaded him to come with them.
'You can help me reign if you like, or we have a nice book or two in the
palace library,'said the Mussel King.
'Thank you,' said the old lord, 'I'll come and be your librarian if I may.
Reigning isn't at all in my line.'
Then they went on to Sep's father-in-law, and when he saw how happy they all
were together he said:
'Bless my beard but I've half a mind to come with you.'
'Come along,' said the Mussel King, 'you shall help me reign if you like …
or….'
'No, thank you,' said the other King very quickly, 'I've had enough of
reigning. My kingdom can buy a President and be a republic if it likes. I'm
going to catch butterflies.'
[p147] And so he does, most happily, up to this very minute.
And Sep and his dear Princess are as happy as they deserve to
be. Some people say we are all as happy as we deserve to be-but I am not
sure.
[p148] VI THE WHITE CAT
The White Cat lived at the back of a shelf at the
darkest end of the inside attic which was nearly dark all over. It had lived
there for years, because one of its white china ears was chipped, so that it was
no longer a possible ornament for the spare bedroom.
Tavy found it at the climax of a wicked and glorious afternoon. He had been
left alone. The servants were the only other people in the house. He had
promised to be good. He had meant to be good. And he had not been. He had done
everything you can think of. He had walked into the duck pond, and not a stitch
of his clothes but had had to be changed. He had climbed on a hay rick and
fallen off it, and had not broken his neck, which, as cook told him, he richly
deserved to do. He had found a mouse in the trap and put it in the kitchen
tea-pot, so that when cook went to make tea it jumped out at her, and affected[p149her to screams followed by
tears. Tavy was sorry for this, of course, and said so like a man. He had only,
he explained, meant to give her a little start. In the confusion that followed
the mouse, he had eaten all the black-currant jam that was put out for kitchen
tea, and for this too, he apologised handsomely as soon as it was pointed out to
him. He had broken a pane of the greenhouse with a stone and…. But why pursue
the painful theme? The last thing he had done was to explore the attic, where he
was never allowed to go, and to knock down the White Cat from its shelf.
The sound of its fall brought the servants. The cat was not broken-only its
other ear was chipped. Tavy was put to bed. But he got out as soon as the
servants had gone downstairs, crept up to the attic, secured the Cat, and washed
it in the bath. So that when mother came back from London, Tavy, dancing
impatiently at the head of the stairs, in a very wet night-gown, flung himself
upon her and cried, 'I've been awfully naughty, and I'm frightfully sorry, and
please may I have the White Cat for my very own?'
He was much sorrier than he had expected to be when he saw that mother was
too tired even to want to know, as she generally did,[p150exactly how naughty he had been. She only kissed him, and
said:
'I am sorry you've been naughty, my darling. Go back to bed now.
Good-night.'
Tavy was ashamed to say anything more about the China Cat, so he went back to
bed. But he took the Cat with him, and talked to it and kissed it, and went to
sleep with its smooth shiny shoulder against his cheek.
In the days that followed, he was extravagantly good. Being good seemed as
easy as being bad usually was. This may have been because mother seemed so tired
and ill; and gentlemen in black coats and high hats came to see mother, and
after they had gone she used to cry. (These things going on in a house sometimes
make people good; sometimes they act just the other way.) Or it may have been
because he had the China Cat to talk to. Anyhow, whichever way it was, at the
end of the week mother said:
'Tavy, you've been a dear good boy, and a great comfort to me. You must have
tried very hard to be good.'
It was difficult to say, 'No, I haven't, at least not since the first day,'
but Tavy got it said, and was hugged for his pains.
'You wanted,' said mother, 'the China Cat. Well, you may have it.'
[p151] 'For my very own?'
'For your very own. But you must be very careful not to break it. And you
mustn't give it away. It goes with the house. Your Aunt Jane made me promise to
keep it in the family. It's very, very old. Don't take it out of doors for fear
of accidents.'
'I love the White Cat, mother,' said Tavy.'I love it better'n all my
toys.'
Then mother told Tavy several things, and that night when he went to bed Tavy
repeated them all faithfully to the China Cat, who was about six inches high and
looked very intelligent.
'So you see,' he ended, 'the wicked lawyer's taken nearly all mother's money,
and we've got to leave our own lovely big White House, and go and live in a
horrid little house with another house glued on to its side. And mother does
hate it so.'
'I don't wonder,' said the China Cat very distinctly.
'What!' said Tavy, half-way into his night-shirt.
'I said, I don't wonder, Octavius,' said the China Cat, and rose from her
sitting position, stretched her china legs and waved her white china tail.
'You can speak?' said Tavy.
[p152] 'Can't you see I can?-hear I mean?' said the Cat. 'I
belong to you now, so I can speak to you. I couldn't before. It wouldn't have
been manners.'
Tavy, his night-shirt round his neck, sat down on the edge of the bed with
his mouth open.
'Come, don't look so silly,' said the Cat, taking a walk along the high
wooden mantelpiece,'any one would think you didn't like me to talk to
you.'
'I love you to,' said Tavy recovering himself a little.
'Well then,' said the Cat.
'May I touch you?' Tavy asked timidly.
'Of course! I belong to you. Look out!'The China Cat gathered herself
together and jumped. Tavy caught her.
It was quite a shock to find when one stroked her that the China Cat, though
alive, was still china, hard, cold, and smooth to the touch, and yet perfectly
brisk and absolutely bendable as any flesh and blood cat.
'Dear, dear white pussy,' said Tavy, 'I do love you.'
'And I love you,' purred the Cat, 'otherwise I should never have lowered
myself to begin a conversation.'
'I wish you were a real cat,' said Tavy.
[p153] 'I am,' said the Cat. 'Now how shall we amuse ourselves?
I suppose you don't care for sport-mousing, I mean?'
'I never tried,' said Tavy, 'and I think I rather wouldn't.'
'Very well then, Octavius,' said the Cat.'I'll take you to the White Cat's
Castle. Get into bed. Bed makes a good travelling carriage, especially when you
haven't any other. Shut your eyes.'
Tavy did as he was told. Shut his eyes, but could not keep them shut. He
opened them a tiny, tiny chink, and sprang up. He was not in bed. He was on a
couch of soft beast-skin, and the couch stood in a splendid hall, whose walls
were of gold and ivory. By him stood the White Cat, no longer china, but real
live cat-and fur-as cats should be.
'Here we are,' she said. 'The journey didn't take long, did it? Now we'll
have that splendid supper, out of the fairy tale, with the invisible hands
waiting on us.'
She clapped her paws-paws now as soft as white velvet-and a table-cloth
floated into the room; then knives and forks and spoons and glasses, the table
was laid, the dishes drifted in, and they began to eat. There happened to be
every single thing Tavy liked best to eat. After supper there was music and
singing, and[p154Tavy, having kissed a white,
soft, furry forehead, went to bed in a gold four-poster with a counterpane of
butterflies' wings. He awoke at home. On the mantelpiece sat the White Cat,
looking as though butter would not melt in her mouth. And all her furriness had
gone with her voice. She was silent-and china.
Tavy spoke to her. But she would not answer. Nor did she speak all day. Only
at night when he was getting into bed she suddenly mewed, stretched, and
said:
'Make haste, there's a play acted to-night at my castle.'
Tavy made haste, and was rewarded by another glorious evening in the castle
of the White Cat.
And so the weeks went on. Days full of an ordinary little boy's joys and
sorrows, goodnesses and badnesses. Nights spent by a little Prince in the Magic
Castle of the White Cat.
Then came the day when Tavy's mother spoke to him, and he, very scared and
serious, told the China Cat what she had said.
'I knew this would happen,' said the Cat.'It always does. So you're to leave
your house next week. Well, there's only one way out of the difficulty. Draw
your sword, Tavy, and cut off my head and tail.'
'And then will you turn into a Princess, and[p155shall I have to marry you?'
Tavy asked with horror.
'No, dear-no,' said the Cat reassuringly.'I sha'n't turn into anything. But
you and mother will turn into happy people. I shall just not be any
more-for you.'
'Then I won't do it,' said Tavy.
'But you must. Come, draw your sword, like a brave fairy Prince, and cut off
my head.'
The sword hung above his bed, with the helmet and breast-plate Uncle James
had given him last Christmas.
'I'm not a fairy Prince,' said the child.'I'm Tavy-and I love you.'
'You love your mother better,' said the Cat.'Come cut my head off. The story
always ends like that. You love mother best. It's for her sake.'
'Yes.' Tavy was trying to think it out.'Yes, I love mother best. But I love
you. And I won't cut off your head,-no, not even for mother.'
'Then,' said the Cat, 'I must do what I can!'
She stood up, waving her white china tail, and before Tavy could stop her she
had leapt, not, as before, into his arms, but on to the wide hearthstone.
It was all over-the China Cat lay broken
[p156inside the high brass fender. The sound of the smash brought
mother running.
'What is it?' she cried. 'Oh, Tavy-the China Cat!'
'She would do it,' sobbed Tavy. 'She wanted me to cut off her head'n I
wouldn't.'
'Don't talk nonsense, dear,' said mother sadly. 'That only makes it worse.
Pick up the pieces.'
'There's only two pieces,' said Tavy.'Couldn't you stick her together
again?'
'Why,' said mother, holding the pieces close to the candle. 'She's been
broken before. And mended.'
'I knew that,' said Tavy, still sobbing.'Oh, my dear White Cat, oh, oh, oh!'
The last 'oh' was a howl of anguish.
'Come, crying won't mend her,' said mother.'Look, there's another piece of
her, close to the shovel.'
Tavy stooped.
'That's not a piece of cat,' he said, and picked it up.
It was a pale parchment label, tied to a key. Mother held it to the candle
and read: 'Key of the lock behind the knot in the mantelpiece panel in the
white parlour.'
'Tavy! I wonder! But … where did it come from?'
[p157] 'Out of my White Cat, I s'pose,' said Tavy, his tears
stopping. 'Are you going to see what's in the mantelpiece panel, mother? Are
you? Oh, do let me come and see too!'
'You don't deserve,' mother began, and ended,-'Well, put your dressing-gown
on then.'
They went down the gallery past the pictures and the stuffed birds and tables
with china on them and downstairs on to the white parlour. But they could not
see any knot in the mantelpiece panel, because it was all painted white. But
mother's fingers felt softly all over it, and found a round raised spot. It was
a knot, sure enough. Then she scraped round it with her scissors, till she
loosened the knot, and poked it out with the scissors point.
'I don't suppose there's any keyhole there really,' she said. But there was.
And what is more, the key fitted. The panel swung open, and inside was a little
cupboard with two shelves. What was on the shelves? There were old laces and old
embroideries, old jewelry and old silver; there was money, and there were dusty
old papers that Tavy thought most uninteresting. But mother did not think them
uninteresting. She laughed, and cried, or nearly cried, and said:
[p158] 'Oh, Tavy, this was why the China Cat was to be taken
such care of!' Then she told him how, a hundred and fifty years before, the Head
of the House had gone out to fight for the Pretender, and had told his daughter
to take the greatest care of the China Cat. 'I will send you word of the reason
by a sure hand,' he said, for they parted on the open square, where any spy
might have overheard anything. And he had been killed by an ambush not ten miles
from home,-and his daughter had never known. But she had kept the Cat.
'And now it has saved us,' said mother.'We can stay in the dear old house,
and there are two other houses that will belong to us too, I think. And, oh,
Tavy, would you like some pound-cake and ginger-wine, dear?'
Tavy did like. And had it.
The China Cat was mended, but it was put in the glass-fronted corner cupboard
in the drawing-room, because it had saved the House.
Now I dare say you'll think this is all nonsense, and a made-up story. Not at
all. If it were, how would you account for Tavy's finding, the very next night,
fast asleep on his pillow, his own white Cat-the furry friend that the China Cat
used to turn into every[p159evening-the dear hostess who had amused him so well in the
White Cat's fairy Palace?
It was she, beyond a doubt, and that was why Tavy didn't mind a
bit about the China Cat being taken from him and kept under glass. You may think
that it was just any old stray white cat that had come in by accident. Tavy
knows better. It has the very same tender tone in its purr that the magic White
Cat had. It will not talk to Tavy, it is true; but Tavy can and does talk to it.
But the thing that makes it perfectly certain that it is the White Cat is that
the tips of its two ears are missing-just as the China Cat's ears were. If you
say that it might have lost its ear-tips in battle you are the kind of person
who alwaysmakes difficulties, and you may be quite sure that the kind
of splendid magics that happened to Tavy will never happen to you.
[p160] VII BELINDA AND BELLAMANT; OR THE BELLS OF
CARRILLON-LAND
There is a certain country where a king is never
allowed to reign while a queen can be found. They like queens much better than
kings in that country. I can't think why. If some one has tried to teach you a
little history, you will perhaps think that this is the Salic law. But it isn't.
In the biggest city of that odd country there is a great bell-tower (higher than
the clock-tower of the Houses of Parliament, where they put M.P.'s who forget
their manners). This bell-tower had seven bells in it, very sweet-toned
splendid bells, made expressly to ring on the joyful occasions when a princess
was born who would be queen some day. And the great tower was built expressly
for the bells to ring in. So you see what a lot they thought of queens in that
country. Now in all the bells there are bell-people-it is their voices that you
hear when[p161the bells ring. All that about
its being the clapper of the bell is mere nonsense, and would hardly deceive a
child. I don't know why people say such things. Most Bell-people are very
energetic busy folk, who love the sound of their own voices, and hate being
idle, and when nearly two hundred years had gone by, and no princesses had been
born, they got tired of living in bells that were never rung. So they slipped
out of the belfry one fine frosty night, and left the big beautiful bells empty,
and went off to find other homes. One of them went to live in a dinner-bell,
and one in a school-bell, and the rest all found homes-they did not mind
where-just anywhere, in fact, where they could find any Bell-person kind enough
to give them board and lodging. And every one was surprised at the increased
loudness in the voices of these hospitable bells. For, of course, the
Bell-people from the belfry did their best to help in the housework as polite
guests should, and always added their voices to those of their hosts on all
occasions when bell-talk was called for. And the seven big beautiful bells in
the belfry were left hollow and dark and quite empty, except for the
clappers who did not care about the comforts of a home.
Now of course a good house does not[p162remain empty long, especially when there is no rent to pay,
and in a very short time the seven bells all had tenants, and they were all the
kind of folk that no respectable Bell-people would care to be acquainted
with.
They had been turned out of other bells-cracked bells and broken bells, the
bells of horses that had been lost in snowstorms or of ships that had gone down
at sea. They hated work, and they were a glum, silent, disagreeable people, but
as far as they could be pleased about anything they were pleased to live in
bells that were never rung, in houses where there was nothing to do. They sat
hunched up under the black domes of their houses, dressed in darkness and
cobwebs, and their only pleasure was idleness, their only feasts the thick dusty
silence that lies heavy in all belfries where the bells never ring. They hardly
ever spoke even to each other, and in the whispers that good Bell-people talk in
among themselves, and that no one can hear but the bat whose ear for music is
very fine and who has himself a particularly high voice, and when they did speak
they quarrelled.
And when at last the bells were rung for the birth of a Princess the
wicked Bell-people were furious. Of course they had to ring-a bell
can't help that when the rope is pulled-but[p163their voices were so ugly that
people were quite shocked.
'What poor taste our ancestors must have had,' they said, 'to think these
were good bells!'
(You remember the bells had not rung for nearly two hundred years.)
'Dear me,' said the King to the Queen,'what odd ideas people had in the old
days. I always understood that these bells had beautiful voices.'
'They're quite hideous,' said the Queen. And so they were. Now that night the
lazy Bell-folk came down out of the belfry full of anger against the Princess
whose birth had disturbed their idleness. There is no anger like that of a lazy
person who is made to work against his will.
And they crept out of the dark domes of their houses and came down in their
dust dresses and cobweb cloaks, and crept up to the palace where every one had
gone to bed long before, and stood round the mother-of-pearl cradle where the
baby princess lay asleep. And they reached their seven dark right hands out
across the white satin coverlet, and the oldest and hoarsest and laziest
said:
'She shall grow uglier every day, except Sundays, and every Sunday she shall
be seven times prettier than the Sunday before.'
[p164] 'Why not uglier every day, and a double dose on Sunday?'
asked the youngest and spitefullest of the wicked Bell-people.
'Because there's no rule without an exception,'said the eldest and hoarsest
and laziest,'and she'll feel it all the more if she's pretty once a week. And,'
he added, 'this shall go on till she finds a bell that doesn't ring, and can't
ring, and never will ring, and wasn't made to ring.'
'Why not for ever?' asked the young and spiteful.
'Nothing goes on for ever,' said the eldest Bell-person, 'not even ill-luck.
And we have to leave her a way out. It doesn't matter. She'll never know what it
is. Let alone finding it.'
Then they went back to the belfry and rearranged as well as they could the
comfortable web-and-owls' nest furniture of their houses which had all been
shaken up and disarranged by that absurd ringing of bells at the birth of a
Princess that nobody could really be pleased about.
When the Princess was two weeks old the King said to the Queen:
'My love-the Princess is not so handsome as I thought she was.'
'Nonsense, Henry,' said the Queen, 'the light's not good, that's all.'
[p165] Next day-it was Sunday-the King pulled back the lace
curtains of the cradle and said:
'The light's good enough now-and you see she's--'
He stopped.
'It must have been the light,' he said, 'she looks all right
to-day.'
'Of course she does, a precious,' said the Queen.
But on Monday morning His Majesty was quite sure really that the Princess was
rather plain, for a Princess. And when Sunday came, and the Princess had on her
best robe and the cap with the little white ribbons in the frill, he rubbed his
nose and said there was no doubt dress did make a great deal of difference. For
the Princess was now as pretty as a new daisy.
The Princess was several years old before her mother could be got to see that
it really was better for the child to wear plain clothes and a veil on week
days. On Sundays, of course she could wear her best frock and a clean crown just
like anybody else.
Of course nobody ever told the Princess how ugly she was. She wore a veil on
week-days, and so did every one else in the palace, and she was never allowed to
look in the glass except on Sundays, so that she had[p166no
idea that she was not as pretty all the week as she was on the first day of it.
She grew up therefore quite contented. But the parents were in despair.
'Because,' said King Henry, 'it's high time she was married. We ought to
choose a king to rule the realm-I have always looked forward to her marrying at
twenty-one-and to our retiring on a modest competence to some nice little place
in the country where we could have a few pigs.'
'And a cow,' said the Queen, wiping her eyes.
'And a pony and trap,' said the King.
'And hens,' said the Queen, 'yes. And now it can never, never be. Look at the
child! I just ask you! Look at her!'
'No,' said the King firmly, 'I haven't done that since she was ten,
except on Sundays.'
'Couldn't we get a prince to agree to a“Sundays only” marriage-not let him
see her during the week?'
'Such an unusual arrangement,' said the King, 'would involve very awkward
explanations, and I can't think of any except the true ones, which would be
quite impossible to give. You see, we should want a first-class prince, and no
really high-toned Highness would take a wife on those terms.'
[p167] 'It's a thoroughly comfortable kingdom,'said the Queen
doubtfully. 'The young man would be handsomely provided for for life.'
'I couldn't marry Belinda to a time-server or a place-worshipper,' said the
King decidedly.
Meanwhile the Princess had taken the matter into her own hands. She had
fallen in love.
You know, of course, that a handsome book is sent out every year to all the
kings who have daughters to marry. It is rather like the illustrated catalogues
of Liberty's or Peter Robinson's, only instead of illustrations showing
furniture or ladies' cloaks and dresses, the pictures are all of princes who
are of an age to be married, and are looking out for suitable wives. The book is
called the 'Royal Match Catalogue Illustrated,'-and besides the pictures of the
princes it has little printed bits about their incomes, accomplishments,
prospects, and tempers, and relations.
Now the Princess saw this book-which is never shown to princesses, but only
to their parents-it was carelessly left lying on the round table in the parlour.
She looked all through it, and she hated each prince more than the one before
till she came to the very end, and on the last page of all,[p168screwed away in a corner, was the picture of a prince who was
quite as good-looking as a prince has any call to be.
'I like you,' said Belinda softly. Then she read the little bit of
print underneath.
Prince Bellamant, aged twenty-four. Wants Princess who doesn't object to a
christening curse. Nature of curse only revealed in the strictest confidence.
Good tempered. Comfortably off. Quiet habits. No relations.
'Poor dear,' said the Princess. 'I wonder what the curse is! I'm sure
I shouldn't mind!'
The blue dusk of evening was deepening in the garden outside. The Princess
rang for the lamp and went to draw the curtain. There was a rustle and a faint
high squeak-and something black flopped on to the floor and fluttered there.
'Oh-it's a bat,' cried the Princess, as the lamp came in. 'I don't like
bats.'
'Let me fetch a dust-pan and brush and sweep the nasty thing away,' said the
parlourmaid.
'No, no,' said Belinda, 'it's hurt, poor dear,'and though she hated bats she
picked it up. It was horribly cold to touch, one wing dragged loosely. 'You can
go, Jane,' said the Princess to the parlourmaid.
Then she got a big velvet-covered box[p169that had had chocolate in it,
and put some cotton wool in it and said to the Bat-
'You poor dear, is that comfortable?' and the Bat said:
'Quite, thanks.'
'Good gracious,' said the Princess jumping.'I didn't know bats could
talk.'
'Every one can talk,' said the Bat, 'but not every one can hear other people
talking. You have a fine ear as well as a fine heart.'
'Will your wing ever get well?' asked the Princess.
'I hope so,' said the Bat. 'But let's talk
about you. Do you know why you wear a veil every day except Sundays?'
'Doesn't everybody?' asked Belinda.
'Only here in the palace,' said the Bat,'that's on your account.'
'But why?' asked the Princess.
'Look in the glass and you'll know.'
'But it's wicked to look in the glass except on Sundays-and besides they're
all put away,'said the Princess.
'If I were you,' said the Bat, 'I should go up into the attic where the
youngest kitchenmaid sleeps. Feel between the thatch and the wall just above her
pillow, and you'll find a little round looking-glass. But come back here before
you look at it.'
[p170] The Princess did exactly what the Bat told her to do, and
when she had come back into the parlour and shut the door she looked in the
little round glass that the youngest kitchen-maid's sweetheart had given her.
And when she saw her ugly, ugly, ugly face-for you must remember she had been
growing uglier every day since she was born-she screamed and then she said:
'That's not me, it's a horrid picture.'
'It is you, though,' said the Bat firmly but kindly; 'and now you
see why you wear a veil all the week-and only look in the glass on Sunday.'
'But why,' asked the Princess in tears, 'why don't I look like that in the
Sunday looking-glasses?'
'Because you aren't like that on Sundays,'the Bat replied. 'Come,' it went
on, 'stop crying. I didn't tell you the dread secret of your ugliness just to
make you cry-but because I know the way for you to be as pretty all the week as
you are on Sundays, and since you've been so kind to me I'll tell you. Sit down
close beside me, it fatigues me to speak loud.'
The Princess did, and listened through her veil and her tears, while the Bat
told her all that I began this story by telling you.
'My great-great-great-great-grandfather heard the tale years ago,' he said,
'up in the[p171dark, dusty, beautiful,
comfortable, cobwebby belfry, and I have heard scraps of it myself when the evil
Bell-people were quarrelling, or talking in their sleep, lazy things!'
'It's very good of you to tell me all this,'said Belinda, 'but what am I to
do?'
'You must find the bell that doesn't ring, and can't ring, and never will
ring, and wasn't made to ring.'
'If I were a prince,' said the Princess, 'I could go out and seek my
fortune.'
'Princesses have fortunes as well as princes,'said the Bat.
'But father and mother would never let me go and look for mine.'
'Think!' said the Bat, 'perhaps you'll find a way.'
So Belinda thought and thought. And at last she got the book that had the
portraits of eligible princes in it, and she wrote to the prince who had the
christening curse-and this is what she said:
'Princess Belinda of Carrillon-land is not afraid of
christening curses. If Prince Bellamant would like to marry her he had better
apply to her Royal Father in the usual way.
'P.S.-I have seen your portrait.'
When the Prince got this letter he was very[p172pleased, and wrote at once for
Princess Belinda's likeness. Of course they sent him a picture of her Sunday
face, which was the most beautiful face in the world. As soon as he saw it he
knew that this was not only the most beautiful face in the world, but the
dearest, so he wrote to her father by the next post-applying for her hand in the
usual way and enclosing the most respectable references. The King told the
Princess.
'Come,' said he, 'what do you say to this young man?'
And the Princess, of course, said, 'Yes, please.'
So the wedding-day was fixed for the first Sunday in June.
But when the Prince arrived with all his glorious following of courtiers and
men-at-arms, with two pink peacocks and a crown-case full of diamonds for his
bride, he absolutely refused to be married on a Sunday. Nor would he give any
reason for his refusal. And then the King lost his temper and broke off the
match, and the Prince went away.
But he did not go very far. That night he bribed a page-boy to show him which
was the Princess's room, and he climbed up by the jasmine through the dark
rose-scented night, and tapped at the window.
[p173] 'Who's dhere?' said the Princess inside in the dark.
'Me,' said the Prince in the dark outside.
'Thed id wasnd't true?' said the Princess.'They toad be you'd ridded
away.'
'What a cold you've got, my Princess,' said the Prince hanging on by the
jasmine boughs.
'It's not a cold,' sniffed the Princess.
'Then … oh you dear … were you crying because you thought I'd gone?' he
said.
'I suppose so,' said she.
He said, 'You dear!' again, and kissed her hands.
'Why wouldn't you be married on a Sunday?' she asked.
'It's the curse, dearest,' he explained, 'I couldn't tell any one but you.
The fact is Malevola wasn't asked to my christening so she doomed me to be …
well, she said“moderately good-looking all the week, and too ugly for words on
Sundays.” So you see! You will be married on a week-day, won't
you?'
'But I can't,' said the Princess, 'because I've got a curse too-only I'm ugly
all the week and pretty on Sundays.'
'How extremely tiresome,' said the Prince,'but can't you be cured?'
[p174] 'Oh yes,' said the Princess, and told him how. 'And you,'
she asked, 'is yours quite incurable?'
'Not at all,' he answered, 'I've only got to stay under water for five
minutes and the spell will be broken. But you see, beloved, the difficulty is
that I can't do it. I've practised regularly, from a boy, in the sea, and in the
swimming bath, and even in my wash-hand basin-hours at a time I've
practised-but I never can keep under more than two minutes.'
'Oh dear,' said the Princess, 'this is dreadful.'
'It is rather trying,' the Prince answered.
'You're sure you like me,' she asked suddenly, 'now you know that I'm only
pretty once a week?'
'I'd die for you,' said he.
'Then I'll tell you what. Send all your courtiers away, and take a situation
as under-gardener here-I know we want one. And then every night I'll climb down
the jasmine and we'll go out together and seek our fortune. I'm sure we shall
find it.'
And they did go out. The very next night, and the next, and the next, and the
next, and the next, and the next. And they did not find their fortunes, but they
got fonder and fonder of each other. They could not see each other's[p175faces, but they held hands as
they went along through the dark.
And on the seventh night, as they passed by a house that showed chinks of
light through its shutters, they heard a bell being rung outside for supper, a
bell with a very loud and beautiful voice. But instead of saying-
'Supper's ready,' as any one would have expected, the bell was saying-
Ding dong dell!
I could tell
Where you ought to go
To break the spell.
Then some one left off ringing the bell, so of course it couldn't say any
more. So the two went on. A little way down the road a cow-bell tinkled behind
the wet hedge of the lane. And it said-not, 'Here I am, quite safe,' as a
cow-bell should, but-
Ding dong dell
All will be well
If you…
Then the cow stopped walking and began to eat, so the bell couldn't say any
more. The Prince and Princess went on, and you will not be surprised to hear
that they heard the voices of five more bells that night. The next was a
school-bell. The schoolmaster's little boy[p176thought it would be fun to ring
it very late at night-but his father came and caught him before the bell could
say any more than-
Ding a dong dell
You can break up the spell
By taking…
So that was no good.
Then there were the three bells that were the sign over the door of an inn
where people were happily dancing to a fiddle, because there was a wedding.
These bells said:
We are the
Merry three
Bells, bells, bells.
You are two
To undo
Spells, spells, spells…
Then the wind who was swinging the bells suddenly thought of an appointment
he had made with a pine forest, to get up an entertaining imitation of sea-waves
for the benefit of the forest nymphs who had never been to the seaside, and he
went off-so, of course, the bells couldn't ring any more, and the Prince and
Princess went on down the dark road.
There was a cottage and the Princess pulled her veil closely over her face,
for yellow light streamed from its open door-and it was a Wednesday.
[p177] Inside a little boy was sitting on the floor-quite a
little boy-he ought to have been in bed long before, and I don't know why he
wasn't. And he was ringing a little tinkling bell that had dropped off a
sleigh.
And this little bell said:
Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, I'm a little
sleigh-bell,
But I know what I know, and I'll tell, tell,
tell.
Find the Enchanter of the Ringing Well,
He will show you how to break the spell, spell,
spell.
Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, I'm a little
sleigh-bell,
But I know what I know….
And so on, over and over, again and again, because the little
boy was quite contented to go on shaking his sleigh-bell for ever and ever.
'So now we know,' said the Prince, 'isn't that glorious?'
'Yes, very, but where's the Enchanter of the Ringing Well?' said the Princess
doubtfully.
'Oh, I've got his address in my pocket-book,'said the Prince. 'He's
my god-father. He was one of the references I gave your father.'
So the next night the Prince brought a horse to the garden, and he and the
Princess mounted, and rode, and rode, and rode, and in the grey dawn they came
to Wonderwood, and[p178in
the very middle of that the Magician's Palace stands.
The Princess did not like to call on a perfect stranger so very early in the
morning, so they decided to wait a little and look about them.
The castle was very beautiful, decorated with a conventional design of bells
and bell ropes, carved in white stone.
Luxuriant plants of American bell-vine covered the drawbridge and portcullis.
On a green lawn in front of the castle was a well, with a curious bell-shaped
covering suspended over it. The lovers leaned over the mossy fern-grown wall of
the well, and, looking down, they could see that the narrowness of the well only
lasted for a few feet, and below that it spread into a cavern where water lay in
a big pool.
'What cheer?' said a pleasant voice behind them. It was the Enchanter, an
early riser, like Darwin was, and all other great scientific men.
They told him what cheer.
'But,' Prince Bellamant ended, 'it's really no use. I can't keep under water
more than two minutes however much I try. And my precious Belinda's not likely
to find any silly old bell that doesn't ring, and can't ring, and never will
ring, and was never made to ring.'
[p179] 'Ho, ho,' laughed the Enchanter with the soft full
laughter of old age. 'You've come to the right shop. Who told you?'
'The bells,' said Belinda.
'Ah, yes.' The old man frowned kindly upon them. 'You must be very fond of
each other?'
'We are,' said the two together.
'Yes,' the Enchanter answered, 'because only true lovers can hear the true
speech of the bells, and then only when they're together. Well, there's the
bell!'
He pointed to the covering of the well, went forward, and touched some lever
or spring. The covering swung out from above the well, and hung over the grass
grey with the dew of dawn.
'That?' said Bellamant.
'That,' said his god-father. 'It doesn't ring, and it can't ring, and it
never will ring, and it was never made to ring. Get into it.'
'Eh?' said Bellamant forgetting his manners.
The old man took a hand of each and led them under the bell.
They looked up. It had windows of thick glass, and high seats about four feet
from its edge, running all round inside.
'Take your seats,' said the Enchanter.
Bellamant lifted his Princess to the bench and leaped up beside her.
[p180] 'Now,' said the old man, 'sit still, hold each other's
hands, and for your lives don't move.'
He went away, and next moment they felt the bell swing in the air. It swung
round till once more it was over the well, and then it went down, down,
down.
'I'm not afraid, with you,' said Belinda, because she was, dreadfully.
Down went the bell. The glass windows leaped into light, looking through them
the two could see blurred glories of lamps in the side of the cave, magic lamps,
or perhaps merely electric, which, curiously enough have ceased to seem magic to
us nowadays. Then with a plop the lower edge of the bell met the water, the
water rose inside it, a little, then not any more. And the bell went down, down,
and above their heads the green water lapped against the windows of the
bell.
'You're under water-if we stay five minutes,'Belinda whispered.
'Yes, dear,' said Bellamant, and pulled out his ruby-studded chronometer.
'It's five minutes for you, but oh!' cried Belinda, 'it's now for
me. For I've found the bell that doesn't ring, and can't ring, and never will
ring, and wasn't made to ring. Oh Bellamant dearest, it's Thursday.
Have I got my Sunday face?'
[p181] She tore away her veil, and his eyes, fixed upon her
face, could not leave it.
'Oh dream of all the world's delight,' he murmured, 'how beautiful you
are.'
Neither spoke again till a sudden little shock told them that the bell was
moving up again.
'Nonsense,' said Bellamant, 'it's not five minutes.'
But when they looked at the ruby-studded chronometer, it was nearly
three-quarters of an hour. But then, of course, the well was enchanted!
'Magic? Nonsense,' said the old man when they hung about him with thanks and
pretty words. 'It's only a diving-bell. My own invention.'
* * * * *
So they went home and were married, and the Princess did not wear a veil at
the wedding. She said she had had enough veils to last her time.
* * * * *
And a year and a day after that a little daughter was born to them.
'Now sweetheart,' said King Bellamant-he was king now because the old king
and queen had retired from the business, and were keeping pigs and hens in the
country as they[p182had
always planned to do-'dear sweetheart and life's love, I am going to ring the
bells with my own hands, to show how glad I am for you, and for the child, and
for our good life together.'
So he went out. It was very dark, because the baby princess had chosen to be
born at midnight.
The King went out to the belfry, that stood in the great, bare, quiet,
moonlit square, and he opened the door. The furry-pussy bell-ropes, like huge
caterpillars, hung on the first loft. The King began to climb the curly-wurly
stone stair. And as he went up he heard a noise, the strangest noises, stamping
and rustling and deep breathings.
He stood still in the ringers' loft where the pussy-furry caterpillary
bell-robes hung, and from the belfry above he heard the noise of strong
fighting, and mixed with it the sound of voices angry and desperate, but with a
noble note that thrilled the soul of the hearer like the sound of the trumpet in
battle. And the voices cried:
Down, down-away, away,
When good has come ill may not stay,
Out, out, into the night,
The belfry bells are ours by right!
[p183] And the words broke and joined again, like water when it
flows against the piers of a bridge. 'Down, down--.'
'Ill may notstay--.' 'Good has come--.' 'Away,away--.' And the
joining came like the sound of the river that flows free again.
Out, out, into the night,
The belfry bells are ours by right!
And then, as King Bellamant stood there, thrilled and yet, as it were, turned
to stone, by the magic of this conflict that raged above him, there came a
sweeping rush down the belfry ladder. The lantern he carried showed him a rout
of little, dark, evil people, clothed in dust and cobwebs, that scurried down
the wooden steps gnashing their teeth and growling in the bitterness of a
deserved defeat. They passed and there was silence. Then the King flew from rope
to rope pulling lustily, and from above, the bells answered in their own clear
beautiful voices-because the good Bell-folk had driven out the usurpers and had
come to their own again.
Ring-a-ring-a-ring-a-ring-a-ring! Ring,
bell!
A little baby comes on earth to dwell. Ring,
bell!
Sound, bell! Sound! Swell!
Ring for joy and wish her well!
No tale of ill-spell!
Ring, bell! Joy, bell! Love, bell!
Ring!
* * * * *
'But I don't see,' said King Bellamant, when he had told Queen Belinda all
about it,'how it was that I came to hear them. The Enchanter of the Ringing Well
said that only lovers could hear what the bells had to say, and then only when
they were together.'
'You silly dear boy,' said Queen Belinda, cuddling the baby princess close
under her chin, 'we are lovers, aren't we? And you don't suppose I
wasn't with you when you went to ring the bells for our baby-my heart and soul
anyway-all of me that matters!'
'Yes,' said the King, 'of course you were. That accounts!'
[p185] VIII JUSTNOWLAND
'Auntie! No, no, no! I will be good. Oh, I will!'
The little weak voice came from the other side of the locked attic door.
'You should have thought of that before,'said the strong, sharp voice
outside.
'I didn't mean to be naughty. I didn't, truly.'
'It's not what you mean, miss, it's what you do. I'll teach you not to mean,
my lady.'
The bitter irony of the last words dried the child's tears. 'Very well,
then,' she screamed,'I won't be good; I won't try to be good. I thought you'd
like your nasty old garden weeded. I only did it to please you. How was I to
know it was turnips? It looked just like weeds.' Then came a pause, then another
shriek. 'Oh, Auntie, don't! Oh, let me out-let me out!'
'I'll not let you out till I've broken your spirit, my girl; you may rely on
that.'
[p186] The sharp voice stopped abruptly on a high note;
determined feet in strong boots sounded on the stairs-fainter, fainter; a door
slammed below with a dreadful definiteness, and Elsie was left alone, to wonder
how soon her spirit would break-for at no less a price, it appeared, could
freedom be bought.
The outlook seemed hopeless. The martyrs and heroines, with whom Elsie
usually identified herself, their spirit had never been broken; not
chains nor the rack nor the fiery stake itself had even weakened them.
Imprisonment in an attic would to them have been luxury compared with the
boiling oil and the smoking faggots and all the intimate cruelties of mysterious
instruments of steel and leather, in cold dungeons, lit only by the dull flare
of torches and the bright, watchful eyes of inquisitors.
A month in the house of 'Auntie' self-styled, and really only an unrelated
Mrs. Staines, paid to take care of the child, had held but one interest-Foxe's
Book of Martyrs. It was a horrible book-the thick oleographs, their guarding
sheets of tissue paper sticking to the prints like bandages to a wound…. Elsie
knew all about wounds: she had had one herself. Only a scalded hand, it is
true, but a wound is a wound, all the world over. It was[p187a
book that made you afraid to go to bed; but it was a book you could not help
reading. And now it seemed as though it might at last help, and not merely
sicken and terrify. But the help was frail, and broke almost instantly on the
thought-'They were brave because they were good: how can I be brave
when there's nothing to be brave about except me not knowing the difference
between turnips and weeds?'
She sank down, a huddled black bunch on the bare attic floor, and called
wildly to some one who could not answer her. Her frock was black because the one
who always used to answer could not answer any more. And her father was in
India, where you cannot answer, or even hear, your little girl, however much she
cries in England.
'I won't cry,' said Elsie, sobbing as violently as ever. 'I can be brave,
even if I'm not a saint but only a turnip-mistaker. I'll be a Bastille prisoner,
and tame a mouse!' She dried her eyes, though the bosom of the black frock still
heaved like the sea after a storm, and looked about for a mouse to tame. One
could not begin too soon. But unfortunately there seemed to be no mouse at
liberty just then. There were mouse-holes right enough, all round the wainscot,
and in the broad, time-worn[p188boards of the old floor. But never a mouse.
'Mouse, mouse!' Elsie called softly. 'Mousie, mousie, come and be tamed!'
Not a mouse replied.
The attic was perfectly empty and dreadfully clean. The other attic, Elsie
knew, had lots of interesting things in it-old furniture and saddles, and sacks
of seed potatoes,-but in this attic nothing. Not so much as a bit of string on
the floor that one could make knots in, or twist round one's finger till it made
the red ridges that are so interesting to look at afterwards; not even a piece
of paper in the draughty, cold fireplace that one could make paper boats of, or
prick letters in with a pin or the tag of one's shoe-laces.
As she stooped to see whether under the grate some old match-box or bit of
twig might have escaped the broom, she saw suddenly what she had wanted most-a
mouse. It was lying on its side. She put out her hand very slowly and gently,
and whispered in her softest tones, 'Wake up, Mousie, wake up, and come and be
tamed.' But the mouse never moved. And when she took it in her hand it was
cold.
'Oh,' she moaned, 'you're dead, and now I can never tame you'; and she sat on
the cold[p189hearth and cried again, with
the dead mouse in her lap.
'Don't cry,' said somebody. 'I'll find you something to tame-if you really
want it.'
Elsie started and saw the head of a black bird peering at her through the
square opening that leads to the chimney. The edges of him looked ragged and
rainbow-coloured, but that was because she saw him through tears. To a tearless
eye he was black and very smooth and sleek.
'Oh!' she said, and nothing more.
'Quite so,' said the bird politely. 'You are surprised to hear me speak, but
your surprise will be, of course, much less when I tell you that I am really a
Prime Minister condemned by an Enchanter to wear the form of a crow till … till
I can get rid of it.'
'Oh!' said Elsie.
'Yes, indeed,' said the Crow, and suddenly grew smaller till he could come
comfortably through the square opening. He did this, perched on the top bar, and
hopped to the floor. And there he got bigger and bigger, and bigger and bigger
and bigger. Elsie had scrambled to her feet, and then a black little girl of
eight and of the usual size stood face to face with a crow as big as a man, and
no doubt as old. She found words then.
[p190] 'Oh, don't!' she cried. 'Don't get any bigger. I can't
bear it.'
'I can't do it,' said the Crow kindly, 'so that's all
right. I thought you'd better get used to seeing rather large crows before I
take you to Crownowland. We are all life-size there.'
'But a crow's life-size isn't a man's life-size,'Elsie managed to say.
'Oh yes, it is-when it's an enchanted Crow,' the bird replied. 'That makes
all the difference. Now you were saying you wanted to tame something. If you'll
come with me to Crownowland I'll show you something worth taming.'
'Is Crow-what's-its-name a nice place?'
Elsie asked cautiously. She was, somehow, not so very frightened now.
'Very,' said the Crow.
'Then perhaps I shall like it so much I sha'n't want to be taming
things.'
'Oh yes, you will, when you know how much depends on it.'
'But I shouldn't like,' said Elsie, 'to go up the chimney. This isn't my best
frock, of course, but still….'
'Quite so,' said the Crow. 'I only came that way for fun, and because I can
fly. You shall go in by the chief gate of the kingdom, like a lady. Do
come.'
[p191] But Elsie still hesitated. 'What sort of thing is it you
want me to tame?' she said doubtfully.
The enormous crow hesitated. 'A-a sort of lizard,' it said at last. 'And if
you can only tame it so that it will do what you tell it to, you'll save the
whole kingdom, and we'll put up a statue to you; but not in the People's Park,
unless they wish it,' the bird added mysteriously.
'I should like to save a kingdom,' said Elsie,'and I like lizards. I've seen
lots of them in India.'
'Then you'll come?' said the Crow.
'Yes. But how do we go?'
'There are only two doors out of this world into another,' said the Crow.
'I'll take you through the nearest. Allow me!' It put its wing round her so that
her face nestled against the black softness of the under-wing feathers. It was
warm and dark and sleepy there, and very comfortable. For a moment she seemed to
swim easily in a soft sea of dreams. Then, with a little shock, she found
herself standing on a marble terrace, looking out over a city far more beautiful
and wonderful than she had ever seen or imagined. The great man-sized Crow was
by her side.
'Now,' it said, pointing with the longest of[p192its long black wing-feathers,
'you see this beautiful city?'
'Yes,' said Elsie, 'of course I do.'
'Well … I hardly like to tell you the story,' said the Crow, 'but it's a long
time ago, and I hope you won't think the worse of us-because we're really very
sorry.'
'If you're really sorry,' said Elsie primly,'of course it's all right.'
'Unfortunately it isn't,' said the Crow.'You see the great square down
there?'
Elsie looked down on a square of green trees, broken a little towards the
middle.
'Well, that's where the … where it is-what you've got to tame, you
know.'
'But what did you do that was wrong?'
'We were unkind,' said the Crow slowly,'and unjust, and ungenerous. We had
servants and workpeople doing everything for us; we had nothing to do
but be kind. And we weren't.'
'Dear me,' said Elsie feebly.
'We had several warnings,' said the Crow.'There was an old parchment, and it
said just how you ought to behave and all that. But we didn't care what it said.
I was Court Magician as well as Prime Minister, and I ought to have known
better, but I didn't. We all wore frock-coats and high hats then,' he added
sadly.
[p193] 'Go on,' said Elsie, her eyes wandering from one
beautiful building to another of the many that nestled among the trees of the
city.
'And the old parchment said that if we didn't behave well our bodies would
grow like our souls. But we didn't think so. And then all in a minute they
did-and we were crows, and our bodies were as black as our souls. Our
souls are quite white now,' it added reassuringly.
'But what was the dreadful thing you'd done?'
'We'd been unkind to the people who worked for us-not given them enough food
or clothes or fire, and at last we took away even their play. There was a big
park that the people played in, and we built a wall round it and took it for
ourselves, and the King was going to set a statue of himself up in the middle.
And then before we could begin to enjoy it we were turned into big black crows;
and the working people into big white pigeons-andthey can go where they
like, but we have to stay here till we've tamed the…. We never can go into the
park, until we've settled the thing that guards it. And that thing's a big big
lizard-in fact … it's a dragon!'
'Oh!' cried Elsie; but she was not as frightened as the Crow seemed
to expect.[p194Because every now and then she
had felt sure that she was really safe in her own bed, and that this was a
dream. It was not a dream, but the belief that it was made her very brave, and
she felt quite sure that she could settle a dragon, if necessary-a dream dragon,
that is. And the rest of the time she thought about Foxe's Book of Martyrs and
what a heroine she now had the chance to be.
'You want me to kill it?' she asked.
'Oh no! To tame it,' said the Crow.
'We've tried all sorts of means-long whips, like people tame horses with, and
red-hot bars, such as lion-tamers use-and it's all been perfectly useless; and
there the dragon lives, and will live till some one can tame him and get him to
follow them like a tame fawn, and eat out of their hand.'
'What does the dragon like to eat?' Elsie asked.
'Crows,' replied the other in an uncomfortable whisper. 'At least
I've never known it eat anything else!'
'Am I to try to tame it now?' Elsie asked.
'Oh dear no,' said the Crow. 'We'll have a banquet in your honour, and you
shall have tea with the Princess.'
'How do you know who is a princess and who's not, if you're all crows?' Elsie
cried.
[p195] 'How do you know one human being from another?' the Crow
replied. 'Besides …Come on to the Palace.'
It led her along the terrace, and down some marble steps to a small arched
door. 'The tradesmen's entrance,' it explained. 'Excuse it-the courtiers are
crowding in by the front door.' Then through long corridors and passages they
went, and at last into the throne-room. Many crows stood about in respectful
attitudes. On the golden throne, leaning a gloomy head upon the first joint of
his right wing, the Sovereign of Crownowland was musing dejectedly. A little
girl of about Elsie's age sat on the steps of the throne nursing a handsome
doll.
'Who is the little girl?' Elsie asked.
'Curtsey! That's the Princess,' the Prime Minister Crow whispered;
and Elsie made the best curtsey she could think of in such a hurry.'She wasn't
wicked enough to be turned into a crow, or poor enough to be turned into a
pigeon, so she remains a dear little girl, just as she always was.'
The Princess dropped her doll and ran down the steps of the throne to meet
Elsie.
'You dear!' she said. 'You've come to play with me, haven't you? All the
little girls I used to play with have turned into crows, and[p196their beaks are so
awkward at doll's tea-parties, and wings are no good to nurse dollies with.
Let's have a doll's tea-party now, shall we?'
'May we?' Elsie looked at the Crow King, who nodded his head hopelessly. So,
hand in hand, they went.
I wonder whether you have ever had the run of a perfectly beautiful palace
and a nursery absolutely crammed with all the toys you ever had or wanted to
have: dolls' houses, dolls'china tea-sets, rocking-horses, bricks, nine-pins,
paint-boxes, conjuring tricks, pewter dinner-services, and any number of
dolls-all most agreeable and distinguished. If you have, you may perhaps be able
faintly to imagine Elsie's happiness. And better than all the toys was the
Princess Perdona-so gentle and kind and jolly, full of ideas for games, and
surrounded by the means for playing them. Think of it, after that bare attic,
with not even a bit of string to play with, and no company but the poor little
dead mouse!
There is no room in this story to tell you of all the games they had. I can
only say that the time went by so quickly that they never noticed it going, and
were amazed when the Crown nursemaid brought in the royal tea-tray. Tea was a
beautiful meal-with pink iced cake in it.
[p197] Now, all the time that these glorious games had been
going on, and this magnificent tea, the wisest crows of Crownowland had been
holding a council. They had decided that there was no time like the present,
and that Elsie had better try to tame the dragon soon as late. 'But,' the King
said, 'she mustn't run any risks. A guard of fifty stalwart crows must go with
her, and if the dragon shows the least temper, fifty crows must throw themselves
between her and danger, even if it cost fifty-one crow-lives. For I myself will
lead that band. Who will volunteer?'
Volunteers, to the number of some thousands, instantly stepped forward, and
the Field Marshal selected fifty of the strongest crows.
And then, in the pleasant pinkness of the sunset, Elsie was led out on to the
palace steps, where the King made a speech and said what a heroine she was, and
how like Joan of Arc. And the crows who had gathered from all parts of the town
cheered madly. Did you ever hear crows cheering? It is a wonderful sound.
Then Elsie got into a magnificent gilt coach, drawn by eight white horses,
with a crow at the head of each horse. The Princess sat with her on the blue
velvet cushions and held her hand.
[p198] 'I know you'll do it,' said she; 'you're so
brave and clever, Elsie!'
And Elsie felt braver than before, although now it did not seem so like a
dream. But she thought of the martyrs, and held Perdona's hand very tight.
At the gates of the green park the Princess kissed and hugged her new
friend-her state crown, which she had put on in honour of the occasion, got
pushed quite on one side in the warmth of her embrace-and Elsie stepped out of
the carriage. There was a great crowd of crows round the park gates, and every
one cheered and shouted 'Speech, speech!'
Elsie got as far as 'Ladies and gentlemen-Crows, I mean,' and then she could
not think of anything more, so she simply added,'Please, I'm ready.'
I wish you could have heard those crows cheer.
But Elsie wouldn't have the escort.
'It's very kind,' she said, 'but the dragon only eats crows, and I'm not a
crow, thank goodness-I mean I'm not a crow-and if I've got to be brave I'd like
to be brave, and none of you to get eaten. If only some one will come
with me to show me the way and then run back as hard as he can when we get near
the dragon. Please!'
[p199] 'If only one goes I shall be the one,' said the
King. And he and Elsie went through the great gates side by side. She held the
end of his wing, which was the nearest they could get to hand in hand.
The crowd outside waited in breathless silence. Elsie and the King went on
through the winding paths of the People's Park. And by the winding paths they
came at last to the Dragon. He lay very peacefully on a great stone slab, his
enormous bat-like wings spread out on the grass and his goldy-green scales
glittering in the pretty pink sunset light.
'Go back!' said Elsie.
'No,' said the King.
'If you don't,' said Elsie, 'I won't go on. Seeing a crow
might rouse him to fury, or give him an appetite, or something. Do-do go!'
So he went, but not far. He hid behind a tree, and from its shelter he
watched.
Elsie drew a long breath. Her heart was thumping under the black frock.
'Suppose,'she thought, 'he takes me for a crow!' But she thought how yellow her
hair was, and decided that the dragon would be certain to notice that.
'Quick march!' she said to herself, 'remember Joan of Arc,' and walked right
up to[p200the dragon. It never moved, but watched her suspiciously out
of its bright green eyes.
'Dragon dear!' she said in her clear little voice.
'Eh?' said the dragon, in tones of extreme astonishment.
'Dragon dear,' she repeated, 'do you like sugar?'
'Yes,' said the dragon.
'Well, I've brought you some. You won't hurt me if I bring it to you?'
The dragon violently shook its vast head.
'It's not much,' said Elsie, 'but I saved it at tea-time. Four lumps. Two for
each of my mugs of milk.'
She laid the sugar on the stone slab by the dragon's paw.
It turned its head towards the sugar. The pinky sunset light fell on its
face, and Elsie saw that it was weeping! Great fat tears as big as prize pears
were coursing down its wrinkled cheeks.
'Oh, don't,' said Elsie, 'don't cry! Poor dragon, what's the
matter?'
'Oh!' sobbed the dragon, 'I'm only so glad you've come. I-I've been so
lonely. No one to love me. You do love me, don't you?'
'I-I'm sure I shall when I know you better,' said Elsie kindly.
[p201] 'Give me a kiss, dear,' said the dragon, sniffing.
It is no joke to kiss a dragon. But Elsie did it-somewhere on the hard green
wrinkles of its forehead.
'Oh, thank you,' said the dragon, brushing away its tears with the
tip of its tail. 'That breaks the charm. I can move now. And I've got back all
my lost wisdom. Come along-Ido want my tea!'
So, to the waiting crowd at the gate came Elsie and the dragon side by side.
And at sight of the dragon, tamed, a great shout went up from the crowd; and at
that shout each one in the crowd turned quickly to the next one-for it was the
shout of men, and not of crows. Because at the first sight of the dragon, tamed,
they had left off being crows for ever and ever, and once again were men.
The King came running through the gates, his royal robes held high, so that
he shouldn't trip over them, and he too was no longer a crow, but a man.
And what did Elsie feel after being so brave? Well, she felt that she would
like to cry, and also to laugh, and she felt that she loved not only the dragon,
but every man, woman, and child in the whole world-even Mrs. Staines.
[p202] She rode back to the Palace on the dragon's back.
And as they went the crowd of citizens who had been crows met the crowd of
citizens who had been pigeons, and these were poor men in poor clothes.
It would have done you good to see how the ones who had been rich and crows
ran to meet the ones who had been pigeons and poor.
'Come and stay at my house, brother,' they cried to those who had no homes.
'Brother, I have many coats, come and choose some,' they cried to the ragged.
'Come and feast with me!' they cried to all. And the rich and the poor went off
arm in arm to feast and be glad that night, and the next day to work side by
side. 'For,' said the King, speaking with his hand on the neck of the tamed
dragon, 'our land has been called Crownowland. But we are no longer crows. We
are men: and we will be Just men. And our country shall be called Justnowland
for ever and ever. And for the future we shall not be rich and poor, but
fellow-workers, and each will do his best for his brothers and his own city. And
your King shall be your servant!'
I don't know how they managed this, but no one seemed to think that there
would be any difficulty about it when the King[p203mentioned it; and when people
really make up their minds to do anything, difficulties do most oddly
disappear.
Wonderful rejoicings there were. The city was hung with flags and lamps.
Bands played-the performers a little out of practice, because, of course, crows
can't play the flute or the violin or the trombone-but the effect was very gay
indeed. Then came the time-it was quite dark-when the King rose up on his throne
and spoke; and Elsie, among all her new friends, listened with them to his
words.
'Our deliverer Elsie,' he said, 'was brought hither by the good magic of our
Chief Mage and Prime Minister. She has removed the enchantment that held us; and
the dragon, now that he has had his tea and recovered from the shock of being
kindly treated, turns out to be the second strongest magician in the world,-and
he will help us and advise us, so long as we remember that we are all brothers
and fellow-workers. And now comes the time when our Elsie must return to her own
place, or another go in her stead. But we cannot send back our heroine, our
deliverer.' (Long, loud cheering.) 'So one shall take her place. My daughter--'
The end of the sentence was lost in shouts of admiration. But Elsie stood up,
small and[p204white in her black frock, and
said, 'No thank you. Perdona would simply hate it. And she doesn't know my
daddy. He'll fetch me away from Mrs. Staines some day….'
The thought of her daddy, far away in India, of the loneliness of Willow
Farm, where now it would be night in that horrible bare attic where the poor
dead untameable little mouse was, nearly choked Elsie. It was so bright and
light and good and kind here. And India was so far away. Her voice stayed a
moment on a broken note.
'I-I….' Then she spoke firmly.
'Thank you all so much,' she said-'so very much. I do love you all, and it's
lovely here. But, please, I'd like to go home now.'
The Prime Minister, in a silence full of love and understanding, folded his
dark cloak round her.
* * * * *
It was dark in the attic. Elsie crouching alone in the blackness by the
fireplace where the dead mouse had been, put out her hand to touch its cold
fur.
* * * * *
There were wheels on the gravel outside-the knocker swung
strongly-'Rat-tat-tat-tat-Tat!Tat!' A
pause-voices-hasty feet in strong boots sounded on the stairs, the key[p205turned in the lock. The door
opened a dazzling crack, then fully, to the glare of a lamp carried by Mrs.
Staines.
'Come down at once. I'm sure you're good now,' she said, in a great hurry and
in a new honeyed voice.
But there were other feet on the stairs-a step that Elsie knew. 'Where's my
girl?' the voice she knew cried cheerfully. But under the cheerfulness Elsie
heard something other and dearer. 'Where's my girl?'
After all, it takes less than a month to come from India to the house in
England where one's heart is.
Out of the bare attic and the darkness Elsie leapt into light,
into arms she knew. 'Oh, my daddy, my daddy!' she cried. 'How glad I am I came
back!'
[p206] IX THE RELATED MUFF
We had never seen our cousin Sidney till that
Christmas Eve, and we didn't want to see him then, and we didn't like him when
we did see him. He was just dumped down into the middle of us by mother, at a
time when it would have been unkind to her to say how little we wanted him.
We knew already that there wasn't to be any proper Christmas for us, because
Aunt Ellie-the one who always used to send the necklaces and carved things from
India, and remembered everybody's birthday-had come home ill. Very ill she was,
at a hotel in London, and mother had to go to her, and, of course, father was
away with his ship.
And then after we had said good-bye to mother, and told her how sorry we
were, we were left to ourselves, and told each other what a shame it was, and no
presents or anything. And then mother came suddenly back in a cab,[p207and we all shouted 'Hooray'
when we saw the cab stop, and her get out of it. And then we saw she was getting
something out of the cab, and our hearts leapt up like the man's in the piece of
school poetry when he beheld a rainbow in the sky-because we thought she had
remembered about the presents, and the thing she was getting out of the cab was
them.
Of course it was not-it was Sidney, very thin and yellow, and looking as
sullen as a pig.
We opened the front door. Mother didn't even come in. She just said, 'Here's
your Cousin Sidney. Be nice to him and give him a good time, there's darlings.
And don't forget he's your visitor, so be very extra nice to him.'
I have sometimes thought it was the fault of what mother said about the
visitor that made what did happen happen, but I am almost sure really that it
was the fault of us, though I did not see it at the time, and even now I'm sure
we didn't mean to be unkind. Quite the opposite. But the events of life are very
confusing, especially when you try to think what made you do them, and whether
you really meant to be naughty or not. Quite often it is not-but it turns out
just the same.
When the cab had carried mother away-Hilda said it was like a dragon carrying
away[p208a queen-we said, 'How do you do' to our Cousin Sidney, who
replied, 'Quite well, thank you.'
And then, curiously enough, no one could think of anything more to say.
Then Rupert-which is me-remembered that about being a visitor, and he
said:
'Won't you come into the drawing-room?'
He did when he had taken off his gloves and overcoat. There was a fire in the
drawing-room, because we had been going to have games there with mother, only
the telegram came about Aunt Ellie.
So we all sat on chairs in the drawing-room, and thought of nothing to say
harder than ever.
Hilda did say, 'How old are you?' but, of course, we knew the answer to that.
It was ten.
And Hugh said, 'Do you like England or India best?'
And our cousin replied, 'India ever so much, thank you.'
I never felt such a duffer. It was awful. With all the millions of
interesting things that there are to say at other times, and I couldn't think of
one. At last I said, 'Do you like games?'
[opp
p208]
 So we all sat on chairs in the drawing-room, and
thought of nothing to say harder than ever.
And our cousin replied, 'Some games I do,'in a tone that made me sure that
the games he[p209liked wouldn't be our kind, but
some wild Indian sort that we didn't know.
I could see that the others were feeling just like me, and I knew we could
not go on like this till tea-time. And yet I didn't see any other way to go on
in. It was Hilda who cut the Gorgeous knot at last. She said:
'Hugh, let you and I go and make a lovely surprise for Rupert and
Sidney.'
And before I could think of any way of stopping them without being downright
rude to our new cousin, they had fled the scene, just like any old conspirators.
Rupert-me, I mean-was left alone with the stranger. I said:
'Is there anything you'd like to do?'
And he said, 'No, thank you.'
Then neither of us said anything for a bit-and I could hear the others
shrieking with laughter in the hall.
I said, 'I wonder what the surprise will be like.'
He said, 'Yes, I wonder'; but I could tell from his tone that he did not
wonder a bit.
The others were yelling with laughter. Have you ever noticed how very amused
people always are when you're not there? If you're in bed-ill, or in disgrace,
or anything-it always sounds like far finer jokes than ever occur when you are
not out of things.
[p210] 'Do you like reading?' said I-who am Rupert-in the tones
of despair.
'Yes,' said the cousin.
'Then take a book,' I said hastily, for I really could not stand it another
second, 'and you just read till the surprise is ready. I think I ought to go and
help the others. I'm the eldest, you know.'
I did not wait-I suppose if you're ten you can choose a book for yourself-and
I went.
Hilda's idea was just Indians, but I thought a wigwam would be nice. So we
made one with the hall table and the fur rugs off the floor. If everything had
been different, and Aunt Ellie hadn't been ill, we were to have had turkey for
dinner. The turkey's feathers were splendid for Indians, and the striped
blankets off Hugh's and my beds, and all mother's beads. The hall is big like a
room, and there was a fire. The afternoon passed like a beautiful dream. When
Rupert had done his own feathering and blanketing, as well as brown paper
moccasins, he helped the others. The tea-bell rang before we were quite dressed.
We got Louisa to go up and tell our cousin that the surprise was ready, and we
all got inside the wigwam. It was a very tight fit, with the feathers and the
blankets.
He came down the stairs very slowly, reading[p211all the time, and when he got
to the mat at the bottom of the stairs we burst forth in all our war-paint from
the wigwam. It upset, because Hugh and Hilda stuck between the table's legs, and
it fell on the stone floor with quite a loud noise. The wild Indians picked
themselves up out of the ruins and did the finest war-dance I've ever seen in
front of my cousin Sidney.
He gave one little scream, and then sat down suddenly on the bottom steps. He
leaned his head against the banisters and we thought he was admiring the
war-dance, till Eliza, who had been laughing and making as much noise as any
one, suddenly went up to him and shook him.
'Stop that noise,' she said to us, 'he's gone off into a dead faint.'
He had.
Of course we were very sorry and all that, but we never thought he'd be such
a muff as to be frightened of three Red Indians and a wigwam that happened to
upset. He was put to bed, and we had our teas.
'I wish we hadn't,' Hilda said.
'So do I,' said Hugh.
But Rupert said, 'No one could have expected a cousin of ours to be
a chicken-hearted duffer. He's a muff. It's bad enough[p212to
have a muff in the house at all, and at Christmas time, too. But a related
muff!'
Still the affair had cast a gloom, and we were glad when it was bed-time.
Next day was Christmas Day, and no presents, and nobody but the servants to
wish a Merry Christmas to.
Our cousin Sidney came down to breakfast, and as it was Christmas Day Rupert
bent his proud spirit to own he was sorry about the Indians.
Sidney said, 'It doesn't matter. I'm sorry too. Only I didn't expect it.'
We suggested two or three games, such as Parlour Cricket, National Gallery,
and Grab-but Sidney said he would rather read. So we said would he mind if we
played out the Indian game which we had dropped, out of politeness, when he
fainted.
He said:
'I don't mind at all, now I know what it is you're up to. No, thank you, I'd
rather read,'he added, in reply to Rupert's unselfish offer to dress him for the
part of Sitting Bull.
So he read Treasure Island, and we fought on the stairs with no
casualties except the gas globes, and then we scalped all the dolls-putting on
paper scalps first because Hilda wished it-and we scalped Eliza as she passed[p213through the hall-hers was a
white scalp with lacey stuff on it and long streamers.
[opp
p213]
 'We scalped Eliza as she passed through the
hall.'
And when it was beginning to get dark we thought of flying machines. Of
course Sidney wouldn't play at that either, and Hilda and Hugh were contented
with paper wings-there were some rolls of rather decent yellow and pink crinkled
paper that mother had bought to make lamp shades of. They made wings of this,
and then they played at fairies up and down the stairs, while Sidney sat at the
bottom of the stairs and went on reading Treasure Island. But
Rupert was determined to have a flying machine, with real flipper-flappery
wings, like at Hendon. So he got two brass fire-guards out of the spare room and
mother's bedroom, and covered them with newspapers fastened on with string. Then
he got a tea-tray and fastened it on to himself with rug-straps, and then he
slipped his arms in between the string and the fire-guards, and went to the top
of the stairs and shouting, 'Look out below there! Beware Flying Machines!' he
sat down suddenly on the tray, and tobogganed gloriously down the stairs,
flapping his fire-guard wings. It was a great success, and felt more like flying
than anything he ever played at. But Hilda had not had time to look out
thoroughly, because he did not wait any time between his[p214warning and his descent. So that she was still fluttering, in
the character of Queen of the Butterfly Fairies, about half-way down the stairs
when the flying machine, composed of the two guards, the tea-tray, and Rupert,
started from the top of them, and she could only get out of the way by standing
back close against the wall. Unluckily the place where she was, was also the
place where the gas was burning in a little recess. You remember we had broken
the globe when we were playing Indians.
Now, of course, you know what happened, because you have read Harriett
and the Matches, and all the rest of the stories that have been written
to persuade children not to play with fire. No one was playing with fire that
day, it is true, or doing anything really naughty at all-but however naughty we
had been the thing that happened couldn't have been much worse. For the flying
machine as it came rushing round the curve of the staircase banged against the
legs of Hilda. She screamed and stumbled back. Her pink paper wings went into
the gas that hadn't a globe. They flamed up, her hair frizzled, and her lace
collar caught fire. Rupert could not do anything because he was held fast in his
flying machine, and he and it were rolling painfully on the mat at the bottom of
the stairs.
[opp
p215]
 Sidney threw the rug over her, and rolled her over
and over.
[p215] Hilda screamed.
I have since heard that a great yellow light fell on the pages of
Treasure Island.
Next moment Treasure Island went spinning across the room.
Sidney caught up the fur rug that was part of the wigwam, and as Hilda,
screaming horribly, and with wings not of paper but of flames, rushed down the
staircase, and stumbled over the flying machine, Sidney threw the rug over her,
and rolled her over and over on the floor.
'Lie down!' he cried. 'Lie down! It's the only way.'
But somehow people never will lie down when their clothes are on fire, any
more than they will lie still in the water if they think they are drowning, and
some one is trying to save them. It came to something very like a fight. Hilda
fought and struggled. Rupert got out of his fire-guards and added himself and
his tea-tray to the scrimmage. Hugh slid down to the knob of the banisters and
sat there yelling. The servants came rushing in.
But by that time the fire was out. And Sidney gasped out, 'It's all right.
You aren't burned, Hilda, are you?'
Hilda was much too frightened to know whether she was burnt or not, but Eliza
looked her over, and it turned out that only[p216her neck was a little scorched,
and a good deal of her hair frizzled off short.
Every one stood, rather breathless and pale, and every one's face was much
dirtier than customary, except Hugh's, which he had, as usual, dirtied
thoroughly quite early in the afternoon. Rupert felt perfectly awful, ashamed
and proud and rather sick. 'You're a regular hero, Sidney,' he said-and it was
not easy to say-'and yesterday I said you were a related muff. And I'm jolly
sorry I did. Shake hands, won't you?'
Sidney hesitated.
'Too proud?' Rupert's feelings were hurt, and I should not wonder if he spoke
rather fiercely.
'It's-it's a little burnt, I think,' said Sidney,'don't be angry,' and he
held out the left hand.
Rupert grasped it.
'I do beg your pardon,' he said, 'you are a hero!'
* * * * *
Sidney's hand was bad for ever so long, but we were tremendous chums after
that.
It was when they'd done the hand up with scraped potato and salad oil-a
great, big, fat, wet plaster of it-that I said to him:
'I don't care if you don't like games. Let's
be pals.'
[p217] And he said, 'I do like games, but I couldn't care about
anything with mother so ill. I know you'll think I'm a muff, but I'm not really,
only I do love her so.'
And with that he began to cry, and I thumped him on the back, and told him
exactly what a beast I knew I was, to comfort him.
When Aunt Ellie was well again we kept Christmas on the 6th of January, which
used to be Christmas Day in middle-aged times.
Father came home before New Year, and he had a silver medal made, with a
flame on one side, and on the other Sidney's name, and'For Bravery.'
If I had not been tied up in fire-guards and tea-trays perhaps
I should have thought of the rug and got the medal. But I do not grudge it to
Sidney. He deserved it. And he is not a muff. I see now that a person might very
well be frightened at finding Indians in the hall of a strange house,
especially if the person had just come from the kind of India where the Indians
are quite a different sort, and much milder, with no feathers and wigwams and
war-dances, but only dusky features and University Degrees.
[p218] X THE AUNT AND AMABEL
It is not pleasant to be a fish out of water. To
be a cat in water is not what any one would desire. To be in a temper is
uncomfortable. And no one can fully taste the joys of life if he is in a Little
Lord Fauntleroy suit. But by far the most uncomfortable thing to be in is
disgrace, sometimes amusingly called Coventry by the people who are not in
it.
We have all been there. It is a place where the heart sinks and aches, where
familiar faces are clouded and changed, where any remark that one may
tremblingly make is received with stony silence or with the assurance that
nobody wants to talk to such a naughty child. If you are only in disgrace, and
not in solitary confinement, you will creep about a house that is like the one
you have had such jolly times in, and yet as unlike it as a bad dream is to a
June morning. You will long to speak to people, and be afraid to speak. You will
wonder[p219whether there is anything you can do that will change things
at all. You have said you are sorry, and that has changed nothing. You will
wonder whether you are to stay for ever in this desolate place, outside all
hope and love and fun and happiness. And though it has happened before, and has
always, in the end, come to an end, you can never be quite sure that this time
it is not going to last for ever.
'It is going to last for ever,' said Amabel, who was eight. 'What
shall I do? Oh whatever shall I do?'
What she had done ought to have formed the subject of her
meditations. And she had done what had seemed to her all the time, and in fact
still seemed, a self-sacrificing and noble act. She was staying with an
aunt-measles or a new baby, or the painters in the house, I forget which, the
cause of her banishment. And the aunt, who was really a great-aunt and quite old
enough to know better, had been grumbling about her head gardener to a lady who
called in blue spectacles and a beady bonnet with violet flowers in it.
'He hardly lets me have a plant for the table,'said the aunt, 'and that
border in front of the breakfast-room window-it's just bare earth-and I
expressly ordered chrysanthemums to be[p220planted there. He thinks of nothing but his greenhouse.'
The beady-violet-blue-glassed lady snorted, and said she didn't know what we
were coming to, and she would have just half a cup, please, with not quite so
much milk, thank you very much.
Now what would you have done? Minded your own business most likely, and not
got into trouble at all. Not so Amabel. Enthusiastically anxious to do something
which should make the great-aunt see what a thoughtful, unselfish, little girl
she really was (the aunt's opinion of her being at present quite otherwise), she
got up very early in the morning and took the cutting-out scissors from the
work-room table drawer and stole, 'like an errand of mercy,' she told herself,
to the greenhouse where she busily snipped off every single flower she could
find. MacFarlane was at his breakfast. Then with the points of the cutting-out
scissors she made nice deep little holes in the flower-bed where the
chrysanthemums ought to have been, and struck the flowers in-chrysanthemums,
geraniums, primulas, orchids, and carnations. It would be a lovely surprise for
Auntie.
Then the aunt came down to breakfast and saw the lovely surprise. Amabel's
world turned upside down and inside out suddenly and surprisingly, and there she
was, in Coventry,[p221and
not even the housemaid would speak to her. Her great-uncle, whom she passed in
the hall on her way to her own room, did indeed, as he smoothed his hat, murmur,
'Sent to Coventry, eh? Never mind, it'll soon be over,' and went off to the City
banging the front door behind him.
He meant well, but he did not understand.
Amabel understood, or she thought she did, and knew in her miserable heart
that she was sent to Coventry for the last time, and that this time she would
stay there.
'I don't care,' she said quite untruly. 'I'll never try to be kind to any one
again.' And that wasn't true either. She was to spend the whole day alone in the
best bedroom, the one with the four-post bed and the red curtains and the large
wardrobe with a looking-glass in it that you could see yourself in to the very
ends of your strap-shoes.
The first thing Amabel did was to look at herself in the glass. She was still
sniffing and sobbing, and her eyes were swimming in tears, another one rolled
down her nose as she looked-that was very interesting. Another rolled down, and
that was the last, because as soon as you get interested in watching your tears
they stop.
Next she looked out of the window, and saw[p222the decorated flower-bed, just
as she had left it, very bright and beautiful.
'Well, it does look nice,' she said. 'I don't care what they
say.'
Then she looked round the room for something to read; there was nothing. The
old-fashioned best bedrooms never did have anything. Only on the large
dressing-table, on the left-hand side of the oval swing-glass, was one book
covered in red velvet, and on it, very twistily embroidered in yellow silk and
mixed up with misleading leaves and squiggles were the letters, A.B.C.
'Perhaps it's a picture alphabet,' said Mabel, and was quite pleased, though
of course she was much too old to care for alphabets. Only when one is very
unhappy and very dull, anything is better than nothing. She opened the book.
'Why, it's only a time-table!' she said. 'I suppose it's for people when they
want to go away, and Auntie puts it here in case they suddenly make up their
minds to go, and feel that they can't wait another minute. I feel like that,
only it's no good, and I expect other people do too.'
She had learned how to use the dictionary, and this seemed to go the same
way. She looked up the names of all the places she knew.-Brighton[p223where she had once spent a
month, Rugby where her brother was at school, and Home, which was Amberley-and
she saw the times when the trains left for these places, and wished she could go
by those trains.
And once more she looked round the best bedroom which was her prison, and
thought of the Bastille, and wished she had a toad to tame, like the poor
Viscount, or a flower to watch growing, like Picciola, and she was very sorry
for herself, and very angry with her aunt, and very grieved at the conduct of
her parents-she had expected better things from them-and now they had left her
in this dreadful place where no one loved her, and no one understood her.
There seemed to be no place for toads or flowers in the best room, it was
carpeted all over even in its least noticeable corners. It had everything a best
room ought to have-and everything was of dark shining mahogany. The toilet-table
had a set of red and gold glass things-a tray, candlesticks, a ring-stand, many
little pots with lids, and two bottles with stoppers. When the stoppers were
taken out they smelt very strange, something like very old scent, and something
like cold cream also very old, and something like going to the dentist's.
I do not know whether the scent of those[p224bottles had anything to do with
what happened. It certainly was a very extraordinary scent. Quite different from
any perfume that I smell nowadays, but I remember that when I was a little girl
I smelt it quite often. But then there are no best rooms now such as there used
to be. The best rooms now are gay with chintz and mirrors, and there are always
flowers and books, and little tables to put your teacup on, and sofas, and
armchairs. And they smell of varnish and new furniture.
When Amabel had sniffed at both bottles and looked in all the pots, which
were quite clean and empty except for a pearl button and two pins in one of
them, she took up the A.B.C. again to look for Whitby, where her godmother
lived. And it was then that she saw the extraordinary name
'Whereyouwantogoto.'This was odd-but the name of the station from which
it started was still more extraordinary, for it was not Euston or Cannon Street
or Marylebone.
The name of the station was 'Bigwardrobeinspareroom.'And below this
name, really quite unusual for a station, Amabel read in small letters:
'Single fares strictly forbidden. Return tickets No Class Nuppence. Trains
leaveBigwardrobeinspareroom all the time.'
[p225] And under that in still smaller letters-
'You had better go now.'
What would you have done? Rubbed your eyes and thought you were dreaming?
Well, if you had, nothing more would have happened. Nothing ever does when you
behave like that. Amabel was wiser. She went straight to the Big Wardrobe and
turned its glass handle.
'I expect it's only shelves and people's best hats,' she said. But she only
said it. People often say what they don't mean, so that if things turn out as
they don't expect, they can say 'I told you so,' but this is most dishonest to
one's self, and being dishonest to one's self is almost worse than being
dishonest to other people. Amabel would never have done it if she had been
herself. But she was out of herself with anger and unhappiness.
Of course it wasn't hats. It was, most amazingly, a crystal cave, very oddly
shaped like a railway station. It seemed to be lighted by stars, which is, of
course, unusual in a booking office, and over the station clock was a full moon.
The clock had no figures, only Nowin shining letters all round it, twelve
times, and the Nows touched, so the clock was bound to be always right.
How different from the clock you go to school by!
[p226] A porter in white satin hurried forward to take Amabel's
luggage. Her luggage was the A.B.C. which she still held in her hand.
'Lots of time, Miss,' he said, grinning in a most friendly way, 'I
am glad you're going. You will enjoy yourself! What a nice
little girl you are!'
This was cheering. Amabel smiled.
At the pigeon-hole that tickets come out of, another person, also in white
satin, was ready with a mother-of-pearl ticket, round, like a card counter.
'Here you are, Miss,' he said with the kindest smile, 'price nothing, and
refreshments free all the way. It's a pleasure,' he added, 'to issue a ticket to
a nice little lady like you.'The train was entirely of crystal, too, and the
cushions were of white satin. There were little buttons such as you have for
electric bells, and on them 'Whatyouwantoeat,'
'Whatyouwantodrink,' 'Whatyouwantoread,' in silver letters.
Amabel pressed all the buttons at once, and instantly felt obliged to blink.
The blink over, she saw on the cushion by her side a silver tray with vanilla
ice, boiled chicken and white sauce, almonds (blanched), peppermint creams, and
mashed potatoes, and a long glass of lemonade-beside the tray was a book. It was
[p227Mrs. Ewing's Bad-tempered Family, and it was
bound in white vellum.
There is nothing more luxurious than eating while you read-unless it be
reading while you eat. Amabel did both: they are not the same thing, as you will
see if you think the matter over.
And just as the last thrill of the last spoonful of ice died away, and the
last full stop of theBad-tempered Family met Amabel's eye, the
train stopped, and hundreds of railway officials in white velvet shouted,
'Whereyouwantogoto!Get out!'
A velvety porter, who was somehow like a silkworm as well as like a wedding
handkerchief sachet, opened the door.
'Now!' he said, 'come on out, Miss Amabel, unless you want to go to
Whereyoudon'twantogoto.'
She hurried out, on to an ivory platform.
'Not on the ivory, if you please,' said the porter, 'the white Axminster
carpet-it's laid down expressly for you.'
Amabel walked along it and saw ahead of her a crowd, all in white.
'What's all that?' she asked the friendly porter.
'It's the Mayor, dear Miss Amabel,' he said,
'with your address.'
[p228] 'My address is The Old Cottage, Amberley,'she said, 'at
least it used to be'-and found herself face to face with the Mayor. He was very
like Uncle George, but he bowed low to her, which was not Uncle George's habit,
and said:
'Welcome, dear little Amabel. Please accept this admiring address from the
Mayor and burgesses and apprentices and all the rest of it, of
Whereyouwantogoto.'
The address was in silver letters, on white silk, and it said:
'Welcome, dear Amabel. We know you meant to please your aunt. It was very
clever of you to think of putting the greenhouse flowers in the bare flower-bed.
You couldn't be expected to know that you ought to ask leave before you touch
other people's things.'
'Oh, but,' said Amabel quite confused. 'I did….'
But the band struck up, and drowned her words. The instruments of the band
were all of silver, and the bandsmen's clothes of white leather. The tune they
played was'Cheero!'
Then Amabel found that she was taking part in a procession, hand in hand with
the Mayor, and the band playing like mad all the time. The Mayor was dressed
entirely in cloth[p229of
silver, and as they went along he kept saying, close to her ear.
'You have our sympathy, you have our sympathy,' till she felt quite
giddy.
There was a flower show-all the flowers were white. There was a concert-all
the tunes were old ones. There was a play calledPut yourself in her
place. And there was a banquet, with Amabel in the place of honour.
They drank her health in white wine whey, and then through the Crystal Hall
of a thousand gleaming pillars, where thousands of guests, all in white, were
met to do honour to Amabel, the shout went up-'Speech, speech!'
I cannot explain to you what had been going on in Amabel's mind. Perhaps you
know. Whatever it was it began like a very tiny butterfly in a box, that could
not keep quiet, but fluttered, and fluttered, and fluttered. And when the Mayor
rose and said:
'Dear Amabel, you whom we all love and understand; dear Amabel, you who were
so unjustly punished for trying to give pleasure to an unresponsive aunt; poor,
ill-used, ill-treated, innocent Amabel; blameless, suffering Amabel, we await
your words,' that fluttering, tiresome butterfly-thing inside her seemed
suddenly to swell to the size and strength of a fluttering albatross, and Amabel
got up from her seat of[p230honour on the throne of ivory and silver and pearl, and said,
choking a little, and extremely red about the ears-
'Ladies and gentlemen, I don't want to make a speech, I just want to say,
“Thank you,” and to say-to say-to say….'
She stopped, and all the white crowd cheered.
'To say,' she went on as the cheers died down, 'that I wasn't blameless, and
innocent, and all those nice things. I ought to have thought. And they
were Auntie's flowers. But I did want to please her. It's all so mixed.
Oh, I wish Auntie was here!'
And instantly Auntie was there, very tall and quite nice-looking, in
a white velvet dress and an ermine cloak.
'Speech,' cried the crowd. 'Speech from Auntie!'
Auntie stood on the step of the throne beside Amabel, and said:
'I think, perhaps, I was hasty. And I think Amabel meant to please me. But
all the flowers that were meant for the winter …well-I was annoyed. I'm
sorry.'
'Oh, Auntie, so am I-so am I,' cried Amabel, and the two began to hug each
other on the ivory step, while the crowd cheered like mad, and the band struck
up that well-known air, 'If you only understood!'
[p231] 'Oh, Auntie,' said Amabel among hugs,'This is such a
lovely place, come and see everything, we may, mayn't we?' she asked the
Mayor.
'The place is yours,' he said, 'and now you can see many things that you
couldn't see before. We are The People who Understand. And now you are one of
Us. And your aunt is another.'
I must not tell you all that they saw because these things are secrets only
known to The People who Understand, and perhaps you do not yet belong to that
happy nation. And if you do, you will know without my telling you.
And when it grew late, and the stars were drawn down, somehow, to hang among
the trees, Amabel fell asleep in her aunt's arms beside a white foaming
fountain on a marble terrace, where white peacocks came to drink.
* * * * *
She awoke on the big bed in the spare room, but her aunt's arms were still
round her.
'Amabel,' she was saying, 'Amabel!'
'Oh, Auntie,' said Amabel sleepily, 'I am so sorry. It was stupid of
me. And I did mean to please you.'
'It was stupid of you,' said the aunt, 'but I am sure you meant to
please me. Come down[p232to
supper.' And Amabel has a confused recollection of her aunt's saying that she
was sorry, adding, 'Poor little Amabel.'
If the aunt really did say it, it was fine of her. And Amabel is quite sure
that she did say it.
* * * * *
Amabel and her great-aunt are now the best of friends. But neither of them
has ever spoken to the other of the beautiful city called
'Whereyouwantogoto.' Amabel is too shy to be the first to mention it, and
no doubt the aunt has her own reasons for not broaching the subject.
But of course they both know that they have been there together, and it is
easy to get on with people when you and they alike belong to the
Peoplewhounderstand.
* * * * *
If you look in the A.B.C. that your people have you will not
find 'Whereyouwantogoto.'It is only in the red velvet bound copy that
Amabel found in her aunt's best bedroom.
[p233] XI KENNETH AND THE CARP
Kenneth's cousins had often stayed with him, but
he had never till now stayed with them. And you know how different everything is
when you are in your own house. You are certain exactly what games the grown-ups
dislike and what games they will not notice; also what sort of mischief is
looked over and what sort is not. And, being accustomed to your own sort of
grown-ups, you can always be pretty sure when you are likely to catch it.
Whereas strange houses are, in this matter of catching it, full of the most
unpleasing surprises.
You know all this. But Kenneth did not. And still less did he know what were
the sort of things which, in his cousins' house, led to disapproval, punishment,
scoldings; in short, to catching it. So that that business of cousin Ethel's
jewel-case, which is where this story ought to begin, was really not Kenneth's
fault[p234at all. Though for a time…. But I am getting on too fast.
Kenneth's cousins were four,-Conrad, Alison, George, and Ethel. The three
first were natural sort of cousins somewhere near his own age, but Ethel was
hardly like a cousin at all, more like an aunt. Because she was grown-up. She
wore long dresses and all her hair on the top of her head, a mass of combs and
hairpins; in fact she had just had her twenty-first birthday with iced cakes and
a party and lots of presents, most of them jewelry. And that brings me again to
that affair of the jewel-case, or would bring me if I were not determined to
tell things in their proper order, which is the first duty of a
story-teller.
Kenneth's home was in Kent, a wooden house among cherry orchards, and the
nearest river five miles away. That was why he looked forward in such a very
extra and excited way to his visit to his cousins. Their house was very old, red
brick with ivy all over it. It had a secret staircase, only the secret was not
kept any longer, and the housemaids carried pails and brooms up and down the
staircase. And the house was surrounded by a real deep moat, with clear water in
it, and long weeds and water-lilies and fish-the gold and the silver and the
everyday kinds.
[opp
p235]
 Early next morning he tried to catch fish with
several pieces of string knotted together and a hairpin.
[p235] The first evening of Kenneth's visit passed uneventfully.
His bedroom window looked over the moat, and early next morning he tried to
catch fish with several pieces of string knotted together and a hairpin kindly
lent to him by the parlourmaid. He did not catch any fish, partly because he
baited the hairpin with brown windsor soap, and it washed off.
'Besides, fish hate soap,' Conrad told him,'and that hook of yours would do
for a whale perhaps. Only we don't stock our moat with whales. But I'll ask
father to lend you his rod, it's a spiffing one, much jollier than ours. And I
won't tell the kids because they'd never let it down on you. Fishing with a
hairpin!'
'Thank you very much,' said Kenneth,
feeling that his cousin was a man and a brother. The kids were only two or three
years younger than he was, but that is a great deal when you are the elder; and
besides, one of the kids was a girl.
'Alison's a bit of a sneak,' Conrad used to say when anger overcome
politeness and brotherly feeling. Afterwards, when the anger was gone and the
other things left, he would say, 'You see she went to a beastly school for a
bit, at Brighton, for her health. And father says they must have bullied her.
All girls are not like it, I believe.'
[p236] But her sneakish qualities, if they really existed, were
generally hidden, and she was very clever at thinking of new games, and very
kind if you got into a row over anything.
George was eight and stout. He was not a sneak, but concealment was foreign
to his nature, so he never could keep a secret unless he forgot it. Which
fortunately happened quite often.
The uncle very amiably lent Kenneth his fishing-rod, and provided real bait
in the most thoughtful and generous manner. And the four children fished all the
morning and all the afternoon. Conrad caught two roach and an eel. George caught
nothing, and nothing was what the other two caught. But it was glorious sport.
And the next day there was to be a picnic. Life to Kenneth seemed full of new
and delicious excitement.
In the evening the aunt and the uncle went out to dinner, and Ethel, in her
grown-up way, went with them, very grand in a blue silk dress and turquoises. So
the children were left to themselves.
You know the empty hush which settles down on a house when the grown-ups have
gone out to dinner and you have the whole evening to do what you like in. The
children stood in the hall a moment after the carriage[p237wheels had died away with the scrunching swish that the
carriage wheels always made as they turned the corner by the lodge, where the
gravel was extra thick and soft owing to the droppings from the trees. From the
kitchen came the voices of the servants, laughing and talking.
'It's two hours at least to bedtime,' said Alison. 'What shall we do?' Alison
always began by saying 'What shall we do?' and always ended by deciding what
should be done.'You all say what you think,' she went on,'and then we'll vote
about it. You first, Ken, because you're the visitor.'
'Fishing,' said Kenneth, because it was the only thing he could think of.
'Make toffee,' said Conrad.
'Build a great big house with all the bricks,'said George.
'We can't make toffee,' Alison explained gently but firmly, 'because you know
what the pan was like last time, and cook said, “never again, not much.” And
it's no good building houses, Georgie, when you could be out of doors. And
fishing's simply rotten when we've been at it all day. I've thought of
something.'
So of course all the others said, 'What?'
'We'll have a pageant, a river pageant, on[p238the moat. We'll all dress up
and hang Chinese lanterns in the trees. I'll be the Sunflower lady that the
Troubadour came all across the sea, because he loved her so, for, and one of you
can be the Troubadour, and the others can be sailors or anything you like.'
'I shall be the Troubadour,' said Conrad with decision.
'I think you ought to let Kenneth because he's the visitor,' said George, who
would have liked to be it immensely himself, or anyhow did not see why Conrad
should be a troubadour if he couldn't.
Conrad said what manners required, which was:
'Oh! all right, I don't care about being the beastly Troubadour.'
'You might be the Princess's brother,'Alison suggested.
'Not me,' said Conrad scornfully, 'I'll be the captain of the ship.'
'In a turban the brother would be, with the Benares cloak, and the Persian
dagger out of the cabinet in the drawing-room,' Alison went on unmoved.
'I'll be that,' said George.
'No, you won't, I shall, so there,' said Conrad. 'You can be the captain of
the ship.'
(But in the end both boys were captains,[p239because that meant being on the
boat, whereas being the Princess's brother, however turbanned, only meant
standing on the bank. And there is no rule to prevent captains wearing turbans
and Persian daggers, except in the Navy where, of course, it is not done.)
So then they all tore up to the attic where the dressing-up trunk was, and
pulled out all the dressing-up things on to the floor. And all the time they
were dressing, Alison was telling the others what they were to say and do. The
Princess wore a white satin skirt and a red flannel blouse and a veil formed of
several motor scarves of various colours. Also a wreath of pink roses off one of
Ethel's old hats, and a pair of pink satin slippers with sparkly buckles.
Kenneth wore a blue silk dressing-jacket and a yellow sash, a lace collar,
and a towel turban. And the others divided between them an eastern
dressing-gown, once the property of their grandfather, a black spangled scarf,
very holey, a pair of red and white football stockings, a Chinese coat, and two
old muslin curtains, which, rolled up, made turbans of enormous size and
fierceness.
On the landing outside cousin Ethel's open door Alison paused and said, 'I
say!'
'Oh! come on,' said Conrad, 'we haven't[p240fixed the Chinese lanterns yet,
and it's getting dark.'
'You go on,' said Alison, 'I've just thought of something.'
The children were allowed to play in the boat so long as they didn't loose it
from its moorings. The painter was extremely long, and quite the effect of
coming home from a long voyage was produced when the three boys pushed the boat
out as far as it would go among the boughs of the beech-tree which overhung the
water, and then reappeared in the circle of red and yellow light thrown by the
Chinese lanterns.
'What ho! ashore there!' shouted the captain.
'What ho!' said a voice from the shore which, Alison explained, was
disguised.
'We be three poor mariners,' said Conrad by a happy effort of memory, 'just
newly come to shore. We seek news of the Princess of Tripoli.'
'She's in her palace,' said the disguised voice, 'wait a minute, and I'll
tell her you're here. But what do you want her for? (“A poor minstrel of
France”) go on, Con.'
'A poor minstrel of France,' said Conrad,'(all right! I remember,) who has
heard of the Princess's beauty has come to lay, to lay--'
'His heart,' said Alison.
[opp
p241]
 A radiant vision stepped into the circle of
light.
[p241] 'All right, I know. His heart at her something or other
feet.'
'Pretty feet,' said Alison. 'I go to tell the Princess.'
Next moment from the shadows on the bank a radiant vision stepped into the
circle of light, crying-
'Oh! Rudel, is it indeed thou? Thou art come at last. O welcome to the arms
of the Princess!'
'What do I do now?' whispered Rudel (who was Kenneth) in the boat, and at the
same moment Conrad and George said, as with one voice-
'My hat! Alison, won't you catch it!'
For at the end of the Princess's speech she had thrown back her veils and
revealed a blaze of splendour. She wore several necklaces, one of seed pearls,
one of topazes, and one of Australian shells, besides a string of amber and one
of coral. And the front of the red flannel blouse was studded with brooches, in
one at least of which diamonds gleamed. Each arm had one or two bracelets and
on her clenched hands glittered as many rings as any Princess could wish to
wear.
So her brothers had some excuse for saying,'You'll catch it.'
'No, I sha'n't. It's my look out, anyhow.[p242Do shut up,' said the Princess,
stamping her foot. 'Now then, Ken, go ahead. Ken, you say, “Oh Lady, I faint
with rapture!”'
'I faint with rapture,' said Kenneth stolidly.'Now I land, don't I?'
He landed and stared at the jewelled hand the Princess held out.
'At last, at last,' she said, 'but you ought to say that, Ken. I say, I think
I'd better be an eloping Princess, and then I can come in the boat. Rudel dies
really, but that's so dull. Lead me to your ship, oh noble stranger! for you
have won the Princess, and with you I will live and die. Give me your hand,
can't you, silly, and do mind my train.'
So Kenneth led her to the boat, and with some difficulty, for the satin train
got between her feet, she managed to flounder into the punt.
'Now you stand and bow,' she said. 'Fair Rudel, with this ring I thee wed,'
she pressed a large amethyst ring into his hand, 'remember that the Princess of
Tripoli is yours for ever. Now let's sing Integer Vitae because
it's Latin.'
So they sat in the boat and sang. And presently the servants came out to
listen and admire, and at the sound of the servants'approach the Princess veiled
her shining splendour.
'It's prettier than wot the Coventry pageant[p243was, so it is,' said the cook,
'but it's long past your bed times. So come on out of that there dangerous boat,
there's dears.'
So then the children went to bed. And when the house was quiet again, Alison
slipped down and put back Ethel's jewelry, fitting the things into their cases
and boxes as correctly as she could. 'Ethel won't notice,' she thought, but of
course Ethel did.
So that next day each child was asked separately by Ethel's mother who had
been playing with Ethel's jewelry. And Conrad and George said they would rather
not say. This was a form they always used in that family when that sort of
question was asked, and it meant, 'It wasn't me, and I don't want to sneak.'
And when it came to Alison's turn, she found to her surprise and horror that
instead of saying,'I played with them,' she had said, 'I would rather not
say.'
Of course the mother thought that it was Kenneth who had had the jewels to
play with. So when it came to his turn he was not asked the same question as the
others, but his aunt said:
'Kenneth, you are a very naughty little boy to take your cousin Ethel's
jewelry to play with.'
'I didn't,' said Kenneth.
[p244] 'Hush! hush!' said the aunt, 'do not make your fault
worse by untruthfulness. And what have you done with the amethyst ring?'
Kenneth was just going to say that he had given it back to Alison, when he
saw that this would be sneakish. So he said, getting hot to the ears, 'You don't
suppose I've stolen your beastly ring, do you, Auntie?'
'Don't you dare to speak to me like that,'the aunt very naturally replied.
'No, Kenneth, I do not think you would steal, but the ring is missing and it
must be found.'
Kenneth was furious and frightened. He stood looking down and kicking the leg
of the chair.
'You had better look for it. You will have plenty of time, because I shall
not allow you to go to the picnic with the others. The mere taking of the
jewelry was wrong, but if you had owned your fault and asked Ethel's pardon, I
should have overlooked it. But you have told me an untruth and you have lost
the ring. You are a very wicked child, and it will make your dear mother very
unhappy when she hears of it. That her boy should be a liar. It is worse than
being a thief!'
At this Kenneth's fortitude gave way, and he lost his head. 'Oh, don't,' he
said, 'I didn't. I didn't. I didn't. Oh! don't tell mother I'm[p245a thief and a liar. Oh! Aunt
Effie, please,please don't.' And with that he began to cry.
Any doubts Aunt Effie might have had were settled by this outbreak. It was
now quite plain to her that Kenneth had really intended to keep the ring.
'You will remain in your room till the picnic party has started,' the aunt
went on, 'and then you must find the ring. Remember I expect it to be found when
I return. And I hope you will be in a better frame of mind and really sorry for
having been so wicked.'
'Mayn't I see Alison?' was all he found to say.
And the answer was, 'Certainly not. I cannot allow you to associate with your
cousins. You are not fit to be with honest, truthful children.'
So they all went to the picnic, and Kenneth was left alone. When they had
gone he crept down and wandered furtively through the empty rooms, ashamed to
face the servants, and feeling almost as wicked as though he had really done
something wrong. He thought about it all, over and over again, and the more he
thought the more certain he was that hehad handed back the ring to
Alison last night when the voices of the servants were first heard from the dark
lawn.
[p246] But what was the use of saying so? No one would believe
him, and it would be sneaking anyhow. Besides, perhaps he hadn'thanded
it back to her. Or rather, perhaps he had handed it and she hadn't taken it.
Perhaps it had slipped into the boat. He would go and see.
But he did not find it in the boat, though he turned up the carpet and even
took up the boards to look. And then an extremely miserable little boy began to
search for an amethyst ring in all sorts of impossible places, indoors and out.
You know the hopeless way in which you look for things that you know perfectly
well you will never find, the borrowed penknife that you dropped in the woods,
for instance, or the week's pocket-money which slipped through that hole in your
pocket as you went to the village to spend it.
The servants gave him his meals and told him to cheer up. But cheering up and
Kenneth were, for the time, strangers. People in books never can eat when they
are in trouble, but I have noticed myself that if the trouble has gone on for
some hours, eating is really rather a comfort. You don't enjoy eating so much as
usual, perhaps, but at any rate it is something to do, and takes the edge off
your sorrow for a short time. And cook was sorry for Kenneth[p247and sent him up a very nice
dinner and a very nice tea. Roast chicken and gooseberry pie the dinner was, and
for tea there was cake with almond icing on it.
The sun was very low when he went back wearily to have one more look in the
boat for that detestable amethyst ring. Of course it was not there. And the
picnic party would be home soon. And he really did not know what his aunt would
do to him.
'Shut me up in a dark cupboard, perhaps,'he thought gloomily, 'or put me to
bed all day to-morrow. Or give me lines to write out, thousands, and thousands,
and thousands, and thousands, and thousands, of them.'
The boat, set in motion by his stepping into it, swung out to the full length
of its rope. The sun was shining almost level across the water. It was a very
still evening, and the reflections of the trees and of the house were as
distinct as the house and the trees themselves. And the water was unusually
clear. He could see the fish swimming about, and the sand and pebbles at the
bottom of the moat. How clear and quiet it looked down there, and what fun the
fishes seemed to be having.
'I wish I was a fish,' said Kenneth. 'Nobody punishes them for
taking rings they didn'ttake.'
[p248] And then suddenly he saw the ring itself, lying calm, and
quiet, and round, and shining, on the smooth sand at the bottom of the moat.
He reached for the boat-hook and leaned over the edge of the boat trying to
get up the ring on the boat-hook's point. Then there was a splash.
'Good gracious! I wonder what that is?'said cook in the kitchen, and dropped
the saucepan with the welsh rabbit in it which she had just made for kitchen
supper.
Kenneth had leaned out too far over the edge of the boat, the boat had
suddenly decided to go the other way, and Kenneth had fallen into the water.
The first thing he felt was delicious coolness, the second that his clothes
had gone, and the next thing he noticed was that he was swimming quite easily
and comfortably under water, and that he had no trouble with his breathing, such
as people who tell you not to fall into water seem to expect you to have. Also
he could see quite well, which he had never been able to do under water
before.
'I can't think,' he said to himself, 'why people make so much fuss about your
falling into the water. I sha'n't be in a hurry to get out. I'll swim right
round the moat while I'm about it.'
[opp
p248]
 There was a splash.
[p249] It was a very much longer swim than he expected, and as
he swam he noticed one or two things that struck him as rather odd. One was that
he couldn't see his hands. And another was that he couldn't feel his feet. And
he met some enormous fishes, like great cod or halibut, they seemed. He had had
no idea that there were fresh-water fish of that size.
They towered above him more like men-o'-war than fish, and he was rather glad
to get past them. There were numbers of smaller fishes, some about his own size,
he thought. They seemed to be enjoying themselves extremely, and he admired the
clever quickness with which they darted out of the way of the great hulking
fish.
And then suddenly he ran into something hard and very solid, and a voice
above him said crossly:
'Now then, who are you a-shoving of? Can't you keep your eyes open, and keep
your nose out of gentlemen's shirt fronts?'
'I beg your pardon,' said Kenneth, trying to rub his nose, and not being able
to. 'I didn't know people could talk under water,' he added very much astonished
to find that talking under water was as easy to him as swimming there.
[p250] 'Fish can talk under water, of course,' said the voice,
'if they didn't, they'd never talk at all: they certainly can't talk
out of it.'
'But I'm not a fish,' said Kenneth, and felt himself grin at the absurd
idea.
'Yes, you are,' said the voice, 'of course you're a fish,' and Kenneth, with
a shiver of certainty, felt that the voice spoke the truth. He was a
fish. He must have become a fish at the very moment when he fell into the water.
That accounted for his not being able to see his hands or feel his feet. Because
of course his hands were fins and his feet were a tail.
'Who are you?' he asked the voice, and his own voice trembled.
'I'm the Doyen Carp,' said the voice.'You must be a very new fish indeed or
you'd know that. Come up, and let's have a look at you.'
Kenneth came up and found himself face to face with an enormous fish who had
round staring eyes and a mouth that opened and shut continually. It opened
square like a kit-bag, and it shut with an extremely sour and severe expression
like that of an offended rhinoceros.
'Yes,' said the Carp, 'you are a new fish. Who put you in?'
'I fell in,' said Kenneth, 'out of the boat,[p251but I'm not a fish at all,
really I'm not. I'm a boy, but I don't suppose you'll believe me.'
'Why shouldn't I believe you?' asked the Carp wagging a slow fin. 'Nobody
tells untruths under water.'
And if you come to think of it, no one ever does.
'Tell me your true story,' said the Carp very lazily. And Kenneth told
it.
'Ah! these humans!' said the Carp when he had done. 'Always in such a hurry
to think the worst of everybody!' He opened his mouth squarely and shut it
contemptuously.'You're jolly lucky, you are. Not one boy in a million turns into
a fish, let me tell you.'
'Do you mean that I've got to go on being a fish?' Kenneth
asked.
'Of course you'll go on being a fish as long as you stop in the water. You
couldn't live here, you know, if you weren't.'
'I might if I was an eel,' said Kenneth, and thought himself very clever.
'Well, be an eel then,' said the Carp, and swam away sneering and
stately. Kenneth had to swim his hardest to catch up.
'Then if I get out of the water, shall I be a boy again?' he asked
panting.
'Of course, silly,' said the Carp, 'only you can't get out.'
[p252] 'Oh! can't I?' said Kenneth the fish, whisked his tail
and swam off. He went straight back to the amethyst ring, picked it up in his
mouth, and swam into the shallows at the edge of the moat. Then he tried to
climb up the slanting mud and on to the grassy bank, but the grass hurt his fins
horribly, and when he put his nose out of the water, the air stifled him, and he
was glad to slip back again. Then he tried to jump out of the water, but he
could only jump straight up into the air, so of course he fell straight down
again into the water. He began to be afraid, and the thought that perhaps he was
doomed to remain for ever a fish was indeed a terrible one. He wanted to cry,
but the tears would not come out of his eyes. Perhaps there was no room for any
more water in the moat.
The smaller fishes called to him in a friendly jolly way to come and play
with them-they were having a quite exciting game of follow-my-leader among some
enormous water-lily stalks that looked like trunks of great trees. But Kenneth
had no heart for games just then.
He swam miserably round the moat looking for the old Carp, his only
acquaintance in this strange wet world. And at last, pushing through a thick
tangle of water weeds he found the great fish.
[p253] 'Now then,' said the Carp testily, 'haven't you any
better manners than to come tearing a gentleman's bed-curtains like that?'
'I beg your pardon,' said Kenneth Fish,'but I know how clever you are. Do
please help me.'
'What do you want now?' said the Carp, and spoke a little less crossly.
'I want to get out. I want to go and be a boy again.'
'But you must have said you wanted to be a fish.'
'I didn't mean it, if I did.'
'You shouldn't say what you don't mean.'
'I'll try not to again,' said Kenneth humbly,'but how can I get out?'
'There's only one way,' said the Carp rolling his vast body over in his
watery bed, 'and a jolly unpleasant way it is. Far better stay here and be a
good little fish. On the honour of a gentleman that's the best thing you can
do.'
'I want to get out,' said Kenneth again.
'Well then, the only way is … you know we always teach the young fish to look
out for hooks so that they may avoid them. Youmust look out for a hook
and take it. Let them catch you. On a hook.'
The Carp shuddered and went on solemnly,[p254'Have you strength? Have you
patience? Have you high courage and determination? You will want them all. Have
you all these?'
'I don't know what I've got,' said poor Kenneth, 'except that I've got a tail
and fins, and I don't know a hook when I see it. Won't you come with me? Oh!
dear Mr. Doyen Carp, do come and show me a hook.'
'It will hurt you,' said the Carp, 'very much indeed. You take a gentleman's
word for it.'
'I know,' said Kenneth, 'you needn't rub it in.'
The Carp rolled heavily out of his bed.
'Come on then,' he said, 'I don't admire your taste, but if you want
a hook, well, the gardener's boy is fishing in the cool of the evening. Come
on.'
He led the way with a steady stately movement.
'I want to take the ring with me,' said Kenneth, 'but I can't get hold of it.
Do you think you could put it on my fin with your snout?'
'My what!' shouted the old Carp indignantly and stopped dead.
'Your nose, I meant,' said Kenneth. 'Oh! please don't be angry. It would be
so kind of you if you would. Shove the ring on, I mean.'
[p255] 'That will hurt too,' said the Carp, and Kenneth thought
he seemed not altogether sorry that it should.
It did hurt very much indeed. The ring was hard and heavy, and somehow
Kenneth's fin would not fold up small enough for the ring to slip over it, and
the Carp's big mouth was rather clumsy at the work. But at last it was done. And
then they set out in search of a hook for Kenneth to be caught with.
'I wish we could find one! I wish we could!' Kenneth Fish kept saying.
'You're just looking for trouble,' said the Carp. 'Well, here you are!'
Above them in the clear water hung a delicious-looking worm. Kenneth Boy did
not like worms any better than you do, but to Kenneth Fish that worm looked most
tempting and delightful.
'Just wait a sec.,' he said, 'till I get that worm.'
'You little silly,' said the Carp, 'that's the hook. Take it.'
'Wait a sec.,' said Kenneth again.
His courage was beginning to ooze out of his fin tips, and a shiver ran down
him from gills to tail.
'If you once begin to think about a hook you never take it,' said the
Carp.
[p256] 'Never?' said Kenneth 'Then … oh! good-bye!' he
cried desperately, and snapped at the worm. A sharp pain ran through his head
and he felt himself drawn up into the air, that stifling, choking, husky, thick
stuff in which fish cannot breathe. And as he swung in the air the dreadful
thought came to him, 'Suppose I don't turn into a boy again? Suppose I keep
being a fish?' And then he wished he hadn't. But it was too late to wish
that.
Everything grew quite dark, only inside his head there seemed to be a light.
There was a wild, rushing, buzzing noise, then something in his head seemed to
break and he knew no more.
* * * * *
When presently he knew things again, he was lying on something hard. Was he
Kenneth Fish lying on a stone at the bottom of the moat, or Kenneth Boy lying
somewhere out of the water? His breathing was all right, so he wasn't a fish out
of water or a boy under it.
'He's coming to,' said a voice. The Carp's he thought it was. But next moment
he knew it to be the voice of his aunt, and he moved his hand and felt grass in
it. He opened his eyes and saw above him the soft gray of the evening sky with a
star or two.
'Here's the ring, Aunt,' he said.
* * * * *
[opp
p256]
 'Oh, good-bye!' he cried desperately, and snapped
at the worm.
[p257] The cook had heard a splash and had run out just as the
picnic party arrived at the front door. They had all rushed to the moat, and the
uncle had pulled Kenneth out with the boat-hook. He had not been in the water
more than three minutes, they said. But Kenneth knew better.
They carried him in, very wet he was, and laid him on the breakfast-room
sofa, where the aunt with hurried thoughtfulness had spread out the uncle's
mackintosh.
'Get some rough towels, Jane,' said the aunt. 'Make haste, do.'
'I got the ring,' said Kenneth.
'Never mind about the ring, dear,' said the aunt, taking his boots off.
'But you said I was a thief and a liar,'Kenneth said feebly, 'and it was in
the moat all the time.'
'Mother!' it was Alison who shrieked.'You didn't say that to
him?'
'Of course I didn't,' said the aunt impatiently. She thought she hadn't, but
then Kenneth thought she had.
'It was me took the ring,' said Alison, 'and I dropped it. I didn't
say I hadn't. I only said I'd rather not say. Oh Mother! poor Kenneth!'
The aunt, without a word, carried Kenneth[p258up to the bath-room and turned
on the hot-water tap. The uncle and Ethel followed.
'Why didn't you own up, you sneak?' said Conrad to his sister with withering
scorn.
'Sneak,' echoed the stout George.
'I meant to. I was only getting steam up,'sobbed Alison. 'I didn't know.
Mother only told us she wasn't pleased with Ken, and so he wasn't to go to the
picnic. Oh! what shall I do? What shall I do?'
'Sneak!' said her brothers in chorus, and left her to her tears of shame and
remorse.
It was Kenneth who next day begged every one to forgive and forget. And as it
washis day-rather like a birthday, you know-when no one could refuse
him anything, all agreed that the whole affair should be buried in oblivion.
Every one was tremendously kind, the aunt more so than any one. But Alison's
eyes were still red when in the afternoon they all went fishing once more. And
before Kenneth's hook had been two minutes in the water there was a bite, a very
big fish, the uncle had to be called from his study to land it.
'Here's a magnificent fellow,' said the uncle.'Not an ounce less than two
pounds, Ken. I'll have it stuffed for you.'
And he held out the fish and Kenneth found himself face to face with the
Doyen Carp.[p259There was no mistaking that
mouth that opened like a kit-bag, and shut in a sneer like a rhinoceros's. Its
eye was most reproachful.
'Oh! no,' cried Kenneth, 'you helped me back and I'll help you back,' and he
caught the Carp from the hands of the uncle and flung it out in the moat.
'Your head's not quite right yet, my boy,'said the uncle kindly. 'Hadn't you
better go in and lie down a bit?'
But Alison understood, for he had told her the whole story. He had told her
that morning before breakfast while she was still in deep disgrace; to cheer her
up, he said. And, most disappointingly, it made her cry more than ever.
'Your poor little fins,' she had said, 'and having your feet tied up in your
tail. And it was all my fault.'
'I liked it,' Kenneth had said with earnest politeness, 'it was
a most awful lark.' And he quite meant what he said.
[p260] XII THE MAGICIAN'S HEART
We all have our weaknesses. Mine is mulberries.
Yours, perhaps, motor cars. Professor Taykin's was christenings-royal
christenings. He always expected to be asked to the christening parties of all
the little royal babies, and of course he never was, because he was not a lord,
or a duke, or a seller of bacon and tea, or anything really high-class, but
merely a wicked magician, who by economy and strict attention to customers had
worked up a very good business of his own. He had not always been wicked. He was
born quite good, I believe, and his old nurse, who had long since married a
farmer and retired into the calm of country life, always used to say that he was
the duckiest little boy in a plaid frock with the dearest little fat legs. But
he had changed since he was a boy, as a good many other people do-perhaps it was
his trade. I dare say you've noticed that cobblers are usually[p261thin, and brewers are generally
fat, and magicians are almost always wicked.
Well, his weakness (for christenings) grew stronger and stronger because it
was never indulged, and at last he 'took the bull into his own hands,' as the
Irish footman at the palace said, and went to a christening without being asked.
It was a very grand party given by the King of the Fortunate Islands, and the
little prince was christened Fortunatus. No one took any notice of Professor
Taykin. They were too polite to turn him out, but they made him wish he'd never
come. He felt quite an outsider, as indeed he was, and this made him furious. So
that when all the bright, light, laughing, fairy godmothers were crowding round
the blue satin cradle, and giving gifts of beauty and strength and goodness to
the baby, the Magician suddenly did a very difficult charm (in his head, like
you do mental arithmetic), and said:
'Young Forty may be all that, but I say he shall be the stupidest
prince in the world,'and on that he vanished in a puff of red smoke with a smell
like the Fifth of November in a back garden on Streatham Hill, and as he left no
address the King of the Fortunate Islands couldn't prosecute him for high
treason.
Taykin was very glad to think that he had[p262made such a lot of people
unhappy-the whole Court was in tears when he left, including the baby-and he
looked in the papers for another royal christening, so that he could go to that
and make a lot more people miserable. And there was one fixed for the very next
Wednesday. The Magician went to that, too, disguised as a wealthy.
This time the baby was a girl. Taykin kept close to the pink velvet cradle,
and when all the nice qualities in the world had been given to the Princess he
suddenly said, 'Little Aura may be all that, but I say she shall be the
ugliest princess in all the world.'
And instantly she was. It was terrible. And she had been such a beautiful
baby too. Every one had been saying that she was the most beautiful baby they
had ever seen. This sort of thing is often said at christenings.
Having uglified the unfortunate little Princess the Magician did the spell
(in his mind, just as you do your spelling) to make himself vanish, but to his
horror there was no red smoke and no smell of fireworks, and there he was,
still, where he now very much wished not to be. Because one of the fairies there
had seen, just one second too late to save the Princess, what he was up to, and
had made a strong little charm in a great hurry to prevent[p263his
vanishing. This Fairy was a White Witch, and of course you know that White Magic
is much stronger than Black Magic, as well as more suited for drawing-room
performances. So there the Magician stood, 'looking like a thunder-struck pig,'
as some one unkindly said, and the dear White Witch bent down and kissed the
baby princess.
'There!' she said, 'you can keep that kiss till you want it. When the time
comes you'll know what to do with it. The Magician can't vanish, Sire. You'd
better arrest him.'
'Arrest that person,' said the King, pointing to Taykin. 'I suppose your
charms are of a permanent nature, madam.'
'Quite,' said the Fairy, 'at least they never go till there's no longer any
use for them.'
So the Magician was shut up in an enormously high tower, and allowed to play
with magic; but none of his spells could act outside the tower so he was never
able to pass the extra double guard that watched outside night and day. The King
would have liked to have the Magician executed but the White Witch warned him
that this would never do.
'Don't you see,' she said, 'he's the only person who can make the Princess
beautiful again. And he'll do it some day. But don't you go asking him
to do it. He'll never do[p264anything to oblige you. He's that sort of man.'
So the years rolled on. The Magician stayed in the tower and did magic and
was very bored,-for it is dull to take white rabbits out of your hat, and your
hat out of nothing when there's no one to see you.
Prince Fortunatus was such a stupid little boy that he got lost quite early
in the story, and went about the country saying his name was James, which it
wasn't. A baker's wife found him and adopted him, and sold the diamond buttons
of his little overcoat, for three hundred pounds, and as she was a very honest
woman she put two hundred away for James to have when he grew up.
The years rolled on. Aura continued to be hideous, and she was very unhappy,
till on her twentieth birthday her married cousin Belinda came to see her. Now
Belinda had been made ugly in her cradle too, so she could sympathise as no one
else could.
'But I got out of it all right, and so will you,' said Belinda. 'I'm
sure the first thing to do is to find a magician.'
'Father banished them all twenty years ago,' said Aura behind her veil, 'all
but the one who uglified me.'
'Then I should go to him,' said beautiful[p265Belinda. 'Dress up as a beggar maid, and give him fifty pounds
to do it. Not more, or he may suspect that you're not a beggar maid. It will be
great fun. I'd go with you only I promised Bellamant faithfully that I'd be home
to lunch.' And off she went in her mother-of-pearl coach, leaving Aura to look
through the bound volumes of The Perfect Lady in the palace
library, to find out the proper costume for a beggar maid.
Now that very morning the Magician's old nurse had packed up a ham, and some
eggs, and some honey, and some apples, and a sweet bunch of old-fashioned
flowers, and borrowed the baker's boy to hold the horse for her, and started off
to see the Magician. It was forty years since she'd seen him, but she loved him
still, and now she thought she could do him a good turn. She asked in the town
for his address, and learned that he lived in the Black Tower.
'But you'd best be careful,' the townsfolk said, 'he's a spiteful chap.'
'Bless you,' said the old nurse, 'he won't hurt me as nursed him when he was
a babe, in a plaid frock with the dearest little fat legs ever you see.'
So she got to the tower, and the guards let her through. Taykin was almost
pleased to[p266see her-remember he had had no
visitors for twenty years-and he was quite pleased to see the ham and the
honey.
'But where did I put them heggs?' said the nurse, 'and the apples-I
must have left them at home after all.'
She had. But the Magician just waved his hand in the air, and there was a
basket of apples that hadn't
been there before. The eggs he took out of her bonnet, the folds of her shawl,
and even from his own mouth, just like a conjurer does. Only of course he was a
real Magician.
'Lor!' said she, 'it's like magic.'
'It is magic,' said he. 'That's my trade. It's quite a pleasure to
have an audience again. I've lived here alone for twenty years. It's very
lonely, especially of an evening.'
'Can't you get out?' said the nurse.
'No. King's orders must be respected, but it's a dog's life.' He sniffed,
made himself a magic handkerchief out of empty air, and wiped his eyes.
'Take an apprentice, my dear,' said the nurse.
'And teach him my magic? Not me.'
'Suppose you got one so stupid he couldn'tlearn?'
'That would be all right-but it's no use[p267advertising for a stupid
person-you'd get no answers.'
'You needn't advertise,' said the nurse; and she went out and brought in
James, who was really the Prince of the Fortunate Islands, and also the baker's
boy she had brought with her to hold the horse's head.
'Now, James,' she said, 'you'd like to be apprenticed, wouldn't you?'
'Yes,' said the poor stupid boy.
'Then give the gentleman your money, James.'
James did.
'My last doubts vanish,' said the Magician, 'heis stupid. Nurse, let
us celebrate the occasion with a little drop of something. Not before the boy
because of setting an example. James, wash up. Not here, silly; in the back
kitchen.'
So James washed up, and as he was very clumsy he happened to break a little
bottle of essence of dreams that was on the shelf, and instantly there floated
up from the washing-up water the vision of a princess more beautiful than the
day-so beautiful that even James could not help seeing how beautiful she was,
and holding out his arms to her as she came floating through the air above the
kitchen sink. But when he held out his arms she vanished. He sighed and washed
up harder than ever.
[p268] 'I wish I wasn't so stupid,' he said, and then there was
a knock at the door. James wiped his hands and opened. Some one stood there in
very picturesque rags and tatters.'Please,' said some one, who was of course the
Princess, 'is Professor Taykin at home?'
'Walk in, please,' said James.
'My snakes alive!' said Taykin, 'what a day we're having. Three visitors in
one morning. How kind of you to call. Won't you take a chair?'
'I hoped,' said the veiled Princess, 'that you'd give me something else to
take.'
'A glass of wine,' said Taykin. 'You'll take a glass of wine?'
'No, thank you,' said the beggar maid who was the Princess.
'Then take … take your veil off,' said the nurse, 'or you won't feel the
benefit of it when you go out.'
'I can't,' said Aura, 'it wouldn't be safe.'
'Too beautiful, eh?' said the Magician.'Still-you're quite safe here.'
'Can you do magic?' she abruptly asked.
'A little,' said he ironically.
'Well,' said she, 'it's like this. I'm so ugly no one can bear to look at me.
And I want to go as kitchenmaid to the palace. They want a cook and a scullion
and a kitchenmaid.[p269I
thought perhaps you'd give me something to make me pretty. I'm only a poor
beggar maid…. It would be a great thing to me if….'
'Go along with you,' said Taykin, very cross indeed. 'I never give to
beggars.'
'Here's twopence,' whispered poor James, pressing it into her hand, 'it's all
I've got left.'
'Thank you,' she whispered back. 'Youare good.'
And to the Magician she said:
'I happen to have fifty pounds. I'll give it you for a new face.'
'Done,' cried Taykin. 'Here's another stupid one!' He grabbed the money,
waved his wand, and then and there before the astonished eyes of the nurse and
the apprentice the ugly beggar maid became the loveliest princess in the
world.
'Lor!' said the nurse.
'My dream!' cried the apprentice.
'Please,' said the Princess, 'can I have a looking-glass?' The apprentice ran
to unhook the one that hung over the kitchen sink, and handed it to her. 'Oh,'
she said, 'how verypretty I am. How can I thank you?'
'Quite easily,' said the Magician, 'beggar maid as you are, I hereby offer
you my hand and heart.'
He put his hand into his waistcoat and[p270pulled out his heart. It was
fat and pink, and the Princess did not like the look of it.
'Thank you very much,' said she, 'but I'd rather not.'
'But I insist,' said Taykin.
'But really, your offer….'
'Most handsome, I'm sure,' said the nurse.
'My affections are engaged,' said the Princess, looking down. 'I can't marry
you.'
'Am I to take this as a refusal?' asked Taykin; and the Princess said she
feared that he was.
'Very well, then,' he said, 'I shall see you home, and ask your father about
it. He'll not let you refuse an offer like this. Nurse, come and tie my
necktie.'
So he went out, and the nurse with him.
Then the Princess told the apprentice in a very great hurry who she was.
'It would never do,' she said, 'for him to see me home. He'd find out that I
was the Princess, and he'd uglify me again in no time.'
'He sha'n't see you home,' said James. 'I may be stupid but I'm strong
too.'
'How brave you are,' said Aura admiringly,'but I'd rather slip away quietly,
without any fuss. Can't you undo the patent lock of that door?' The apprentice
tried but he was too[p271stupid, and the Princess was not strong enough.
'I'm sorry,' said the apprentice who was a Prince. 'I can't undo the door,
but when hedoes I'll hold him and you can get away. I dreamed of you
this morning,' he added.
'I dreamed of you too,' said she, 'but you were different.'
'Perhaps,' said poor James sadly, 'the person you dreamed about wasn't
stupid, and I am.'
'Are you really?' cried the Princess. 'Iam so glad!'
'That's rather unkind, isn't it?' said he.
'No; because if that's all that makes you different from the man I
dreamed about I can soon make that all right.'
And with that she put her hands on his shoulders and kissed him. And at her
kiss his stupidness passed away like a cloud, and he became as clever as any one
need be; and besides knowing all the ordinary lessons he would have learned if
he had stayed at home in his palace, he knew who he was, and where he was, and
why, and he knew all the geography of his father's kingdom, and the exports and
imports and the condition of politics. And he knew also that the Princess loved
him.
So he caught her in his arms and kissed[p272her, and they were very happy,
and told each other over and over again what a beautiful world it was, and how
wonderful it was that they should have found each other, seeing that the world
is not only beautiful but rather large.
'That first one was a magic kiss, you know,'said she. 'My fairy godmother
gave it to me, and I've been keeping it all these years for you. You must get
away from here, and come to the palace. Oh, you'll manage it-you're clever
now.'
'Yes,' he said, 'I am clever now. I can undo the lock for you. Go,
my dear, go before he comes back.'
So the Princess went. And only just in time; for as she went out of one door
Taykin came in at the other.
He was furious to find her gone; and I should not like to write down the
things he said to his apprentice when he found that James had been so stupid as
to open the door for her. They were not polite things at all.
He tried to follow her. But the Princess had warned the guards, and he could
not get out.
'Oh,' he cried, 'if only my old magic would work outside this tower. I'd soon
be even with her.'
And then in a strange, confused, yet quite[p273sure way, he felt that the
spell that held him, the White Witch's spell, was dissolved.
'To the palace!' he cried; and rushing to the cauldron that hung over the
fire he leaped into it, leaped out in the form of a red lion, and
disappeared.
Without a moment's hesitation the Prince, who was his apprentice, followed
him, calling out the same words and leaping into the same cauldron, while the
poor nurse screamed and wrung her hands. As he touched the liquor in the
cauldron he felt that he was not quite himself. He was, in fact, a green dragon.
He felt himself vanish-a most uncomfortable sensation-and reappeared, with a
suddenness that took his breath away, in his own form and at the back door of
the palace.
The time had been short, but already the Magician had succeeded in obtaining
an engagement as palace cook. How he did it without references I don't know.
Perhaps he made the references by magic as he had made the eggs, and the apples,
and the handkerchief.
Taykin's astonishment and annoyance at being followed by his faithful
apprentice were soon soothed, for he saw that a stupid scullion would be of
great use. Of course he had no idea that James had been made clever by a
kiss.
[p274] 'But how are you going to cook?' asked the apprentice.
'You don't know how!'
'I shall cook,' said Taykin, 'as I do everything else-by magic.' And he did.
I wish I had time to tell you how he turned out a hot dinner of seventeen
courses from totally empty saucepans, how James looked in a cupboard for spices
and found it empty, and how next moment the nurse walked out of it. The Magician
had been so long alone that he seemed to revel in the luxury of showing off to
some one, and he leaped about from one cupboard to another, produced cats and
cockatoos out of empty jars, and made mice and rabbits disappear and reappear
till James's head was in a whirl, for all his cleverness; and the nurse, as she
washed up, wept tears of pure joy at her boy's wonderful skill.
'All this excitement's bad for my heart, though,' Taykin said at last, and
pulling his heart out of his chest, he put it on a shelf, and as he did so his
magic note-book fell from his breast and the apprentice picked it up. Taykin did
not see him do it; he was busy making the kitchen lamp fly about the room like a
pigeon.
It was just then that the Princess came in, looking more lovely than ever in
a simple little morning frock of white chiffon and diamonds.
[p275] 'The beggar maid,' said Taykin, 'looking like a princess!
I'll marry her just the same.'
'I've come to give the orders for dinner,'she said; and then she saw who it
was, and gave one little cry and stood still, trembling.
'To order the dinner,' said the nurse.'Then you're--'
'Yes,' said Aura, 'I'm the Princess.'
'You're the Princess,' said the Magician.'Then I'll marry you all the more.
And if you say no I'll uglify you as the word leaves your lips. Oh, yes-you
think I've just been amusing myself over my cooking-but I've really been brewing
the strongest spell in the world. Marry me-or drink--'
The Princess shuddered at these dreadful words.
'Drink, or marry me,' said the Magician.'If you marry me you shall be
beautiful for ever.'
'Ah,' said the nurse, 'he's a match even for a Princess.'
'I'll tell papa,' said the Princess, sobbing.
'No, you won't,' said Taykin. 'Your father will never know. If you won't
marry me you shall drink this and become my scullery maid-my hideous scullery
maid-and wash up for ever in the lonely tower.'
[p276] He caught her by the wrist.
'Stop,' cried the apprentice, who was a Prince.
'Stop? Me? Nonsense! Pooh!' said the Magician.
'Stop, I say!' said James, who was Fortunatus. 'I've got your
heart!' He had-and he held it up in one hand, and in the other a cooking
knife.
'One step nearer that lady,' said he, 'and in goes the knife.'
The Magician positively skipped in his agony and terror.
'I say, look out!' he cried. 'Be careful what you're doing. Accidents happen
so easily! Suppose your foot slipped! Then no apologies would meet the case.
That's my heart you've got there. My life's bound up in it.'
'I know. That's often the case with people's hearts,' said Fortunatus. 'We've
got you, my dear sir, on toast. My Princess, might I trouble you to call the
guards.'
The Magician did not dare to resist, so the guards arrested him. The nurse,
though in floods of tears, managed to serve up a very good plain dinner, and
after dinner the Magician was brought before the King.
Now the King, as soon as he had seen that[p277his daughter had been made so
beautiful, had caused a large number of princes to be fetched by telephone. He
was anxious to get her married at once in case she turned ugly again. So before
he could do justice to the Magician he had to settle which of the princes was to
marry the Princess. He had chosen the Prince of the Diamond Mountains, a very
nice steady young man with a good income. But when he suggested the match to the
Princess she declined it, and the Magician, who was standing at the foot of the
throne steps loaded with chains, clattered forward and said:
'Your Majesty, will you spare my life if I tell you something you don't
know?'
The King, who was a very inquisitive man, said 'Yes.'
'Then know,' said Taykin, 'that the Princess won't marry your
choice, because she's made one of her own-my apprentice.'
The Princess meant to have told her father this when she had got him alone
and in a good temper. But now he was in a bad temper, and in full audience.
The apprentice was dragged in, and all the Princess's agonized pleadings only
got this out of the King-
'All right. I won't hang him. He shall be best man at your wedding.'
[p278] Then the King took his daughter's hand and set her in the
middle of the hall, and set the Prince of the Diamond Mountains on her right and
the apprentice on her left. Then he said:
'I will spare the life of this aspiring youth on your left if you'll promise
never to speak to him again, and if you'll promise to marry the gentleman on
your right before tea this afternoon.'
The wretched Princess looked at her lover, and his lips formed the word
'Promise.'
So she said: 'I promise never to speak to the gentleman on my left and to
marry the gentleman on my right before tea to-day,' and held out her hand to the
Prince of the Diamond Mountains.
Then suddenly, in the twinkling of an eye, the Prince of the Diamond
Mountains was on her left, and her hand was held by her own Prince, who stood at
her right hand. And yet nobody seemed to have moved. It was the purest and most
high-class magic.
'Dished,' cried the King, 'absolutely dished!'
'A mere trifle,' said the apprentice modestly.'I've got Taykin's magic recipe
book, as well as his heart.'
'Well, we must make the best of it, I[p279suppose,' said the King crossly. 'Bless you, my children.'
He was less cross when it was explained to him that the apprentice was really
the Prince of the Fortunate Islands, and a much better match than the Prince of
the Diamond Mountains, and he was quite in a good temper by the time the nurse
threw herself in front of the throne and begged the King to let the Magician off
altogether-chiefly on the ground that when he was a baby he was the dearest
little duck that ever was, in the prettiest plaid frock, with the loveliest fat
legs.
The King, moved by these arguments, said:
'I'll spare him if he'll promise to be good.'
'You will, ducky, won't you?' said the nurse, crying.
'No,' said the Magician, 'I won't; and what's more, I can't.'
The Princess, who was now so happy that she wanted every one else to be happy
too, begged her lover to make Taykin good 'by magic.'
'Alas, my dearest Lady,' said the Prince,'no one can be made good by magic. I
could take the badness out of him-there's an excellent recipe in this
note-book-but if I did that there'd be so very little left.'
[p280] 'Every little helps,' said the nurse wildly.
Prince Fortunatus, who was James, who was the apprentice, studied the book
for a few moments, and then said a few words in a language no one present had
ever heard before.
And as he spoke the wicked Magician began to tremble and shrink.
'Oh, my boy-be good! Promise you'll be good,' cried the nurse, still in
tears.
The Magician seemed to be shrinking inside his clothes. He grew smaller and
smaller. The nurse caught him in her arms, and still he grew less and less, till
she seemed to be holding nothing but a bundle of clothes. Then with a cry of
love and triumph she tore the Magician's clothes away and held up a chubby baby
boy, with the very plaid frock and fat legs she had so often and so lovingly
described.
'I said there wouldn't be much of him when the badness was out,' said the
Prince Fortunatus.
'I will be good; oh, I will,' said the baby boy that had been the
Magician.
'I'll see to that,' said the nurse. And so the story ends with love and a
wedding, and showers of white roses.
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